ThaBerean

Can't Shake Tha West Side

2009-02-01T20:32:00.002-06:00

So I am in the process of moving... I'm all set to drop a 'guap' (translation: lot of money) on a nice new apartment (over 1000 sq. ft., which is heaven to me, as I've lived in a 1 BR garden apt. for 6 years now) overlooking the lake. Modern appliances, great neighborhood. Underground parking -- whoo hoo!!! Just what I need in snowy-behind Chicago. Dishwasher. 2 BR, 2 bathroom (never mind that I don't need 2 bathrooms)...

So I'm on my way to put down the security deposit and sign the lease, but I haven't felt comfortable about this decision. Something's just not quite right... So I turn my car around and drive around aimlessly.

Through God's providence, and the prayers of the saints, I end up looking at a much cheaper ($400/month less) apt, still 2 BRs, but much smaller space, older apt., old appliances, there goes my stainless steel kitchen sink! But I believe this is how God's leading. The other apt. was what my flesh wanted, and what the devil and 'self' said I deserved, but not what I'm seeking anymore right now. Doesn't make sense to pay all that money just 'cuz I have it, esp. when I could save for a house and used car. Biggest thing, though, is that I can't disrupt my little one's life that much. Already her bus ride to school is 45-60 mins. each way. Moving to Oakland-Kenwood would add at least 30 mins. each way to her route, perhaps more in the p.m. due to rush hour. So I gave up wrestling and made the decision I know God wants of me...

It's amazing how peace comes when you mortify the flesh and just stop fighting and obey God.

So this week I'll move, to an apt. less than 5 mins. from my current one, w. 1 extra bedroom, but everything else pretty much the same. I am thankful, though, for God's guidance. I appreciate His work on my conscience, taking away my peace until I did what was best.

That's why He's God...

Faves

2008-12-13T21:20:00.004-06:00

Favorite Bible teachers: Allistair Begg, Ravi Zacharias, Michael Youssef, Tony Evans, Crawford Loritz, Arthur Jackson

Favorite musical artists: Shachah, Ambassador, Lecrae, Trip Lee, 116 Clique

What Difference Does A Black President Make?

2008-11-10T05:30:00.002-06:00

Here's a clue:

As talk is happening over key positions in the White House, like Attorney General and White House Counsel, for the first time I'm hearing of TONS of qualified Black and female candidates. Names like Deval Patrick, Eric Holder, Mark Alexander, and Janet Napolitano are being passed around, along with some white potentials. But here's the thing: This is the FIRST time people of color and women are in the first round of candidates, rather than an afterthought to satisfy a special interest group. That's pretty phenomenal to me, and it shows why it's important to have a Black person in the White House. And with the exception of one person, I've never even heard of these qualified African-Americans and women! Go figure! Based on the actions of our former Presidents, you would have thought that there are no competent candidates of color and few qualified women out there for top White House spots! Humph!!!

Election Day

2008-11-04T06:28:00.002-06:00

Boy, am I excited!!! I'm sitting here waiting for my 6:30am babysitter to come so I can go vote before heading off to work. I am watching CNN and seeing tons of folks - BLACK folks - standing on line in Philadelphia and St. Louis and Richmond waiting to vote. Man, I am so proud of my people!!!

To say this is an historical moment in our country is an understatement. I hate to say it, but for many folks, this is the first time they've felt their vote had even a chance of mattering (is 'mattering' a word?).

Gotta go -- the doorbell's ringing!

Woman to Woman: The Problem with Palin

2008-10-05T16:18:00.003-05:00

Okay, so I'm catching up on this week's Vice Presidential debates even as we speak. And, no, I'm not a fan of Palin. Never mind that her lack of legislative experience makes Republicans look like major hypocrites for criticizing the Junior Statesman's short term in Congress. Never mind that some of her practices as mayor of a very small town and as governor smack of the corruption and ethical improprieties for which politicians are known. Never mind a lotta things.

What bugs me is that Palin's obvious incompetence (did you see the Charlie Gibson and Katie Couric interviews) threatens to set woman back in the public eye. I'm a working mom, so you'll never catch me questioning whether we as women can 'have it all'. And I'm a fairly conservative Christian (with independent leanings at times), so you won't catch me ridiculing her beliefs on such controversial matters as abortion. But if, Palin, you're going to get out there and run for the second highest office in the nation, please be ready for it. Otherwise, sit on down. Rather than embarrass women everywhere by trying to pass off charisma and flash for substance, just know your limitations and sit on down.

I pray to God the Republicans don't take it this go around, because Palin is a joke, and the little respect I had for McCain is gone. Why? Because, with the one major decision he's had to make since running for President, he's shown an incredible lack of judgment that takes away any confidence I'd have in him.

On the other hand, Obama, with all of his 'inexperience', has, in the one major choice he's made since running, shown an incredible amount of wisdom. Much like Abraham Lincoln (who, by the way, went into the Presidency with so much inexperience that no one thought he'd have a chance, especially against his politically-seasoned rivals), Obama has managed to see past previous disagreements with Biden to choose someone who complements him well. Mark of a great leader.

BTW, Team of Rivals is a great (albeit long) book detailing Lincoln's journey to the White House, and then his remarkable ability to build a strong cabinet, comprised of his rivals for the Executive Office. Worth checkin' out.

They Got O.J.

2008-10-05T01:39:00.002-05:00

Okay, so they finally got O.J. on something. Guilty on all charges. I'm interested in seeing what the sentencing will be. Can't say I'm mad at the jury, and I must admit that I was happy to see O.J. convicted. Yes, I felt he was guilty of the double homicide 13 years ago. But more importantly for this case, I feel he was guilty of the charges lodged against him. In this case there was more evidence (audiotapes and witnesses), though I do wonder why people had audiotapes present, and I am disappointed at hearing the Las Vegas policemen's comments that clearly mean they judged O.J. by his past - didn't make their decisions based solely on the present. Either way, I feel like the hands of justice move slowly, but in this case, they were on time.

I'm Related to Diddy

2008-09-29T20:42:00.003-05:00

We belong to the same family. Watching "I Want to Work for Diddy" for a while now, I've realized that P. Diddy and I share some of the same characteristics; we share a similar work ethic or approach to what we do.

It's called workaholism, and I'm not particularly proud of it. In fact, I'm trying to change it a bit. But that still doesn't negate the fact that when it comes to work, Diddy and I are beyond first cousins -- we're brother and sister.

Don't believe me? Just check out some of his famous sayings -- "Diddy-isms":

1) Either go hard or go home. (Ew, I love this...)

2) Make it happen. (a.k.a. "Make a way out of no way.")

3) "Life is not a game. Only the fittest and most aggressive will survive. Sleep is forbidden. A second cannot be wasted. Once seconds are lost, you lose. And losing is for losers."

Another case in point: Diddy's metaphors for life, like his comparing life to hustling (not the negative side, of hustling someone out of something, but the positive side, of hustling harder or working harder and striving harder to get to a certain goal), or his comparing his career to climbing a mountain (an on-going journey).

What about people's characterizations of Diddy: He 'throws a million things at us at once,' and 'he wants things how he wants them'.

Or, how about Diddy's own description of himself: I 'start my day...flying at the speed of light.' And, 'some people say I have a very strong or intimidating energy...Well, that energy is "I play to win," and the people who are full of it are scared of me.'

Don't get me wrong; Diddy and I don't share everything in common. He's far more optimistic and materialistic, and I have problems with his insistence that he's spiritual yet his clearly carnal music and music production and lifestyle. Not to mention I have absolutely no fashion sense, and Diddy is a fashion guru. But when it comes to the work ethic and the mindset about success, the drive and the blunt honesty, and the lack of tolerance for a disease he calls by a name I can't say, I swear, Diddy's my 'brother by a different mother.'

"Lakeview Terrace"

2008-09-27T08:06:00.003-05:00

Last night I went to see the new Samuel Jackson and Kerry Washington movie, "Lakeview Terrace". It wasn't great, but it wasn't bad either. It was "Training Day" meets "Twelve Angry Men" meets "Crash". As always, Samuel Jackson's performance was on point, but the rest of the actors and actresses didn't stand out. The most intriguing thing about the movie, outside of Jackson's acting, was the courage of the storyline to explore the race theme.

Sorry to be the spoiler, but the movie's about a Black cop whose late wife cheated on him with her white boss (you find this out near the movie's end, but the formulaic plot makes it obvious from the first minute of the film). So, his grudge against interracial couples leads him to make the lives of his neighbors (a white man married to a Black woman) a living hell. Michael Keaton's "Pacific Heights" performance was much more thrilling and believable, but Jackson's character (Abel Turner) combines wit and cynicism with the psychopath mentality. What was disappointing was the mixture of religious fundamentalism in Jackson's character - not necessary, from my view.

But back to the theme of race. The best part of the movie, to me, was the portrayal of the difficulties that this interracial couple faces due to America's poor legacy of race relations. We're used to seeing TV and film portray white bigots, but this movie turns racism on its head and makes the Black lead character the one who's racist. Yeah, I know the old line that Blacks can't be racist because we don't have power (we can be prejudiced, though, since prejudice is an attitude); I just don't buy that bullcrap. And the scenes where the white husband is tired and frustrated at dealing with the mistreatment he receives because he's in an interracial marriage, and the Black wife tells him he has no idea -- no clue -- of how exasperating it is to deal with racism -- now those scenes are priceless. As are the innuendoes that some whites' adoption of "Black" mores might be rooted in an identity crisis of their own or a desire to experiment with the 'exotic', and the double standard Black women face when they date white men -- the stigma they encounter that isn't there when Black men date and marry white women.

Though "Lakeview Terrace" lacks the suspenseful depth and believability of, say, a "Pacific Heights", or the well-written script of a "Crash", it does have the courage to unearth some of the issues that come with race relations in America. I just hope movie-goers are up for the "courageous conversations about race" this movie sets the stage for.

Fine Black Men

2008-09-06T21:44:00.002-05:00

Okay, am I hormonal or something? This weekend I've been thinking a lot about the beauty in the Black race, esp. when it comes to brothers. Here's my list of the finest Black men on the planet:
Tyrese
Morris Chestnutt
Brian Mcknight
R.L.
Joe
Noel Gourdin
Bokeem Woodbine
Montell Jordan
Denzel Washington
Michael Jordan
LL Cool J
Michael Jai White
Blackstreet – all but one

the list goes on and on...

Exposure

2008-07-19T07:55:00.003-05:00

Today I have the privilege of doing something that some folks might not delight in. But those whose background and upbringing are similar to mine will understand where I'm coming from...

About a month ago we ended the very first year of our new (start-up), small high school. We had the good fortune of starting this school from scratch, beginning with just freshmen (we'll add a grade each year). On purpose we are 'non- selective enrollment', which means we deliberately do not 'cream'. We exist for any student who chooses us, but we target students who normally would not test into our city's top tier high schools, but who still deserve a quality college-prep high school education. We have a long way to go, but last weekend I had one of my 'satisfying moments', one of those experiences that remind me I'm doing what I'm supposed to do. And today is part two of that experience.

I took four of my students to a suburban college to spend a week there at a business camp, learning about business and entrepreneurship, putting together a business plan, taking field trips to downtown businesses, and getting experience of what it's like to be on a college campus. I cannot tell you how excited I was for my students, but also how much I was reminded that lack of 'exposure' is a real reason why many of my people never make it to college.

First, there were more students than the four who went who had the opportunity to attend. Sadly, some parents did not grant permission to their youth to go. My colleagues and friends and I have discussed possible reasons why (that's a whole other blog), but the bottom line is that their fears and short-sightedness stand in the way of their kids' futures.

Second, cost was a real factor. This program is great, but like all summer college programs, there was a cost. The cost was $300., and students would get that money back at the end of the week, when they receive a $500. stipend for completing the program (I had to explain what a stipend was to one of my students -- the only one bold enough to ask/admit she didn't know what the word meant). My close friend and co-Sunday School teacher, whose daughter went, along with another church member, whose son went, were able to afford this cost with no problem. Not a single one of my parents was. So I paid for their participation from my school's funds. Not one parent was able to get their child to the campus. Two parents, single moms, were working (one was at work when I picked her daughter up; another was on her way to work when I picked her child up). One parent said she needed a ride because her daughter couldn't take public transportation to the campus; she didn't even know that there's no city bus that goes to this suburb. So I borrowed a friend's Jeep, plus that friend borrowed her mother's van (we pitched in for gas), so that we could transport my four students, plus my friend's daughter, plus my daughter (who's handicapped - I couldn't get a sitter).

Now we're running up on more costs. Each student needed $30 as a deposit in case they lost their room keys. Nobody had it. And each student was told to bring $50 spending money for the week, since they'd go bowling a couple of times and do other on-campus outings. Parents gave what they had, which amounted to about $20 for their kid. I gave the rest out of pocket, but told the girls they'd have to pay me back when they got their stipend.

Now at each step of the way, these financial obstacles threatened these students' participation. Nobody can tell me that money is not a reason why people don't attend or why people drop out of college. And the financial piece was not a case of lack of parental support. Proof of support was that these students completed the entire application process to get accepted into this program, and their parents completed the appropriate paperwork in a timely fashion. And, for two of the parents who were there when I picked up the kids, the whole entire family stood on the porch to bid good-bye to their loved one for the week. You would've thought the girls were going to Iraq or something. So the moral support was there, but the financial support was not.

Of course I had to give my 'big speech' before we left the girls on campus last week. After we got them registered and settled into their rooms, and after we went to the local Walgreen's to get a few items they needed but didn't have (hangers, room freshener), I had my talk with these ladies. I told them they have been given a golden opportunity, and they needed to take full advantage of it. I told them that a lot of effort has gone into they're being here, so they need to conduct themselves in a way that shows respect for themselves first, then for their family, then for our school.

Because I had already noticed a certain look on one of my student's faces (she looked a little nervous and intimated, esp. when her roommate looked down her nose at her and filled the room w. her entire family and this student was all alone except peers and me), I added this:

I told my girls that there would be people there who were more prepared than them, but they shouldn't let that make them feel "less than" anyone; instead, they should just work harder. I told them there was a chance they'd be more prepared than someone, but they shouldn't let that make them feel "better than" anyone; instead, they should be humble and helpful. I told them they need to soak up and learn everything they can about business and about college this whole week -- and it doesn't matter if they aren't interested in business. I told them they were a family, so they'd better take care of one another. If one person has an iron, they all have an iron. If one person has a cell phone, they all have a cell phone. I told them not to let any of them be late for classes -- to wake each other up and make sure each one has what they need to have a successful week. "We know, Miss Caine; yes, Miss Caine," were their replies, but I think they got the message.

I think they're having a ball, since nobody called me at all this week. Not even when I left a message with their chaperone for them to call me and let me know how they were doing.

Today I go to their presentation of business plans, and awards ceremony, and then I take them back home.

I was reminded of when I went to college. My mother had to get someone to drive us from NJ to CT (we had no car), and I was literally dropped off. Then my mother and her ride sped off. No one was there to get me situated -- to help me find my room, tour the campus with me, make sure I had all the things I needed, whatever. But other parents did that for their kids. I realize my mom, who'd never been to college herself, was likely uncomfortable in what was a foreign experience.

I want to do everything I can to make sure kids in my school don't have the same obstacles I did. I am going to work with my counselor so that every student visits colleges several times a year, including overnight visits, and so that as many students as possible attend these summer college programs.

Why? Because exposure means so much. It ignites a passion for college. It builds comfort level with a new experience by taking some of the mystery and uncertainty and uneasiness out of it. It challenges students by letting them meet and work with youth their age from all over the country, showing them what 'college-prep' really looks like and showing them how far they have to grow academically and socially.

And a big THANKS to the Entrenuity staff (Brian Jenkins and Tiffany Staley) for making space for my kids to have EXPOSURE. I know their futures will be different because of this past week.

On My Heart

2008-07-07T05:11:00.002-05:00

Two different situations are on my heart this morning.

The first is the need to pray for two Christian families who've recently experienced the loss of loved ones in a very tragic, sudden way. Rev. Timothy Wright, Gospel singer and pastor of a COGIC church in Brooklyn, lost both his wife and grandson in a freak automobile accident this weekend. He's in critical condition himself. Someone was driving on the wrong side of the highway and hit them, and that driver died, too. This situation is so sad and really breaks my heart. I cannot imagine the pain this family must feel. It reminds me of a similar situation that occurred about a month or so ago. Steven Curtis Chapman, Christian Gospel singer, lost his five year-old daughter in a freak accident at his home. His teenaged son was backing an automobile out of the driveway and didn't see the precious little one, and struck her with the car and killed her. What's most ironic is that this little girl was one of two daughters that Steven and his wife adopted from China I believe, heeding the Lord's call to add to their birth children.

If these situations don't show that the godly are not exempt from tragedy, nothing will. Let's remember to "weep with those who weep" by joining our hearts with theirs in prayer to our heavenly Father, the God of all comfort, to be with these brothers and sisters in Christ in their time of need and sorrow.

The second situation is yet another example of how I feel like living as a Black person in America is like trying to swim to a shore and someone has put weights on your arms and cut your legs off. I feel like so much of American history as it relates to people of color is either not told, or is told so inaccurately that we don't have a strong sense of our accomplishments, nor do we have a clear idea of the history of injustice that our forefathers endured. Have you ever heard of something called Massive Resistance? Well, apparently, this week some Blacks were honored in VA for standing up and trying to integrate schools after the '54 Brown vs. Board of Education decision. The terrible part is that the state of VA launched an all-out war almost, a full-fledged campaign, to prevent that landmark decision from taking place. What was astonishing was that a lot of schools closed their doors rather than segregate, and the governor (who led this mess) enacted laws preventing schools that integrated from receiving State funds. What is most atrocious is that at one point an entire county (Prince George's, I believe) actually closed every single school in their county rather than integrate. Damn! Like Marvin Gaye said, "Makes me wanna holla, and throw up both my hands!"

Learning this angers me, but it also fills me with pride to see how far my people have come. Then when I hear Ralph Nader chiding Barack Obama for 'sounding white', I almost flip out again...

richard allem

"The River"

2008-06-24T21:42:00.003-05:00

In a musical world full of nonsense that passes as music, it was refreshing for me to stumble upon a treasure of a song. It's called "The River" and it's sung by newcomer Noel Gourdin.

Okay, so everybody's telling me this song's been out for a year(?) and asking me where I've been. Living in a cave called running a school is my answer. But seriously, this song's lyrics are powerful. It conjures up vivid images and warm feelings inside. And if you have roots in the South, you can instantly relate. Even if you don't, you can relate to the wistful theme of love lost. And brother man's voice is FIRE! Some say he reminds them of Anthony Hamilton or Jaheim. Humph! Really reminds me of the old school crooners back in the day -- the Eddie Kendricks and David Ruffins and such.

For the full experience, check out the video:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=Dy7iPhG7VT4

Or for the initially skeptical, here are the lyrics...

"The River", produced and written by Lady and a Tramp and sung by Noel Gourdin

Growin' up, it was tough
We were glad for what little we had
I saw my share of Old Fair, Mississippi, dirt roads, and Confederate flags
Everyday my father would tell me, “Son, run and don't never come back”
That's where I left my girl
That's where my heart is at, and ohh...

[Chorus]
I held my breath when they dipped my head
Then I came up shiny and new
Found out about love in the back of my Impala
Where they laid my grandfather too
Down by the river where black folks gather after Sunday service is through
How the river runs to the ocean, I'll be runnin' right back to you

I got along, I'm movin' on
I bandaged the scars up well
I think of her, then I sit and I wait
For a card or a letter in the mail
I walk the beach with the sand in my feet
Place my ear up to a shell
I wonder if you miss me too
Cuz I been longin' to get to you
I'm sick of starin' out my window sill
I'm tired of hopin' she remembers me still
I'm packin' my bags, I said I'm goin' back home
To the place where I belong
The river
And if she's there when I get there
I'm never gonna leave her again
You see, she stole my heart
Down by the river

[Chorus]

So I'm packin' up my suitcase
Bought me a one-way fare
I'm leavin' everything behind me
But in my heart I always care
And I'll still be right there (Thank you baby)
Cuz nothin' can replace that part in my life, and...

[Chorus]

Hip Hop Chef

2008-06-07T08:59:00.003-05:00

So it's 8:30am and TT is still asleep (yes, she's sick), and I'm watching... get this -- a cooking show! No, the world is not coming to an end. Yes, I feel okay. But for someone to get me to watch a cooking show, the host has to be interesting, and interesting this host is...

His name is G. Garvin, and he looks like a dark-skinned LL Cool J (ladies, get your minds right!). The name of the show is "Turn Up the Heat w. G. Garvin", and this 'hip hop chef', as I've dubbed him, is known to dress in a crisp button-down (w. sleeves rolled up so he can cook), while rocking a red turned-back baseball cap. Today he's wearing another button up, along w. black jeans and white 'kicks' (a.k.a. sneakers).

He speaks what comes naturally to him: a perfect blend of 'cooking lingo' and hip hop lingo. He refers to himself as 'ya boy' and cracks me up w. his 'know what I mean?' spoken as only true hip hop lovers can. He just said, "We're gonna watch this baby do what it do!" Now when was the last time you heard Emeril or Rachel Ray use this type of language?

G. Garvin is able to talk about the specific spices he uses, different kinds of cheese (Gruyere is the new one I learned, from the Switzerland town where it originated, which I learned from G. Garvin), and prosciutto (the Italian word for ham; I wondered what I was ordering from Wendy's when I ordered the sandwich w. this; I was just going by the picture!).

G. Garvin also takes us on field trips. Today he's at a restaurant in New Orleans, letting a female chef there teach us. One Saturday he took us to a South Side restaurant that also doubles as a famous culinary arts school (Washburne Culinary Arts Institute and Restaurant). This cool place is located in the South Shore Cultural Center, "a Chicago landmark and architectural treasure restored to preserve the original details of many areas" (taken from opentable.com).

Oh, right now G. Garvin has moved us to Cafe Reconcile, a restaurant that is also a training program for at-risk youth, ages 18-21 years old.

Can anybody see the 'hood commitment blended w. the cooking commitment?

So.... Why am I sharing all this? Is it just to let everybody know that part of me is starting to want to learn how to cook? Hecky-naw (to quote my friend D).

I brought this up to give a perfect example of what it is like to "contextualize" something -- in this case, contextualize cooking in a Black urban setting. G. Garvin has found a way to make cooking/culinary arts appealing to a specific group of people. His hip hop nature and love of the 'hood comes through clearly, even as he introduces the audience to high-end dishes.

As the Christian church thinks about what it might look like to be "missional" and to "contextualize" the Gospel, check out G. Garvin!

Wisdom

2008-03-20T16:34:00.002-05:00

Okay, so I went to the cleaners this past Monday, the first day of my 'working' spring vacation. I had a huge bag of clothes, as it's not often that I even get to go to the cleaners (doing laundry every week is enough of a challenge). When I do go, though, I always have a boat-load of clothes to be cleaned.

This is my regular cleaners, and putting 2 and 2 together, it became obvious to me that the white folks who own the cleaners are giving ownership over to an Asian family (an Asian woman was standing next to the white women who normally wait on me, learning what they do).

So, in addition to the clothes that need cleaning, there are 3 pairs of brand-new jeans that need to be hemmed. Usually I take them elsewhere to be hemmed, but to cut down on time, I did it all here. However, when the white women waiting on me told me they don't hem pants unless they clean them, too, I told them 'Never mind; I'll take the pants to be hemmed somewhere else and just pay my bill for the cleaning of my dress clothes." At my statement, the Asian woman held onto the 3 pairs of jeans and told me they'd hem them without cleaning them. What transpired was really interesting...

The white women insisted that the rule was to only hem pants if the customer paid to have them cleaned there, too. Politely, while trying to hurry with the rest of my order, the Asian woman told them, "It's okay; I take care of it," meaning she'd handle the exception. The white women's voices got louder, even saying there was no way to put in the computer hemming of pants without cleaning as well. Finally, the Asian woman, struggling over language, won the battle, getting the white women to use the old-fashioned way of receipting customers -- the duplicate copy receipt book -- so that I could receive the service desired.

Witnessing this long interchange, I admired the Asian woman's wisdom, though I felt sorry for her. Though her language and newness to that particular store's policy seemed lacking, she was really the smartest of the bunch. She saw what the two white women missed: the big picture. She saw the importance of making a small exception for a regular paying customer (who had a huge order) over dogmatically following the rules. Instantly I knew I'd return to the store, more often now than ever, because of this Asian woman's wisdom.

A Smile

2008-03-20T11:33:00.002-05:00

So I was on this flight home from New Orleans (work conference), sitting between this grouchy teenage-looking, bi-racial-looking young man on my right and this over-middle-age white woman on my left. So I started reading the many magazines I'd bought before boarding. The white woman had to use the bathroom at one point and, afraid of disturbing the obviously irritated young man (whose eyes were closed and whose earphones were on), she intimated that at some point in the flight she might have to get up. Annoyed at the young man's attitude, I volunteered to be the 'bad cop' and awaken him. In return, when she got back from the lav, the white woman struck up a conversation with me. She mostly talked; I mostly listened. And what she shared put a big smile on my face...

Turns out this woman was a Methodist from Reno, who'd spent the past week with around 30 or so of her church members, helping renovate three homes in N.O. This woman shared her experiences and seemed genuinely interested in helping out ordinary folks whose lives were devastated due to Katrina over 3 years ago. As if this wasn't enough good news to me, the woman then shared how amazed she was to find a total of about 600 Methodists from all over who'd volunteered their time as well. There were others, too -- the 20 college kids using their spring break to lend a hand, and the two Christian women from another denomination who relocated to N.O. to coordinate the volunteer efforts of the Reno woman and many others.

Well, I was simply amazed and ecstatic at how these people of God have 'stepped up' (sorry about the cliche) and heeded God's command, or better yet, reflected the heart of God, in aiding those in need. And without any fanfare or publicity or anything like that. Truly awesome! Though I am still saddened that it's three years after The Storm and folks are still not made whole in terms of living conditions, I am grateful for God's folks doing His work. And before we landed, this woman and I were talking about how wonderful it would be to bring a group of my school students to N.O. for a week in the summer..... Hmmm.....

Female Leadership

2008-03-02T23:09:00.002-06:00

Okay, so I've been thinking a lot lately about leadership, about how lonely and how hard it is, yet how absolutely critical it is to the success of any organization or group or enterprise. Both for myself and for work, I've renewed my focus on God and on my personal mission statement (the latter of which has a heavy leadership component). But I have been thinking about something (sorry for the rambling)...

Is there a gender bias with respect to what's acceptable in leadership? Do people accept a male leader who is firm and more autocratic than they do a female leader with the same qualities? Do people expect women leaders to be more nurturing and collaborative and such? Just some thoughts...

Is It Right?

2008-02-17T18:01:00.003-06:00

Okay, so I've just watched my second episode of "Celebrity Rehab" with Dr. Drew. I waver between feeling saddened and embarrassed for the has-been celebrities on the show, to identifying with the effects of addiction that these folks have wrecked on their families.

I've never been a reality show addict; in fact, I've only watched one relatively consistently (if, like 2 seasons count): Celebrity Apprentice. But all the other reality shows, esp. the ones that are auditions for jobs, pale in comparison to this one. Celebrity Rehab is like an audition for life, or for the rest of your life.

So, I've struggled as I've watched both episodes of this show, much like I struggled watching talk shows in their earlier days (before, incidentally, swearing them off): Is it right to have such a deep look into folks' personal lives, esp. as they're wrestling with their demons - not after they've won the battle?

Granted, Celebrity Rehab's no Jerry Springer or Maury (which I don't see how anyone in their right mind could watch). But it does smack of a bit of voyeurism to me. I dunno.

I wonder what other folks think...

Same Song, Different Verse: To JS

2007-12-30T13:39:00.000-06:00

Don't write much poetry, mainly 'cuz I suck at it. But was inspired to pen this joint while on vacation in N.C. last week....

"Same Song, Different Verse: To JS"

As I look into his eyes, cold, dark, and coffee brown,
I hear his whispering words, and begin to blank out the sound,
As he tells his sad old tale, my mind slowly rewinds
To my younger days, when life was a maze, and no peace could I find.

Hurt, Chaos, and Misery, these were my childhood friends,
Felt trapped, like I was gon’ snap, wondering, “Will this pain ever end?”
No way out of this hell called home, full of heartache and drama,
No Pops to provide and protect, not even a real Mama
To speak of, the real love came from brothers and sis
And a loving, caring Grandma, whose home seemed like bliss.

Spending weekends at Grandma’s was much-needed relief
From the violence and abuse faced day after day, week after week,
The punching and smacking, the screams and the shouts,
No heat, no new clothes, just learning to do without.
Night after night I cried, in my pillow I wept
Over so many lives so broken, so many promises unkept.
The fear and the turmoil slowly turned to anger, boiling hot
As my heart steadily grew colder, as I cursed my poor lot.

Years later, no more danger, but the effects I still feel
No immediate threat any longer, yet why does the pain seem so real?
New life, much less strife, thanks to God a lot’s gone well,
Yet my heart seems forever locked in this thick, protective shell.
Trust is hard, love is harder, the well of emotion has just run dry,
Tough outside, the real me I hide, finding it hard to even cry.
Friends try their best to come close, but there’s always this thick wall
Past which no one can venture, It’s really hard to give my all.

So when I hear his familiar story, my heart wells up with pure dread,
He’s walking my path, going where I’ve been, but I don’t like where the road heads.
Same aches, same pain, Will he ever be healed from this curse?
Why, Lord, is he forced to sing, the same song, different verse?

Copyright Joyce M. Caine © 2007

Taking A Break

2007-12-26T08:40:00.000-06:00

Thankfully this week has been a real breather from my very, very hectic life. I'm in North Carolina with my sister and daughter visiting relatives and just 'taking it easy'. It feels good to be able to sleep late (9am is late for me with TT), to not have an 'agenda' or a 'to-do list' for the day, to be able to enjoy long conversations and laughter, and just to 'take a break' from the fast pace of life. Weeks like this are very refreshing and they remind me of my need to incorporate 'little Sabbaths' into my schedule. In fact, I think that might be a resolution of mine for the New Year: to plan for at least one 'get-away time' per quarter -- a weekend even away from TT, the only thing that would have made this break completely restful (I love my little one, but caring for her does involve a measure of stress and being 'on' that a vacation without her doesn't).

I've actually had a chance to pull aside and get a little bit back on track with my times with the Lord. Been reading the Book of First Samuel and contrasting two different leaders -- Saul and David. Also, interestingly, I've been reading Carol Dweck's latest book called Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, which actually relates somewhat to Saul and David. Dweck's book is basically about how harmful a 'fixed mindset' is (the belief that talent is natural and either you have it or you don't) and how beneficial a 'growth mindset' is (the belief in human development -- the idea that you can always learn from your mistakes and failures, and you can grow and develop phenomenally with the right mindset). I can see the fixed mindset in Saul and the growth mindset in Samuel. :0) I am learning so much about myself and about my flaws as a leader, and areas where I can change and improve, through the Bible and Dweck (not that I'm equating Dweck with the Bible or minimizing Scripture, but you know what they say, "All truth is God's truth").

Anyway, I've also had a chance to listen to some of my favorite Bible teachers: Crawford Loritz out of Roswell, GA; John Piper out of Minnesota, I believe; and my all-time favorite, this Scottish dude who pastors a church in Cleveland -- Alistair Begg.

It's been really great catching up on life with my sister Jackie, and just having a chance to laugh with her and to also share God's goodness, as well as struggles and prayer requests. In one way, I'm kind of glad my whole family isn't here, because I think the more folks who are around sometimes, the more diluted the fellowship and intimacy become. Though I would have loved to hang with my brothers, neices and nephew, and of course my long-time friends Barbara Parker and Pam (and Pam's young-uns), it's good just to catch up with my sister in small doses and not have the pressure of being around a ton of folks. Maybe that's my true introverted self coming out again, I don't know.

Anyway, I am just blogging to say how thankful to the Lord I am for giving me this time of rest. It is very much needed, and it has already helped to re-focus and re-juvenate me in a lot of ways.

Peace.

What I'm Reading Now

2007-09-15T09:53:00.000-05:00

Eh, yo, I don't know where I find time to read; what I do's more like skim-reading. Anyhoo, I'm checkin' out two good books right now. Here they are:

1) Imperial Hubris: Why the West Is Losing the War on Terror, by Michael Scheuer - Pretty good book; this book was actually quoted by Bin Laden in his latest video release -- Worth checking out to see how some non-Westerners view the West (and why)

2) Influencer: The Power to Change Anything, by a whole gang of folks -- Interesting book on how to change people's behavior rather than just resigning oneself to problems

Family Reunion

2007-08-16T22:55:00.000-05:00

Earlier this week I was struck by something I heard a popular Black actor mention on a Christian TV program. The actor who played Uncle Phil on "Fresh Prince" was fondly recalling the wonderful upbringing given him by his mom, a single parent. He made the point that though Black families have their share of struggles, historically they have had strong family bonds despite tough circumstances. As an example, he shared how many of the 4 million freed slaves diligently searched for their families after Emancipation. Instantly my mind began to imagine what it must have been like for a husband, separated from his wife who was sold to another master in another place, to search for his beloved upon gaining freedom. I began to recall ads I'd seen that freed African Americans had placed to locate their children, their parents, and so on, with whom they'd lost contact due to the evils of slavery.

Personally, I cannot imagine the pain of separation, followed by the desperation of a search. The closest I could come to figuring out what this experience must've been like is thinking about what adopted adult children do to locate their birth parents. But even that tough situation does not scratch the surface of what my ancestors must have felt....

Now, I am certainly not one to blame another person for the woes of myself or my people. In fact, I think due to my upbringing, I err too much on the 'pull yourself up by your bootstraps' mentality. However, I cannot help but wonder if any of the problems that plague black families today are the residuals of our slavery past that ripped apart our family structures.

I am also filled with pride for my people, who managed, by God's grace, to survive such a holocaust as slavery. It is a testament to God's goodness that as a people, we were not completely wiped out physically, socially, emotionally, or spiritually.

The hope of those freed Blacks searching for their loved ones saddens me but also inspires me...

Fear, Sadness, and Outrage

2007-08-06T23:15:00.000-05:00

Tonight my heart is heavy at the fact that four Newark youth (three in college and one headed there in the fall) were shot execution style behind an elementary school. Three died and one is in critical condition. Their crime? Sitting on a bench listening to music. Robbery may have been a motive but authorities are not sure. What is clear is that these young people were not gang bangers, they were not drug dealers, they were not 'troubled youth', yet their lives were taken away in an instant because they live in a tough city.

Brick City. That's the latest nick name for Newark. It seems like the city in which I grew up is never in the news for anything positive, anything good. Everytime Newark makes the papers, it seems, some bad news is attached to it. But today's sad story was the worst I've ever heard of. And what makes the story so sad is the three murdered youth were all in college or on their way there in a few weeks. Thinking about their fate reminds me just how blessed I am to have 'made it out'. It reminds me again and again of how very dangerous many neighborhoods are for so many young people and children. It reminds me of how, in the city, you don't have to look for trouble; trouble finds you.

Though I haven't shed any tears, my heart cries for the victims, for their families and friends, their grieving loved ones. And my heart also aches for the perpetrators who have sunk so low as to be able to snuff out life so easily, who have gotten to the point where they can have such disregard for the sanctity of life.

Another emotion I feel right now is anger. I don't blame Newark's mayor Corey Booker. No, he is a young man who just took office a year ago and who is doing his best to steer a ship that is tossed about and almost broken up by a merciless wind and stormy sea. Part of my anger is at the ones who pulled the trigger. But another part of my anger is at those in this country who fail to see the need to seriously control the proliferation of guns. For the life of me, I cannot understand how, given the violent epidemic of gun killings in Newark and other cities (including my beloved Chicago where 34 youth were killed by gun fire in one school year), people can fail to see gun control as a vital issue in this country. I imagine if one's own community is not affected then one can become immune to the tragedy of it all. But, let's wake up, America. Yes, we must address the sins of the poor themselves that lead them to kill one another. But at the very same time, we must address the sins of the nation that put in the hands of the vulnerable the very weapons to do so.

More and more, issues of poverty are gaining significance for me. Gone are the days when my vote for a political candidate was determined by one or two issues: abortion, same sex marriage, blah blah blah. Those things are still important to me. But equally important are issues of poverty like gun control and inequities in education, health care, job access, etc. These are moral issues, too. These are life and death issues, too.

Wake up, America....

Supremacy of Christ in Post modern Culture

2007-07-01T23:37:00.000-05:00

Eh, yo, check out the link below for some awesome preaching on the supremacy of Christ in a postmodern culture. It is from John Piper's national pastors' conference (last year). Very accurately breaks down the challenge for today's ministers (and, heck, today's Christians) in the face of postmodern influences on the Church.

http://www.desiringgod.org/ResourceLibrary/ConferenceMessages/ByDate/1833_The_Supremacy_of_Christ_and_the_Church_in_a_Postmodern_World/

What I'm Reading Now

2007-07-01T07:29:00.000-05:00

Right now I'm reading The Rosenwald Schools of the American South, by Mary S. Hoffschwelle, 2006. Great look at the partnership between Booker T. Washington and Julius Rosenwald (who was responsible for Sears becoming a business success) to build over 5,000 schools for African-Americans at the turn of the century. Interesting look at the various forces at play in these ventures, from white philanthropists to Black local organizers to white officials in city and state education depts.

What was striking to me were the similarities bet. education reform in the early 1900s and education reform today: everything from the still unequal education that Blacks receive to the partnerships that have formed between school districts and philanthropists from the world of business to create new schools that will improve the quality of education for the poor in our cities. Another similarity was the complex dynamics between the vision and design of the funders and that of the community and the local leaders.

Some contrasts were evident as well, the most prominent being the lack of self help emphasis. Both in terms of the community mindset and in terms of the funders' requirements, what I found missing was the serious community accountability and involvement for the success of the schools being built. BTW and Rosenwald required communities to raise a certain amount of money before their donations even kicked in. In addition, they required measurable community support because they knew the success of the schools built would be dependent upon the involvement of the communities in which they were placed. I think today our philosophies about the ability of the poor to help themselves and about the political correctness of demanding accountability have hurt us tremendously. A final contrast is that the emphasis of the Rosenwald schools was on the physical plant, not on teacher training, curriculum, or other aspects of school reform that we are familiar with today.

Well, I am not yet finished with the book (about half way through), but I look forward to learning more about the process of getting over 5,000 schools built in about twenty, twenty five years, and about their legacy today. And my thinking is being sparked around what I can glean from BTW and Rosenwald's successes and challenges.

What's sad, though, is that almost one hundred years later, America is still trying to solve the problem of unequal education for its poor Black citizens....

PRAISES

2007-06-20T19:19:00.000-05:00

All praises due to the God of the Universe, the Most High God. Today while sitting in a great assessment/data workshop, a call came in on my cell phone. It was from Creative Mobility (aka The Bike Rack) in St. Charles, IL, the place I went to to customize TT's bike. I've been wanting to get Tamara an adaptive bike for quite a few years now (over four), mainly because TT loves doing three things: eating, swimming, and bike riding. I eat too much as is, I'm not getting into a bathing suit until I shed about a hunnerd pounds (not to mention that I can't swim to save my life), so that left bike riding. Though I can't ride a bike either, I can walk alongside T on her bike and get exercise while she enjoys herself.

Anyway, a bike adapted for TT's special needs costs $3,300. I'd all but given up hope on funding such a bike (after years of petitioning places for scholarships), when my sister J encouraged me to keep hope alive. I listened, and rec'd a $1,000 grant back in January or so. I combined that with my own $500, plus another 500 from J. I intended to use my income tax money for the rest, so I put a down payment at Creative Mobility. Unfortunately, for the first time since I've been paying taxes, I ended up owing Uncle Sam rather than getting a refund. I had to make that dreadful call to the bike shop telling them I wouldn't have their money when they'd have the bike (around March), and asking them to give me a couple of months to save up. Well, it's been almost two months and I haven't saved a penny. And then I get a call today...

The owner and his sister knew my situation, and they had a donor who recently asked to whom they could give a donation for a bike. The two folks thought of TT, and as of Saturday, T will have her new bike. Man, I was blown away by God's sovereignty and generosity. My little one will finally have a bike at home to enjoy on weeknights and weekends. We can finally do something enjoyable together.

Excitement

2007-06-16T00:40:00.000-05:00

Okay, so it is 12:40am (guess it's Saturday) and I am up revamping the tentative daily staff schedule to include two weekdays of extended day for staff development. Wow! My excitement about the start of the school year's really starting to build. And it's a good thing, too, because I have tons of work to do, many miles to go, before I sleep.

I am 'stoked' as they say about having our families come together and create our core values, and having our staff do the same and create our mission statement. I am so looking forward to the team building part of getting to know staff and finding out what their backgrounds and talents are, and where I need to bring them greater support. Many of my families have called me asking when we are meeting next and declaring their support and how excited they are as well. I know this is the honeymoon stage, but it's good to have a nice honeymoon....

I love the time spent with my AP because we are so much on the same page. I worry about being an experienced enough leader for her. I guess all I can do is be myself and lead the way I would want people to do me. And pray like young Solomon did for God's wisdom to lead the people entrusted to me. I love the teachers I have on board as well. I feel they complement each other well, they are good teachers (sound), and they have a love for students and families and are open to growing. I can't wait until next year when we have residents; I feel having teachers in training will add to the excitement and raise the bar of professionalism, though I think this group of staff are already professionals in every sense of the word.

Again, I know our flaws (mine included) will begin to show the more we are around each other, and I know that we will have our conflicts and our ups and downs, but I am really looking forward to this new school start. I believe the people, systems, structures, and support we have in place are all designed to bring to bear a tremendous PUSH for our students to succeed. I know as Sims puts it all the time, this thing is a marathon and not a sprint, but I believe we can look forward to some real gains this school year in our students HOLISTICALLY.

I'm gonna end with this Scripture from the Old Testament. I've been thinking about it a lot lately over the past two weeks. It was the basis for my personal mission statement when I was going through my stuff at Circle. I barely revisited it last year during my principal internship, but now it is resurrecting in my thoughts (coming back up in my spirit, as my charismatic, Pentecostal friends would say.) Here goes...

"Now these are the last words of David. David the son of Jesse declares, the man who was raised on high declares, the anointed of the God of Jacob, and the sweet psalmist of Israel:

The Spirit of the LORD spoke by me, and His word was on my tongue. The God of Israel said, the Rock of Israel spoke to me,

He who rules over men righteously, who rules in the fear of God, is as the light of the morning when the sun rises, a morning without clouds, when the tender grass springs out of the earth, through sunshine after rain.

Truly is not my house so with God? For He has made an everlasting covenant with me, ordered in all things, and secured; for all my salvation and all my desire, will He not indeed make it grow?"
--II Samuel 23:1 to 5

This passage is followed by a touching story of David's mighty men (the same ragamuffin crew that earlier in his leadership were in distress, in debt, and discontented - see I Samuel 22:1-2). At the end of his career, David had garnered such loyalty from his crew that when he was in the midst of battle, craving water from his city of Bethlehem, his men risked their lives to push through enemy lines and retrieve water for David from a well in his hometown. Even more poignant was David's response to these men's loyalty and care: David poured the water on the ground as an offering to God, refusing to drink the precious water for which his comrades risked their lives. What mutual care and protection! I aspire to be the kind of leader who inspires such motivated action and loyalty and care from those I lead.

Hence, my personal mission statement. Wanna hear it, here it go....

I want to live with God's glory* as the controlling desire of my heart.

I want to fully and mutually engage with loved ones (face to face/heart to heart), discovering what matters to them and working towards what's good for them.

I want to work with and manage people as God's agent, doing the best for them and inspiring the best from them.

I want to have a redeeming impact on others, helping to cultivate what God has placed in them.

*to express God's supreme worth and glorious nature and deeds to others, by word and deed

Akanksha

2007-06-09T03:57:00.000-05:00

This week I had the privilege of meeting and talking with Shaheen Mistri, a woman born in Mumbai, India (who lived in 13 countries growing up) who, at age 18, started a center for Indian children who are underserved by their country's public school system. Now about age 29, Shaheen has started over 50 of these centers, which run after school, parallel educational and social programs for children (from those entering school to those graduating from grade 10, their highest grade before two year college). I was struck by the similarities of issues faced by Shaheen and her team that face those of us in urban education in America, as well as a whole host of different conditions that make their job harder in many ways.

Shaheen visited many elementary and high schools during her visit here (AUSL and San Miguel elementary schools, plus quite a few charter middle and high schools, like Noble Street, Young Women's Leadership, and Perspectives). She participated in a roundtable of education leaders (with the likes of New Leaders for New Schools founder John Schnur, San Miguel founder Bro. Ed, Teach for America and IL Network of Charter Schools E.D.s, Joyce Fdn rep, charter school founders, plus principals like myself). I felt really out of my league, and I believe I gleaned just as much from Shaheen's visit than she did. What I took away in terms of inspiration and motivation for the work of providing quality education to traditionally underserved children and youth was invaluable. Observing what obstacles she faces compared to what we face, and yet how much progress she has made over the last decade, encourages me in the start of this new high school.

Here are some details:

India has a private school system that serves the elite (plus a couple of tiers of schooling like Catholic schools and very few public schools serving the wealthy) that function relatively well, but the public system serving the overwhelming majority of the public is challenged in terms of conditions and outcomes. Teacher quality is an issue, since teacher training is weak, teacher pay is low, people pursue teaching when they cannot do anything else so prof. prestige is low, and unions protect teachers (sound familiar?). This situation relegates poor children and families to cycles of poverty in their future since education, which could give them the means to change their social condition, is not as effective as it could be. Also, parents are largely uneducated, though enthusiastic about their children having a future (many volunteer at the centers). So the problems we see in American inner cities are not just American problems; they sound like class and city problems.

What's different than here (but actually similar in some respects) is that the undergrad programs that prepare teachers and the government that certifies them need significant work, plus about 70% of teachers are not even certified by government standards. There is not a single graduate program for principal training, so there is no leadership to recruit, select, and train teachers. Principals tend to be veteran teachers who may or may not have the ability or interest to lead a school, and in some cases the prinicpal might be a leader from another industry (like railway) who has no experience in instruction.

Another issue is facilities. School buildings need a great deal of work and often don't have adequate restrooms. Schools often consist of one or two rooms, and there may be 100 students in a class. Shaheen's organization, which cannot afford better or even separate school facilities, uses schools for free after school lets out (2 to 6pm).

In terms of results, Shaheen's teachers have made great strides comparatively but, like great cultural changers, they are not satisfied because the work is still great. In India, there is primary school (grades 1 to 5), followed by grades 6 to 10, after which you take a major test to determine eligibility for a two year college. Your performance in the two year college decides if you go to the three year college, so kids have a 15 year educational program if they are fortunate. There are teachers in the system who have gone only to grade 5. Only 10% of student make it to grade 10, whereas 65% of students in Shaheen's program attend the two year college. Some have even graduated and returned as teachers in the program, which is really exciting. In addition, other results abound, like the hope children are given for the future, the spirit of volunteerism and service that are instilled in so many of the kids there, and the holistic growth of the students.

In addition to trying to figure out how to recruit and train high quality teachers, Shaheen's group is struggling with how to expand. Whether or not or how much to join govt schools in some way is a question, as well as how to replicate what they are doing without losing the level of quality they have.

Hearing Shaheen share challenges, successes, and the resilience of the Indian children and families was tremendously encouraging, and reminded me of the situation of my African brothers and sisters in their country. I was also deeply saddened and sobered regarding obstacles the poor face everywhere, not just in America. But more than anything, I was emboldened that the work I do here of working to create real futures for urban minority youth through a strong academic and social-emotional foundation is truly needed and a worthwhile goal. It helps to know there are folks doing the same thing in very different cultures.

You can check out Shaheen's organization at akanksha.org. Peace.

DA T.R.U.T.H. and Friends Live

2007-06-02T20:13:00.000-05:00

Just a word about the new Truth DVD (title above). It's off the chain! Just ordered it online this week and watched it yesterday, and it was awesome. It was taped at the last IMPACT Conference, and it features Da T.R.U.T.H. (rappin' w. a live band). Just a wonderful time of hip hop worship!

Guest appearances by Trip Lee, Flame, Ambassador, and CM really round out this dynamic DVD. I was encouraged, too, by the fact that CM has successfully made Bible centered, Christ centric hip hop a staple now, having passed the baton on to Truth, Trip Lee, Flame, and others. Not only that but it's powerful seeing and hearing these godly young men rap about God, putting the Lord on a pedestal, and living lives that testify to God's awesome power and grace!

Only one question: Where are the strong Christian FEMALE emcees?

I have a 19 year old special needs daughter who has multiple challenges (non verbal, developmentally delayed, incontinent, physical anomalies in fingers and hands, and so on). I tell her jokingly a lot what I want her to be when she 'grows up': a Christian female emcee. Now I've taken to telling her that in heaven I want to see her rock the mic for Jesus, and I'll be in the audience nodding my head. :-) I would love to see some daughters of Abraham, so to speak, who can flow with the same skill yet the same biblical soundness as the brothers above....

Two Is Better Than One

2007-05-30T19:20:00.001-05:00

Okay, so I am a certified introvert. Could probably win the Couch Potato Award of the Year. My idea of a lovely Sunday afternoon is coming home from church, sitting on the couch with lunch, and watching a Columbo episode. Better yet, follow that up with a Law and Order marathon.

My sister gave me an official diagnosis years ago when we lived together (we lived together for nine years when I first graduated from college). She told me that when it comes to her, she derives energy from being around people. She is motivated and feels most alive when she is in the company of others. Occasionally she needs a break and will take a respite, 'shutting herself in' as she calls it. But not too much of that, or she will go crazy. I, on the other hand, am the opposite. Being by myself alone with my thoughts energizes me. Being with people drains me. I can take some of it for a while, but then I must go off and fill myself from the well of solitude.

Funny, then, how alive I felt today when I spent time 'collaborating' with my new co worker, an assistant principal who just came on board. We walked through our new building, looking at possibilities, at what can be, in that space to motivate students. We shared ideas about school routines that will build positive culture. And we planned great things for tomorrow's family meeting. Wow! When we share like that, time seems to fly. We even shared tales of sexual discrimination, how at times our leadership is not taken as seriously by people (men), and we have to prove we are not sex objects. (The last topic of conversation resulted from earlier that day when I introduced her to a staff person, who said, "Wow, we have some young meat coming on board." Can you believe that? And this is 2007.) We also discussed potential bumps in the road we see down the line, but resolved to work, together, for our students' good.

The Bible says that 'two are better than one, for they have greater reward for their labor' (somewhere in Ecclesiastes). I believe it was Solomon who noted the warmth that comes from having a thought partner, and the practicality as well (the 'greater reward' mentioned earlier, plus the support when one of you is down).

This week in my quiet times I've been studying the life of Daniel, and I'm reminded today that he had three friends his age (Shad, Mesh, and Abed). I'm sure having their support made it easier for him to stand tall in a culture that was very foreign to him.

As collaborative as I like to think I am, I really do prefer the company of myself (natural bent). But even I, introvert exhibit A, am enriched tremendously when I have a partner in the game.

Good Movie

2007-05-28T19:30:00.000-05:00

Okay, so I went away for like a day to get some rest and stuff, and I watched a good movie at this hotel. The name of the movie is "Breach" and it was starring Ryan Philippe (not one of my favorite actors, but he does a pretty decent job in this pic). I forgot the name of the dude who plays Philippe's emissary, but he was good, too, as was the female FBI leader (she's played in tons of stuff, but she's the kinda actress where no one really remembers her name -- only her face).

Anyway, what was interesting was the movie was based on a true story. (After I watched it, I googled the story and listened to an NPR interview with Eric O'Neill, the real FBI wanna be or upstart who took down Robert Hanssen, real life American spy.) It's about this young guy who's interested in becoming an FBI agent, and he's given a tough case that will determine whether he makes it into the agency or not. The test is to take down this spy, who has been an FBI agent for a very long time and who is mad intelligent. As an aside (and this part is true, too) this spy is a sexual deviant who videotapes having sex with his wife and sends it to people w.o her permission. Ironically, he's also a devout Catholic.

Of course, I loved the young upstart trying to prove himself theme, and the proving himself opposite the older, wicked so-called boss was even more interesting to me. So was the rookie's challenge of figuring out if he had what it took to be an agent (some moments of self doubt, combined with struggles over whether or not to trust his superior, resonated w. me, as did his boss's combination flawed personality and vulnerability emotionally). What also tripped me out was that most of this movie was really true. Unlike tons of movies that are loosely based on true stories, this one stuck to the facts mostly (just google Hanssen and O'Neill, and you'll see).

Finally, reading about Hanssen was pretty sad -- hearing how many lives he compromised by selling U.S. secrets. And, hearing that he may have given info that helped bin Laden w. 9/11. Interesting, this world of spies, that is. Makes me wonder what makes a person a traitor. Hmmmm.....

Spades

2007-05-23T09:09:00.000-05:00

Hiring staff is like playing spades. You have a limited number of options, and what cards you select depend upon a variety of factors: how strong the suit or number is in relation to other cards, in what order you can play the cards to make the most possible books, and so on. Finding the right folks for your team is pretty complex. It's more than just what hard skills the person has, though that's the minimum requirement. It's also what that person brings to the table outside of those hard skills: coachability, willingness to work as a team player with other staff, heart for students, and other expertise or background. Plus, it's how that person fits into the existing team -- what they might add or detract in terms of diversity, team spirit, stability, etc. And you have to find people who are not just good for kids, but who are good for adults, too, since working with kids is only part of the job. And there's no perfect candidate. You have to balance the candidate's needs with those of others, weighing how much you're really able to invest in them and if they can help you mold others. You also have to have a vision for where you want the school to go long-term, and if that person can help you get there. Man, this stuff is hard!

Education Funding - Part II

2007-05-13T06:53:00.000-05:00

Here are some one-page summaries of the proposed legislation to improve the way public education is funded in IL (proposed by Emil Jones and Gov. Blagojevich).

http://www.ieanea.org/resources/28/Tax%20Fairness%20Plan/Understanding_the_Tax_Fairness_Plan.PDF

and...

http://www.ieanea.org/resources/28/Tax%20Fairness%20Plan/Education%20and%20the%20Tax%20Fairness%20Plan%20faq.pdf

Here's a summary of similar legislation, HB/SB 750, another plan to reform public education funding, this time through increasing income tax and sales tax.

http://www.ctbaonline.org/New_Folder/Education/Fact_Sheet_750_Package_3-2007.pdf

http://64.233.167.104/search?q=cache:7kjXMugJL2gJ:www.workwelfareandfamilies.org/PDF/Fact_Sheet_750_FastFacts.pdf+hb/sb+750&hl=en&ct=clnk&cd=4&gl=us

Education Funding

2007-05-13T06:24:00.000-05:00

With IL legislators deliberating on alternative means of funding public education, I was struck by this recent article in the New York Times Magazine.

http://www.nytimes.com/2007/05/12/education/12middle.html?ex=1179633600&en=b11db2c011747c17&ei=5070&emc=eta1

This article is about an East Coast public middle school that could serve as a model for educating youngsters in this difficult transition period. The school's creative curriculum, along with its intentional approach to social and emotional learning, were interesting.

What was striking, though, was the almost $25,000 per pupil the school has to spend. Because I just finished budget for my school for next year, I couldn't help but note that amount is over three times the amount we spend per pupil in Chicago (almost $7K per pupil for high school, and even less for grades K-8).

I know money is not the only factor in effectively educating students, but it certainly does make a difference. When administrators have to feverishly seek grants (additional funding) to provide
basics (like extra staff to tutor students who struggle severely or an assistant principal when the school is small or a counselor for every grade or a social worker or money for the social-emotional programs this East Coast school has), it is frustrating to see other schools for whom these matters are not an issue. When I talk to principal friends who are more than capable and willing to provide ongoing, quality staff development, but who lack the funding to do so, I almost want to cry because the bottom line is students being shortchanged on their education -- on their future.

I firmly believe students from low-income areas can achieve at the highest levels when certain conditions are set by the adults around them: high expectations, laser-like focus on learning, ongoing use of data, commitment to teacher development, and so on. Doing so requires creativity with use of finances, dogged pursuit of outside resources, and so on. For instance, in order for my school to run as it should, I have three additional streams of revenue outside the city's per pupil spending: two grants and the financial support of our non-profit operator.

However, educating poor students always will be an uphill battle until the issue of funding is settled in this country -- until there is equity in spending per pupil.

Grandma

2007-05-06T21:17:00.000-05:00

I was just thinking about how many good memories I have with my grandma (mother's mom). Grandma Nola, who's 82 years old, is responsible for probably most of the good memories I have from childhood. With the chaotic home we were raised in, going to Grandma and Grandpa's almost every weekend was a welcome respite. Grandma was the one who took time to play with us -- the board game Trouble was a favorite of ours, as was Chinese checkers. Laying in Grandma's big bed, watching Carol Burnett or the Mary Tyler Moore show, was pure heaven to us. So was going downtown to McCrory's or Woolworth's, five and dime stores, every Saturday. My grandmother taught us how to wash and fold clothes and how to clean a house, teaching us lessons within the lessons, like how important it is to do your best the first time around, and it will save you from having to go back and do the job again. As simple as she was, Grandma was affirming with her words more than with her touch. If we didn't reach a goal, she would always tell us that all God asks us to do is our best, and since that satisfies Him, forget everybody else. Grandma never raised her hand to hit us not once -- though her 'shame, shame, shame', her way of expressing extreme disappointment at something we'd done, hurt like blows (wasn't often that we heard those words, though). I think my grandma also helped pass on a love of reading to us as well. Her "True Story" magazine and "Harlequin Romance" novels, not the best literature out there, were always around in huge numbers. Other good times we had were raiding Grandma Nola's jewelry drawer and trying on her costume jewelry. We fell out laughing one time when we ran across her 'falsies'! I really love my Grandma, because she showed a little girl love consistently, and her home was a veritable haven, a port in the storm, growing up the way we did.

Why Conservatives Have a Bad Rep

2007-05-06T19:41:00.000-05:00

Check out this op-ed piece by Pat Buchanan, written in response to the V-Tech tragedy.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/uc/20070501/cm_uc_crpbux/op_332611;_ylt=AgYByL15Nro67Qa_20z.tCLq188F

Then, check out this response by author Kathy Kang, called "Resident Alien".
http://morethanservingtea.blogspot.com/

Can anyone see why conservatives have a bad rep?

Though I proudly call myself a conservative, a Christian, and an evangelical, I can understand why some believers shy away from those terms. Buchanan (insensitive conservative Catholic), Newt Gingrich (who felt the VTech tragedy would not have happened if people bore arms), and Pat Robertson (who called for Venezuelan Prez Hugo Chavez' assassination and who said Israeli PM Ariel Sharon's stroke was God's punishment for his Gaza withdrawal) all portray us in a negative light. And it's time we disassociated ourselves firmly from them in order to preserve a biblical, godly image of what it means to be a follower of Christ.

Chris Rock

2007-05-05T20:20:00.000-05:00

Okay, so I'm slow when it comes to seeing popular movies. I don't really recommend Chris Rock's "Never Scared". Someone loaned it to me about a month ago, and I haven't been able to make it through the DVD due to the profanity. But....

Chris Rock said something funny about America. After saying repeatedly that America's the greatest country in the world, even for Blacks, he said this:

We Black Americans should be grateful to be here, but we have to be a little leery about being here. America is like that uncle that paid your way through college, but molested you. Pretty deep. Comedy's powerful.

Musings on Community Development

2007-05-05T19:16:00.000-05:00

Today's BUILD was pretty cool. We visited the Lawndale Christian Health Center, a place I've often passed by but never stopped into. (Sorry for ending a sentence with a preposition.) Bruce Miller, COO and CFO of the center, gave us a talk about how LCHC got started, what it provides for the community, what principles it's based on, and so forth. Really well-done, informative, and open discussion about the opportunities and challenges of the work they do.

Three thinking points surfaced for me today as we sat around the table with Bruce.

The first is a question Bruce posed to us, which is one I wrestle with all the time. The question went something like, In order to change a community, is access to quality healthcare alone the whole solution? Of course not was my response. Though having a solid clinic and pharmacy with caring, competent medical professionals is certainly necessary, it is insufficient. Especially, in light of data Bruce shared about smoking habits (and the effect on children with asthma) and eating/exercise habits (and the diabetes and other conditions that result) in poor neighborhoods. These practices can only be treated -- not eliminated -- by external resources. Bruce used the data to show why LCHC needs Lawndale Church -- why it would be insufficient for the health ministry to function in an isolated way. I agree. But this matter also got me thinking about how (almost) every area of change for a community requires the community members' themselves to change -- be it education, housing (spending/savings habits), or whatever. I know this is a tough thing to think about because we don't want to go to the other extreme of blaming the victim. But I can't help but think how if we don't get this piece of the puzzle right, then we will not have the impact we can in terms of transforming or redeeming individuals, let alone a community.

Second matter. We were posed with the question of how an org. like LCDC / LCHC remains Christian while providing services for which they receive government funds. Orgs like the Y, the Salvation Army, and Christian hospitals, which have clear Christian roots but which are not particularly Christian today, were given as examples. I think this is an interesting question, esp. given how easy it is to be concerned about a cause (like social justice or health care or housing) that how you address that cause becomes a lesser priority (i.e., do we really need Christian workers in our clinic, or do we just need good people?; isn't the main thing to provide a quality service?; who cares, as long as we do it in a 'good' way?). The fact that this Lawndale guy even asked this question was impressive to me, because I think sometimes when trying to be relevant to our culture and to meet its needs, it's all too easy to lose your Christian distinctive. And when that's done, of course you can still provide a service, but it's certainly not the same. Having your doctor treat your illness and pray for you is a double blessing. And there just might be a slippery slope that starts when the distinctive's lost. On the flip side, though, I've been in a situation where the Christianity was heightened and the service provided was mediocre (or sub-par, even). In that case, I found myself wanting the service to be good even at the expense of the Christianity being gone. (ex: Who wants to go to a Christian doctor who's nice but whose medical care is so poor, you're worse off health-wise?) This is an important issue for which there are no easy answers.

Which brings me to the final point. I'm noticing a pattern. Those who embrace relocation to the city -- and who insist that this is the best and perhaps only really effective way to minister in the 'hood -- seem to have a line over which they won't cross. And that line is relocating their own kids into the local schools. I have yet to meet someone who has sent their own kids to the local schools, and I certainly understand the reasons. (And I write this knowing I'd likely do the same thing myself with my own child.) It's interesting, though, to know that there are limits to relocation. There are some points where people hold back. Will people live on the same block? Yes. Will they go to the same church? Yep. Will they use the same clinic? Definitely. Will they send their kids to the same school? Nope. Either they'll homeschool or they'll send their kids to a Christian school in the hood (or to a magnet school/charter outside of the community). I completely understand the reasons why. I don't think I would sacrifice my own child's future or safety myself. But, I think the same logic that's applied to other aspects of community living (you don't have the same level of investment if you're not present) should be applied to public education. I think if it were, we'd see a massive change in the quality of schooling. I guess everyone feels that sacrifice is too great to make, though.

More Than Serving Tea

2007-05-03T04:50:00.000-05:00

Sukhan Wong. Jeannie Chan-Yee. Yale and Yale Christian Fellowship. Filipino mom in Bahrain. Cindy Yoon. Judson Baptist Church.

These all point to contact I've had with folks of Asian descent. I must admit that my experiences have been very limited (Sukhan was the only Asian person in my almost all Black high school and, though my college and Christian college group had more Asians than Blacks, I did not go out of my way to pursue friendships with folks in this group, even though they seemed more 'real' to me than white Christians). The closest relationship with anyone Asian I've had was with Jeannie Chan, one of my college suitemates, fellow believer and now an adjunct at Fuller, but even that friendship had its limits.

Lately different high profile incidents have thrust the Asian community into the news more, making them the topic of conversation a lot. The VA Tech tragedy, in which a Korean-American went on a killing spree at an American university campus, has everyone talking about the burden racial minorities in this country feel when one of their own commits a crime. Also, a look into the shooter's background revealed a college student full of rage, caused by mental illness but also sparked by a pattern of ridicule and alienation growing up, due to his race. In progressive Christian circles, the Youth Specialties incident, where Christian publishers printed (but later retracted and publicly apologized for!) VBS materials that were racist towards folks of Chinese background, was a topic of conversation not too long ago. In both cases, unfortunate incidents have helped bring to light the reality of being an Asian-American in this country. More Than Serving Tea, an anthology of Asian American women's writing on topics like expectations, relationships, leadership, and faith, continues to give insight on what it's like for Asian-American Christian women, in particular, who live in two cultures and have a triple challenge: being Christian, being Asian-American, and being women.

Though there are obviously differences between my upbringing and experiences as a Black Christian woman, I was surprised at how much of this book resonates with me. It was funny to hear authors write about how Asian-Americans root for entertainers and athletes who are from their background, and how they feel deeply the disappointment and shame when someone who's Asian fails in some way. Blacks do the same thing. It was interesting to hear how certain Asian cultural behaviors (like submissiveness to authority in some-not all-Asian groups) have negative ramifications for the work place. Some African-Americans, raised to respect authority, have to learn to become comfortable with 'pushing back' and expressing dissent (in a positive way), something that whites and others do naturally because of how they were raised. Though not to the same degree, I could identify with the hierarchal family structure (many Black churches still tend to be run by Black men, esp. in the South and Midwest, and many more Black families than white ones are complementarian rather than egalitarian), with the sense of loyalty to community that exists in my culture, too, and with the restraint from showing emotions that has become synonymous with being a 'strong Black woman'.

What's neat about this book is that the authors point out these challenges, but not in a spirit of anger or resentment. They do so in the spirit of Christ: naming what has made their road tough, but then going to God and His Word to help interpret their experiences. So the result is a gratitude to God for the cultures in which they were born (warts and all), a worship of the God who values them as His creation (apart from performance or race/ethnicity or gender), and a wise affirmation of the gifts of their culture yet a sensible pushing aside of anything in their culture that does not affirm their biblical worth and that does not lead them to the peace, love, and joy that Christ brings.

Can you tell I like this book? I think it's a must-read for all folks -- Christian and non-Christian, male and female, Asian or non-Asian. And the authors are: Nikkie A. Toyama and Tracey Gee (editors), Kathy Kang, Christie Heller de Leon, and Asifa Dean (contributors), and Jeanette Yep (consulting editor).

Peace.

Good Night

2007-04-25T22:40:00.000-05:00

Tonight was a good night. Though I wasn't particularly excited about the evening at first, particularly after a long day's work, I actually did something I haven't done in a long time: had an enjoyable night out.

So my boss, my big boss, offers me some tickets to see the Joffrey Ballet. I recognize the big name, but am not super thrilled. After all, the one and only time I've ever been to a ballet was a fiasco: My sister bought tickets for my mom (Mother's Day), all of us siblings, and her best friend Angie who was in town. We went to NYC, ate a big dinner at fine restaurant, and then went to the Alvin Ailey dance performance. Maybe it was the food, maybe it was the orchestra- like music, but most of us fell asleep, and my sister was pissed. So let's say ballet and I don't have that great a relationship.

What made the evening a little more interesting was a friend's suggestion to take a former middle school student who is a high school junior now and who loves ballet. Great idea, I thought, esp. since it'd give us a chance to catch up. Jennifer was excited, but I still wasn't. I thought the evening would be ultra boring.

From the opening movement, the evening was really a beautiful one. Enthralling, engaging, amazing, funny, lovely -- all describe the dancers and their moves, the lighting, even the music. I actually enjoyed the whole performance. And, of course, Jennifer and I had a chance to find out what's been happening in one another's lives, and that was just as fun, too.

And I made it home by 10:30. What a good night.

Irresponsible Parents

2007-04-22T22:31:00.000-05:00

Okay, so I've been trippin' lately over the huge responsibility parents have raising their kids and how it is so easy to mess up when it comes to child-rearing. Parents are human, and there's no rule book on parenting that we can follow, so a lot is learned through trial and error. One thing that's needed, though, is a willingness on the part of parents to admit their mistakes and not to act like they are the child (self-centered). Three recent celebrity situations come to mind when I think about this topic.

One is the atrocious voice mail that actor Alec Baldwin left for his 11 year-old daughter recently. What's even sadder is that when I played the clip for a friend, this person did not see anything wrong with Baldwin's ranting. The clip can be heard here:
http://www.tmz.com/2007/04/19/alec-baldwins-threatening-message-to-daughter/
This person said we don't know what the little girl did, and the problem with (white) kids today is that their parents don't discipline them, but let them do what they want. This person (who is Black) then said Baldwin talked to his daughter the way Black parents talk to their children all the time. She's right, but it's still sad. Nothing Baldwin's daughter did warrants her father's degrading, anger-filled comments.

The second is a blog entry by D-Nice, former hip hop artist of the '80s. D-Nice opens up and shares details of the pain caused by his absentee father:
http://www.d-nice.com/journal/archives/000095.php

The last is a reality show called "I Married A Baller" that I stumbled upon this weekend. One of the members of a female R&B group from the '90s married this retired football player named Eddie George, and their family activities are featured in this reality show, kind of like Run's House. Well, Eddie George's father was rarely there for him growing up but this hasn't stopped this football hero from pursuing a relationship with his dad today. He goes out of his way to invite his dad to spend time with his family, even to attend big events like his induction into the Hall of Fame. And all of this despite the fact that his dad is still struggling with drug addiction and is very uncomfortable and 'fidgety' at these gatherings. Part of Eddie George's relationship with his dad is sweet, seeing him play the role of the adult and forgive his father and try to give his father what his father didn't give him. Another part strikes me as enabling, though, and as something that should not have to be.

D-Nice and Eddie George both have made very different choices when it comes to dealing with their irresponsible fathers, and I can't say who's right and who's wrong. All I can do is mourn the fact that there are thousands of others like them -- adults struggling to deal with the wounds of parents who act(ed) more like kids than adults.

VA Tech Tragedy

2007-04-18T06:28:00.000-05:00

My heart goes out to all those affected personally by this tragedy. I am praying and grieving with the victims' loved ones, though I know the sadness I feel is nothing compared to what they are going through.

Great shock, sadness, then anger about how easy it is to get a gun, then compassion even for the gunman (who was obviously mentally ill) were some of my initial feelings. Purposely I avoided watching too much coverage of this incident because, sadly, I did not want to feel deeply the pain and heartache I knew I would feel hearing details. Just this morning I watched the clip below my cousin sent me, and I cried.

http://cosmos.bcst.yahoo.com/ver/225/popup/index.php?cl=2418838

Just want to encourage folks to let yourselves 'feel' in this situation, and maybe it will prompt you to pray for victims' families, even for the victim himself, and vote for legislation making it more difficult to get ahold of guns, as well as for policies that serve the mentally ill.

BUILD - Part Two

2007-04-17T22:02:00.000-05:00

Okay, so it's been a minute since the first part of this blog, but things have been kinda busy (starting a new high school, from scratch, is no joke!). Anyway, here's an update on the rest of last week's BUILD conversation that had me a bit jazzed...

Our group's conversation about community, and about whether or not you can be effective in urban ministry without relocating to the community, somehow got onto the subject of home ownership. I think one guy noted how young singles with no families sometimes buy expensive condos in one community, flip them, and then do the same thing in another community, without any consideration for how they've helped destabilize those neighborhoods (i.e., effects of gentrification). As a group we really struggled with how you improve conditions in a community without displacing folks (I think Mary Nelson talked about development without displacement the way Lupton speaks of gentrification with justice). Personally, this is an area I think all of us would like more time devoted to. Anyway, one group member (young well meaning white man) tried to make the point that home ownership is greatly overrated, and it's actually a good idea to encourage families in the 'hood to rent rather than own a home.

Well, I was really jazzed because we all know that owning property is one of the best ways to stabilize a family and a community (I'm not talking about a poor family owning a home when they aren't ready; nor am I talking about buying more home than you can afford.) I find it irresponsible to encourage working class poor to pay month after month of high rent on someone else's property, rather than pay that same money on something they will eventually own, not to mention something they can rent partially (to help pay the mortgage and/or to go towards rainy day and college and retirement savings, and to get a tax refund for annually in the meantime). The young man's point about upkeep of a home being a cost some folks don't consider before buying was well taken, but it assumed I am for going out and telling every poor person on the West side to buy a home, indiscriminately. I am in favor of working class families getting themselves in financial order and working towards that goal sooner rather than later (or not at all, which is most often the case).

Okay, another Black woman added that families who own homes in the neighborhood have a greater investment there, which this white young man refuted and couldn't understand. I pointed out how owning a home in a community does make you more concerned about litter, trash, garbage pick-up, crime, even the schools, because all of that affects not just your property value, but your quality of life. (Kind of like the point this same person made earlier about how living in the community you serve gives you a greater sense of urgency about it than living in another area of the same city!) When you are renting and bouncing from place to place, you are still concerned, but not to the same degree. Why? Because you are not invested to the same degree. Also, I noted that home ownership decreases students' mobility rate, a real problem for teachers. I know principals who bemoan the fact that their schools have mobility rates as high as 60 or 70%. Every study shows constant mobility does nothing but disrupt a child's education, social support structures, etc., undermining the learning and socialization process.

Another white gentleman responded that Jesus was homeless, and that we should go back to Acts 2. That struck me as being funny. Jesus was not rich, that much I do know, contrary to TV evangelists (His parents offered a dove and pigeon when He was born, rather than the lamb or cattle of non-poor families). But, many of Jesus' women followers had money, so much so that they supported Him from their substance. Not only that, but there were rich disciples (Joseph of Arimathea, as one of the fellas pointed out). And the Gospel hit Ceasar's household as well as his servants -- it converted Onesimus the runaway slave as well as Philemon his master.

Another response was how Jesus said don't store up treasures on earth. Okay, so was He talking about not having money, or money not having you? The latter. The Book of Proverbs speaks of a wise man leaving an inheritance for his children's children. And Jesus had a problem with the rich man because 1) he ignored Lazarus, the poor man; and 2) he left God out of his existence, living a self-led life marked by "I"s and evidenced by tons of preparation for his earthly life but no preparation for his spiritual life or for his after-life. Lastly, the NT addresses poor Christians and rich Christians (those who are rich in this world), telling the latter not to put their trust in uncertain riches and to remember the poor. Those passages tell me there will be rich and poor Christians -- everybody won't be on the same level.

The Book of Acts was history -- not a prescription. It gives us principles to live by -- not a blueprint (otherwise, we'd all be speaking in tongues like at Pentecost). Plus, the Acts 2 believers lived communally because when they became followers of Christ, many of them were persecuted (lost property, which included their homes -- check out the Book of Hebrews). So, the early church responded to an immediate need for large numbers of converted folks to have a place to live (i.e., the folks who were at Pentecost were in Jerusalem for this feast, and when they were converted, they were far away from home; later, the persecution kicked in). When you look at the church not too later, you realize folks had homes (people were praying in Peter's mother in law's home, I believe, when Peter was in prison; the apostle John warns Christians not to receive traveling false teachers into their homes; and there were even house churches -- all of which tell you folks had personal property; communal living was not long term).

I certainly agree with the fellas desire to purge American Christianity of our materialism and individualism and our tendency to, as one young white brother said, find our identity in our homes. I feel too much of today's Christianity is really white American, Western Christianity and modern philosophy in disguise (which is how you can have a prosperity gospel and how you can have politics that assume America's right since we are a 'Christian nation' -- also funny to me). However, I don't think the solution is some romantic fantasy of communal living. I think you'll find just as much sin on the commune as you will outside of it (ask Ananias and Sapphira). I think the solution lies in a return to Scripture's counsel (let's re-examine God's Word to hear His concern for the poor and His admonitions to the wealthy, and then let's live those out, and we'll be straight). People unwisely find their identities in all kinds of things -- their jobs, their loved ones, even their ministries -- but we don't advocate the elimination of those things. Instead, we support putting them in proper perspective.

Lastly, I think this situation is a prime example of the divide between white and Black Christians. Just as it was incomprehensible to me to suggest to working class poor Black folks not to pursue home ownership, my perspective was equally unfathomable to my white brothers. I think personal experience, based on race and class (as well as personal beliefs or theology) created the gap in understanding. As I stated, I know what it's like to have a mother who's almost 60, who has worked at the same job for 32 years, yet who does not have a home and does not have any retirement savings at all, and for whom retirement is nowhere in sight. Once my mother gets too old or too sick to work (which we thought was a couple of years ago with hip surgery), she will not be able to live off Social Security. By God's grace, what will keep her from being a Breakthrough client is the fact that she has adult children who can and will take her in and care for her and support her. Many people don't have that. And, as a single mother with a multiply-handicapped child whom I will care for for the rest of her life, I cannot afford to be as unwise as my hard-working mother. I must have a home and retirement savings because I have no daughter to care for me in my old age.

Two Good Books

2007-04-15T03:38:00.000-05:00

Right now I am reading two good books:

1) Juan Williams's Enough: The Phony Leaders, Dead-End Movements, and Culture of Failure That Are Undermining Black America -- and What We Can Do About It; and

2) Mary Pattillo's Black on the Block: The Politics of Race and Class in the City

Juan Williams is a political analyst for Fox News and a panelist on Fox News Sunday (I love watching him on Sundays when I don't have to teach Sun. Sch.). He's also a correspondent for NPR.

Mary Pattillo is a prof of sociology and African-American Studies at Northwestern.

The first book, inspired by Bill Cosby's controversial comments on race and class not too long ago, is a hue and cry about self-sabotaging behavior in the Black community. In the tradition of Marcus Garvey, BTW (a bit), WEB, and others, Williams makes the case for Black self-help and self-critique. And though he aptly challenges the common man, he really takes to task our leaders.

The second book traces the recent history of the North Kenwood-Oakland part of Chicago, examining everything from their educational institutions to their housing development, to see how Blacks from various economic groups have fared in this South Side community. Very interesting...

After Imus

2007-04-15T03:21:00.000-05:00

Okay, so now that the racist, sexist remarks of the above media man have been soundly condemned, it's time to move on to larger implications within the Black community.

Though the use of the N word and of sexist comments in hip hop certainly fail to justify Imus' statements, they do point to a broader issue that plagues our community. A friend sent me a YouTube video that I cannot even post a link to, which was filled with some of the worst caricatures of Black women and men that I have seen in some time. The video was made by a young southern African-American rapper who is extremely popular today. What is disturbing is that this 'artist' is not alone -- similar lyrics are pumped over the airwaves almost 24-7 (through radio and TV/videos), and their demand is so strong that they have made millionaires of many young Black rappers.

I'm a child of the Black ghetto, not at all shocked by some of the harsh realities that hip hop lyricists rap about. So I am saddened to see how hip hop has transformed from party music and protest music to music that glorifies the materialism and sexism of this age. Its vast popularity speaks to the fact that we have a problem as a community (and a nation), because we have no problem objectifying women on the regular (both in words and images) and we have no problem perpetuating stereotypes of our own people.

Though we didn't create Imus, we have certainly given him ammunition. It is wrong and hypocritical of us to castigate Imus and not take to task at all our own people whose words are also damaging and problematic. Do I equate Imus' statements with those of rap artists? Do I think the latters' words excuse the former's? Nope. But I do think we cannot ignore what is thrust into our face everyday: words and pictures of our women that reduce us to sex objects, and words and pictures of our men that reduce them to caricatures (pimps, criminals, etc.).

Though I was deeply hurt by Imus's remarks, I am grateful for this one thing: the incident helped shine light on a larger problem that needs to be addressed.

Today's BUILD - Part One

2007-04-14T19:52:00.000-05:00

Okay, so today's BUILD was a mix of inspiration and frustration. Mary Nelson's hour-long overview of Bethel New Life's three-decade work in Garfield Park was awesome. I was floored by the audacity (to use her term) of community elders years ago who decided to get into housing. I was amazed by the courage and perseverance of community leaders and lay people in the face of setbacks, no's, and other struggles. And I came away jazzed by our awesome God who has done such a great work through ordinary people. The asset-based approach to community development was very instructive for me, especially as I start a new high school that I hope will be community-oriented. I was challenged to view the students and families as having individual strengths and the community as possessing a wealth of resources in their associations, institutions, cultural history, stories, and land. And then connecting those resources was a further insight. As I think about and begin to form partnerships with those outside of the community for the benefit of my students, I must do what I have said I will do and look within the community as well -- I cannot ignore what people bring to the table themselves. My prayer is: Lord, give me the eyes to see what You have placed within the West side communities, and give me the humility and courage and wisdom to tap into those resources.

Okay, so that was the inspiration part....

After Ms. Nelson left, BUILD folks sat around and talked about questions her talk had sparked within us. One question that came up was whether or not it is essential to live within the community in which you serve -- whether or not you can truly have an impact on the poor if you don't live among them. I think we all agreed that the greatest impact you can have is when you are a part of the community you seek to serve. One young man shared how (though not from personal experience) your sense of urgency about poverty issues is heightened when you live in the neighborhood and hear gunshots at night yourself, versus being told about the experience from someone else. Yet, we all know folks who support city ministry both with finances and through volunteering, but who live in the suburbs or in better parts of the city. One woman talked about friends who have grown up 'in the hood' and don't want their children to experience the trials and tribulations of city life that they did, so they move out of the hood. Another young man commented how they take resources from the city (fellow Blacks in this case) so you have Black flight. I added, though, that I know folks who have a burden for urban ministry because that was their reality growing up, but they no longer live in the community. However, they are very active and have the same (or close to it) sense of urgency that community members have.

My personal thought on this matter is that you are most effective when you are a member of the community in which you serve (you relocate and live there), but you can have a degree of effectiveness if you have a sensitivity to city issues. I personally do not think everyone is called to live in the 'hood. I think God has His people everywhere, serving in all walks of life. I don't think it's any more spiritual to minister to the homeless than it is to minister to rich college kids. However, I do think God is calling every child of His to have a heart for the city, a sensitivity to its residents' needs, and a mentality that considers and cares for the poor and needy. What this translates into varies from person to person. For some, it is using their power and clout to affect legislation that supports the forgotten -- everything from fighting for a living wage to working for a change in the way public education is funded. For others, it is spending time on a regular basis volunteering in some way. For others, like my friend who grew up in the hood and no longer lives there, it is mentoring young people in foster family situations while caring for her daughters as a single mom. This woman is not concerned only with going to her daughter's volleyball games and dance recitals; she goes to the sports events of the youth she mentors, pays for them to have dance lessons along with her daughters, and makes sure they get into college as well as her daughter. Yet she doesn't live in the hood. But no one would say she has taken her resources away from the hood and abandoned those who could benefit from her example and her means.

Just my thoughts...

Bet You Didn't Know...

2007-04-12T21:11:00.000-05:00

... about these famous people who suffer(ed )from bipolar disorder (a.k.a. manic-depression)

Alvin Ailey
Buzz Aldrin, astronaut
Hans Christian Anderson, writer
Honors de Balzac
Ned Beatty, writer
Beethoven
Maurice Benard (Sonny, General Hospital)
William Blake, poet
Art Buchwald, writer, humorist
Tim Burton, artist, movie director
Lord Byron
Drew Carey
Jim Carrey
Dick Cavett, writer, media personality
Agatha Christie
Winston Churchill, prime minister
Rosemary Clooney, singer
Francis Ford Coppola, director
Charles Dickens
Emily Dickinson
Patty Duke
T.S. Eliot
Ralph Waldo Emerson
William Faulkner
Carrie Fisher, writer, actress
Robert Frost
F. Scott Fitzgerald
Connie Francis
Sigmund Freud
Cary Grant
Graham Greene, writer
Alexander Hamilton, politician
Mariette Hartley
Victor Hugo
Phyllis Hyman
Jack London
Robert Lowell, poet
Marilyn Monroe
Mozart
Kristy McNichol
Isaac Newton
Florence Nightingale
Jane Pauley
J.C. Penney
Plato
Poe
Charley Pride
Theodore Roosevelt
St Francis
Sidney Sheldon
Rod Steiger, film maker
Robert Louis Stevenson
Ben Stiller
Liz Taylor, actor
Mark Twain, author
Alfred, Lord Tennyson, poet
Ted Turner, entrepreneur, media giant
Jean-Claude Van Damme, athlete, actor
Vincent van Gogh
Kurt Vonnegut
Walt Whitman, poet
Robin Williams
Tennessee Williams, author
Jonathan Winters, comedian, actor, writer, artist
Robert E Lee, soldier
Abraham Lincoln (1809-1865), US President
Samuel Johnson, poet
Burgess Meredith, 1908-1997, actor, director

To name a few…

Adult Advocacy

2007-04-12T07:12:00.000-05:00

Okay, so I've always known this truth, but I'm realizing it more deeply lately, and it is this:
children's and youths' education is heavily a factor of what I call adult advocacy.

As I visit elementary schools to speak with 8th graders directly about our new high school, almost without exception, the youth are eager about the opportunity. I am well-received, and that reception is shown by the kinds of questions asked and, even when some students don't ask questions, by their attentiveness. What's been really eye-opening for me has been the contrast in the commitment of guidance counselors and teachers across schools.

Some schools I visit, like Tilton and Hammond, have awesome counselors who you can tell care about and are committed to their kids. These adult advocates, as I call them, go to great lengths to make sure their students complete and turn in applications for our school. In the case of the Hammond counselor, she and the two outstanding 8th grade teachers brought carloads of students to two open house sessions when most of their parents could not make it, to ensure their chances for a seat in our school. The counselor at Tilton, a school I visited later in my recruitment efforts, had already worked to have most of her 8th graders already placed in good schools even before I came. There were only about 8 students still in need of placement when I came in early April, a sign, as I told the counselor, that she is doing her job and doing right by her kids.

What's been saddening, though, are schools where the adult advocates aren't advocating. At one school I went to this week, I told the counselor about our website and how an application could be downloaded from it and copied for students (since I only had limited copies on me). This woman proceeded to complain how she's a counselor yet doesn't have a printer. When I asked if there were any other printers in the building, she said yes hesitatingly, but said they belong to other people and she doesn't want to use them. Then she added that she isn't willing to use her printer at home for school purposes. Whatever 'beef' this counselor has with other adults in the building, what was communicated to me was that she does not care enough about students to even make sure they get an application for a good school. It's no wonder that out of several classes of 8th graders, only 6 had been placed so far in this school (in contrast to the 8 who had not been placed in the other school). Thankfully, one of the 8th grade teachers had a printer in his classroom, but the counselor's only question for me (which she asked publicly when I opened the floor for students to ask questions) was whether or not we were a charter. What does that have to do with the price of tea in China? I was proud to say we were not, but what if we were? What difference would that make for kids? In all the questions I've been asked by kids, never has any student asked whether or not our school is a charter. That's because that issue is an adult one -- not a kid one. And again, the counselor showed her true colors: she was more concerned with herself than with her students.

What have I learned from these visits? Well, first and foremost, I am thankful for those God placed around me when I was young who advocated for me in some way or another -- for those who took up the slack from what was missing in my home so that I could have a future. My sister is top of the list. My aunt, grandparents, and Sunday School teacher are not too far behind. Some of my teachers at school make the list, too.

What needs to happen in the lives of youth today is they need other adults to take up the slack, so to speak, when those who should be their advocates are not. I think about an after-school coordinator who learned about our school and encouraged youth in her program to apply. And she went the extra mile when the parent/guardian didn't show for the mandatory enrollment session to secure her seat. This after-school worker 'standing in the gap' so to speak and taking up the cause of this young girl can make the difference between a quality high school experience or a hellish one. The difference between a bright future and a gloomy one.

Adult advocates, where are you?

Of Imus and School Violence

2007-04-11T21:06:00.000-05:00

Okay, so you can already tell that this entry will be a little scattered in topic.

Well, I must say the decision to pull the plug on Imus' radio show was music to my ears. Not that I make it a habit of relishing in another person's trials, but I was ecstatic to see the issues of racism and sexism taken seriously for a change. However, I cannot fully rejoice because I feel MSNBC (my opinion) only axed Imus in order to woo sponsors back. How convenient that Imus' firing came after Proctor and Gamble, Staple's, GM, and others pulled their ads from NBC over Imus' remarks. Don't know whether to rejoice or fume...

Oh, and I was deeply saddened to hear that, after my blog on school violence a few days ago, the next day there was another school shooting (two students shot in one incident) at the same school I talked about in my blog before. Though I was pleased to learn this shooting was accidental (a student brought a gun to school and accidentally it went off and shot another student in the thigh and the bullet richocheted and caught the shooter, I think), I was still gloomy over the fact that the student could get the gun into the building in the first place. I am not surprised, though, because on two different occasions I visited the school to see a teacher, and both times I entered an open door that had no security guard (not the front door), and never in the building did anyone ask me (or a colleague who also visited) what we were there for (even though we stayed for over an hour each time). Not safe at all....

Why Al Sharpton Is Popular (And Why It's Hard To Hold Onto Hope)

2007-04-10T10:17:00.000-05:00

At a BUILD alumni meeting a few months ago, we were discussing why the voices of the Revs. Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton are so popular among African-Americans when these men themselves have tainted pasts and often come across as self-promoting demagogues. When I discussed the angst I feel about having these men serve as the voice of the people, given their motives and pasts are not exactly pure, one African-American man asked, "Joyce, isn't any voice better than no voice at all?" At the time, I wasn't sure.

After the Don Imus-Rutgers U. Female Basketball Team incident, I found myself cheering Al Sharpton on as he demanded disciplinary action of the racist radio host. At the time, I did not care about Sharpton's questionable history at all; I was simply grateful that someone was horrified by the same injustice I was, and cared enough to speak up and to speak out.

My gratitude soon turned into sadness, though, when I waited day after day for members of the evangelical community to say something about this incident. Not only were the folks silent who I expected to be silent (the James Dobsons, Jerry Falwells, and Pat Robertsons of the world, and those like them), but folks I expected to speak up were quiet as well. No blog entries expressing horror and disgust over Imus' clearly stereotypical views. Nope. I wonder why. Maybe a desire not to be 'negative'. Now I can see why Black Muslims were so popular in the sixties.

I also thought about my best friend Barbara, who attended Rutgers U. as an undergrad many years ago. She told me about a time when her white roommate, unbeknownst to her, copied her paper, and how their professor automatically assumed she was the person who cheated. The professor called Barbara in and chided her for copying from the white roommate. The look in Barbara's eyes as she explained how it didn't even enter her professor's mind that she had actually been the bright and hard-working one, was pretty painful to see. The expectation of being incompetent, of being 'less than', is truly devastating.

So whether degrading views are voiced based on intelligence, or based on appearance (as in the case of the basketball players), great damage has been done.

Reminds me of this Countee Cullen poem entitled, ironically, "Incident": (and not knowing who Countee Cullen is is another sad commentary on Blacks being ignored in America)

"Incident"

Once riding in old Baltimore,
Heart-filled, head-filled with glee,
I saw a Baltimorean
Keep looking straight at me.
Now I was eight and very small,
And he was no whit bigger,
And so I smiled, but he poked out
His tongue, and called me, "Nigger."
I saw the whole of Baltimore
From May until December;
Of all the things that happened there
That's all that I remember.

Langston Hughes - "I Dream A World"

2007-04-09T23:25:00.001-05:00

Here's the great poem by the Shakespeare of the Harlem Renaissance:

"I Dream A World"

I dream a world where man
No other man will scorn,
Where love will bless the earth
And peace its paths adorn.
I dream a world where all
Will know sweet freedom's way,
Where greed no longer saps the soul
Nor avarice blights our day.
A world I dream where black or white,
Whatever race you be,
Will share the bounties of the earth
And every man is free,
Where wretchedness will hang its head
And joy, like a pearl,
Attends the needs of all mankind--
Of such I dream, my world!

I Dream A School

2007-04-09T23:09:00.000-05:00

For a little over a week now, I have not been able to get out of my mind a conversation I had with a young girl at our youth retreat. She doesn't go to our church, so this was my first time meeting her. A sophomore, she commented how she does not like to go to school. When I inquired why, she proceeded to point to the huge scar on the side of her face.

This teenager then told me about how she was cut in the face by a girl who goes to her school, and how the scar looks much better because it was much bigger. When I asked what happened to the girl, I was told she was allowed back into the school, and cut another girl in her throat. The fear that this sophomore has of being a victim of violence is a harsh reality, and it's keeping her from having a normal high school experience.

Just so happens that at this retreat, I had in my pocket a newspaper clipping of her high school (not knowing it was hers when I put the article in my pocket). Her school was in the paper for two incidents where students were shot in the school parking lot -- two times this school year. I clipped the article because I visited the school twice to see a teacher there, and I thought of how I could've easily been a victim of violence intended for someone else.

The sad reality is that this situation is not unique. Incidents of violence like this occur all the time in inner city high schools. When discussing this situation with a youth worker later at the retreat, he recounted how his brother was 'shot up' very badly at his high school, and returned.

What is going on in our schools? I dream a school where students will be able to learn in a safe environment. I dream a school where youngsters will be able to focus on their studies, on fostering healthy relationships with one another, and on dreaming about and planning for their bright futures.

I dream a school...

Why I Love Hip Hop

2007-04-06T07:27:00.000-05:00

Okay, so I could write all day on this matter, but I'm going to just focus on one reason right now:

Hip hop is the voice of the masses; it is the language of the streets. Like it or lump it, hip hop is a major vehicle through which common folks get to have their say -- to let their voice be heard. Granted, sometimes the voice is angry, sometimes it's materialistic and misogynistic (hope I spelled that right), and sometimes it is downright selfish and unbiblical. At other times that voice is insightful, poignant, compassionate, and powerful. Either way, it's still the voice of the people.

Like other music and art forms, hip hop expresses the sentiments of the day; it exposes the philosophies and belief systems of many people of its time. This is what is meant when you hear rappers defend themselves against criticism, simply stating that they are "keeping it real", writing about reality and what they see, being honest, and reflecting society. Though I disagree that mirroring the age is the primary duty of artists, on one level I see their point. Wanna know what common folks of our day value and believe? Listen to their poets, hip hop artists.

This does not mean I blindly accept or support hip hop (culture) in its totality. No, like other cultures, I am affirming of its positives and critical of its negatives and yes, today's hip hop is not all good. I can understand the concerns of those who bemoan lyrics that: 1) objectify women, 2) glorify criminal activities and immoral practices that land many of my people behind bars or unproductive, and 3) fail to use its mass appeal and influence to uplift the masses. However,I cannot listen to hip hop for long without its words resonating within my heart. When rappers point out injustices and hypocrisies and pains of human existence, people can 'feel' them; that is one of the main reasons rap is so popular.

Well, this post is too long already. I'm going to end with some Tupac and Biggie ("Running/Dyin' To Live") - words that encapsulate the frustration of many (not just poor Blacks):

"Why am I fighting to live, If I'm just living to fight?

Why am I trying to see, When there ain't nothing in sight?

Why am I trying to give, When no one gives me a try?

Why am I dying to live, If I'm just living to die?"

Good Read

2007-04-05T20:48:00.000-05:00

Right now I am reading an excellent book by D.A Carson called Becoming Conversant with the Emerging Church: Understanding a Movement and Its Implications. I highly recommend this book for all Christians to read. Essentially it examines the emerging/emergent church movement and what is right and what is wrong about it. The author gives a pretty even-handed analysis, being more gracious than I likely would have been in terms of presenting the movement's strengths, and being humbly honest in assessing its weaknesses. This book is a must-read for any Christian who wants to respond biblically to our post-modern culture.

Competing Interests

2007-04-05T15:17:00.000-05:00

Okay, so I'm going to weigh in on the whole upcoming presidential election thing.

This morning as I listened to the news, I thought how untrue the statement is that anybody can become president. As I heard newscasters rattle off just how much money various presidential hopefuls have raised for their campaigns ($24 mil I think was the tops), I thought about how unlikely it is that someone born poor has making it to the Executive Seat. I don't want to sound negative and I don't want to discourage progress, but it takes a great deal of money and connections to reach that position. The candidate I would vote for in a heartbeat, Dennis Kucinich, probably won't even be in the running because I doubt he could raise a fraction of what Edwards, McCain, and others have managed to amass for their runs.

And this whole Obama thing has me tripping. On one hand, I am so proud of this candidate of color, and I am infuriated by racist comments like Sen. Biden's. On the other hand, I am frustrated with Al Sharpton and others who allude to the fact that Obama is not 'Black enough', that his journey has not been that of other Black presidential hopefuls, and that he does not defer enough to Black America. Yes, I respect the fact that Sharpton and others don't want Obama to assume he has the Black vote, and that they want Obama to really represent the interests of African-Americans. However, there's something in Sharpton's tone and comments that smack of the whole 'crabs in a barrel' metaphor...

And one more thing: Should I vote for Obama or Hillary? Both, along with Edwards, represent my interests more than any Republican candidate (and I just can't stand Guiliani). But, even in preliminary discussions over who I should vote for, it seems my people of color expect me to show racial allegiance and to ignore the fact that though I am Black, I am a woman, also. Hillary has more political experience than Obama, but I know there are a lot of very experienced congressmen/women for whom I wouldn't cast my ballot. I dunno. I think this political campaign will be a very interesting one....

Suffering

2007-04-05T06:32:00.000-05:00

Today I read in Paul's letter to the Church at Colosse:

"Now I rejoice in my sufferings for your sake, and in my flesh I do my share on behalf of His body, which is the church, in filling up what is lacking in Christ's afflictions.

Of this church I was made a minister according to the stewardship from God bestowed on me for your benefit, so that I might fully carry out the preaching of the word of God,..." (1:24-25)

What initially stood out to me from these verses is the oddness of Paul rejoicing in his sufferings. I was struck by how unusual and illogical it is to respond to suffering with joy. Then I thought back to Paul in other places (how in Acts 5:41, he and others rejoiced that they were counted worthy to suffer for Christ's name; and how another prison letter, this time to the Philippians, abounded with references to being joyful, though his natural condition of imprisonment left a lot to be desired). So as odd as this response is to me, at least Paul is consistent!

Then I thought about the words of Jesus Christ Himself: that our attitude towards suffering for Him (persecuted was the term He used) should be rejoicing (Matthew 5:10-12).

My next thought was, "Why? Why in the world would anyone respond to any kind of suffering with joy?" Well, in the case of suffering for Christ and His Church, there are numerous reasons: 1) It is an honor to be connected with Christ, even by suffering for Him and as He did; 2) Jesus said our heavenly reward is great when we are persecuted for Him; and 3) Suffering to share Christ and His Gospel with others is worth it when we see folks' present lives and eternal destinies forever changed by the transforming power of salvation.

Well, my thoughts now turned inward. I asked myself, "Joyce, what is your attitude toward suffering for Christ?" Wish I could say something different, but it wasn't pretty. My tendency is to shrink back from it, avoid it at all costs, even rail against those at whose hands I suffer. Part of this is natural and understandable. I mean, who in her right mind signs up for the school of suffering? No one. But there is another part of me that seeks to avoid association with Christ and His work simply because of the suffering it brings. And that is not good. It is tantamount to being ashamed of Christ.

Next my mind moved to a rather basic but oft-overlooked point: We will suffer for Christ. The how differs depending on our situation or locale, but the fact remains the same. I believe it was Timothy who made the observation that ALL who live godly in Christ Jesus will suffer persecution. This remark does not mean we should be anti-culture or that we should disengage from the world around us. It simply means salt doesn't just preserve; it stings. Light doesn't just illuminate; it hurts the eyes and it exposes the dirt. Jesus said some people didn't receive Him because He was the Light and they loved darkness more because their deeds were evil and they didn't want anyone shedding light on them. What's really bugged is Jesus' comments to His disciples about their new relationship with the world. In a word, he characterized it as HATE. Dang! Check out John 15:18-25. Contrary to the beliefs of my post-modern-loving friends, Jesus' language in this passage is pretty exclusive rather than inclusive. There is clearly an in and an out group. There is a sharp dichotomy of those who belong to Him and those who do not. And there's not a hint of arrogance in Jesus' relation of these realities; He's just kicking the facts. And it's like He's preparing His followers for what they will experience (antagonism and hostility at times from those in the world) so that they will not be devastated when they go through it. And get this: Jesus used Himself as the prime example of being hated by the world and suffering at its hands.

My take-aways:
Joyce, never fear being who you are, whether it is at work or with dissenting Christians. Never fear the feelings of being different, of being an outcast or oddball, that come from being associated with Christ. Don't try to blend in so much that you lose your Christian uniqueness, your distinctiveness (salt is then good for nothing). Don't hide your light under a bushel. If you do, how will folks be drawn to the Light?

And from the example of Jesus, Paul, and other martyrs, it's clear that my response to persecution and suffering for Christ should never be physical retaliation or even feelings of superiority or arrogance (all were mad humble) or even being ashamed of the Gospel so much so that I cease to share it or cease to live it. No, the response is to commit myself to the One who is able to keep me and to even use me amidst my suffering.

A Glimpse of Heaven

2007-03-25T22:21:00.001-05:00

Today I visited another church to share about my new school. When the choir belted out "He reigns forever!" and "All hail King Jesus!" at the top of their lungs, and I saw a choir full of folks (male and female, young and old, light-skinned and dark, casually dressed and dressed up) worshipping the LORD without abandon, I tell you, my heart was full. I declare, I began to smile with joy at the thought that in heaven we will be worshipping our God corporately, in unison and on one accord, possibly like this. So it was with glee that I stood up and added my voice to the resounding chorus.

But almost as quickly as the heaven thought flashed through my mind, another one popped up. I recalled the passage in Revelation that talks about a multitude praising God in heaven, and I couldn't help but remember that the chorus there will be comprised of people from every nation. So I felt a twinge of sadness mixed in with joyful praise. Kind of like the mixed feelings we get when we experience the 'already/not yet' aspects of the Kingdom (salvation from sin's penalty -- already; salvation from sin's presence -- not yet; touches of God's physical healing -- already; complete healing to come in heaven -- not yet).

I also began to think if I'll ever be a part of a non-diverse church again. Not likely. Though I didn't select my current home church because it was racially/ethnically diverse, I must say that I have grown to enjoy it and, thanks to Pastor's teachings, to see that it represents God's heart. And, the thought of that Revelation passage is so appealing that I want to ever move towards it -- not away from it. In fact, it's got me thinking about my friendships and my work relationships, and how I can be more intentional in creating cross-cultural friendships.

Just got me wondering....

"After these things I looked, and behold, a great multitude which no one could count, from every nation and all tribes and peoples and tongues, standing before the throne and before the Lamb, clothed in white robes, and palm branches were in their hands; and they cry out with a loud voice, saying, "Salvation to our God who sits on the throne, and to the Lamb." And all the angels were standing around the throne and around the elders and the four living creatures; and they fell on their faces before the throne and worshiped God, saying, "Amen, blessing and glory and wisdom and thanksgiving and honor and power and might, be to our God forever and ever. Amen." (Revelation 7:9-12)

IN MEMORIAM: Maryann Whitt

2007-03-17T17:53:00.000-05:00

"As day comes, and night falls/

For the rest of our lives we'll miss y'all/

And even though life must go on /

We still mourn /

While wishin' y'all were home"

-- Nas feat. Quan ("Just A Moment")

I met Ms. Whitt about 24 years ago when I was about 14 years old, and for two years in high school, she took my best friend Gwen and me under her wing. Together the three of us worshipped at New Hope and visited many other churches, and Ms. Whitt let us tag along with her wherever she went. She talked about the Word with us, prayed with us, let us hang out at her apartment -- she shared her life with us, in all of its trials and triumphs. Ms. Whitt was real, transparent, down-to-earth, funny, spiritual, and she loved life. And she encouraged all of these things in Gwen and me. She took two 'know-it-all' teenage girls who were short on humility and she put up with us. She let us bug her on the phone, listened to our problems, hopes, fears. That meant a lot to us. To me. Especially since the adults in my home were dealing with their own demons of addiction. And Ms. Whitt never said anything bad about my parents. She was just there for me. She was like a mother to me. A spiritual mother.

Ms. Whitt encouraged us to be all we could be for God. So when we went off to college -- one to Harvard, the other to Yale -- she cheered us on. And when, after two years of college, I came home pregnant, Ms. Whitt still accepted me. I'm sure she was disappointed, but she didn't scold me. That was not her way. She was forgiving. She even shared her own struggles in this area with me, and encouraged me to keep going. She visited me in the hospital right after the birth of my daughter, calling her an angel and her deformed arms 'wings'. And when I went back to Yale with my daughter and graduated two years later, Ms. Whitt set up a City Hall honoring of me, which led to a newspaper article and my first teaching job and a monetary show of support for my daughter from the Whighams.

None of this was asked for. It was just Ms. Whitt's way. She was giving. And even when my relationship with my best friend Gwen became strained and ended, Ms. Whit always asked me, whenever I talked to her, "When was the last time you heard from Gwen?"

I'm under no illusions about Ms. Whitt's shortcomings. She was human. She liked men, and she liked to smoke. One of the funniest memories I have of her is the three of us being on the phone, and Ms. Whitt talking to us about God through puffs of a cigarette. Which was always followed by Gwen and I reprimanding her about her smoking, and her telling us she was asking the Lord to remove the taste of cigarettes from her mouth. Flawed as she was, I am confident Ms. Whitt knew and loved God. She never justified anything that was not right in her lifestyle. In fact, for a period, she pushed Gwen and me away because she did not want to be a bad influence on us. It's undeniable Ms. Whitt loved God and she loved people. No matter how many mistakes she made in life, she clung to God, held on to her Savior.

I'm going to miss you, Ms. Whitt. Maverick. Evangelist. Prophetess. You wrote in my high school yearbook that we'd build many churches in Jesus' name. Well, I haven't planted any churches, but I am starting a high school from scratch. If I can touch the lives of teenagers the way you touched my life, if I can build their confidence and put wind under their wings so they can soar past their troubled environments to unseen heights, then I'll be satisfied. See you in heaven, Ms. Whitt.

Someone Else's Eyes

2007-02-01T21:13:00.000-06:00

Starting a school from scratch is becoming just almost as much about my own growth and development as it is about that of the students I hope to serve.

In recruiting students and families for this start-up high school that I'm opening in the fall, I was asked on a number of occasions about how diverse the school would be (thanks Tiffany, Michael, and board member). Each time I brushed off the question, thinking that my Black face as a school leader would likely turn off many Hispanic families, along with the history and reputation of the school we're replacing (99.5% Black). Additionally, since four new small schools opened up in the mainly Hispanic section of our community, I figured that would be the natural place where families with Hispanic students would go. Finally, I felt there were already quality schools in the city targeting that population, but comparatively few quality ones for African-American high schoolers.

Wanting to make sure I stuck with my passion of offering quality education for all urban youth, I did not limit my visits to elementary schools. What I found at one school amazed me! Though I don't speak a word of Spanish, the students there took to me (especially the fellas) and I took to them. They listened to what I had to say about the new school, they asked great questions, and their concerns were the same as those at the mainly Black schools I visited (Will there be sports? How will three schools share one building? What will the teachers be like? And so on.) So began my lesson on what it's like to be a different minority in the U.S.

I realized that for many Hispanic families (and I know that's the wrong term), an obstacle to access is basic communication. So I worked hard to get materials in Spanish and to get a translator. The best I could do was get some of the materials translated, and a student served as translator. Wanting to make all families feel welcomed (another priority of mine), I realized I need to serve various kinds of food -- not just the regular chicken and fish. That took more money and more effort. And I had to make sure I did not ignore parents just because they don't speak English (I don't like it when people ignore my daughter, who's non-verbal).

Wow, what a lesson! I went home wondering what it is like to navigate a public school system without the basic tool of language easily at your disposal. I wondered what it is like to entrust your child to a school whose culture is so different from yours. I wondered what our school will need to make sure we build bridges with all our parents. Exciting, but tough. And humbling. I attend a multi-cultural church where decisions about staffing, worship style, and so on are made all the time. I'm just now starting to get a glimpse as to how sensitive one has to be when the environment is diverse.

But man, it would be so great to have a diverse body of students! Everyone will be enriched by the culture, background, talents, and personalities of the other. Our students will be exposed to a glimpse of the big wide world out there as they learn to interact peacefully with those both similar to and different from themselves.

Lord, forgive my protective provincialism! And continue to teach me to look at life through someone else's eyes.

HANNAH

2007-01-15T20:07:00.000-06:00

“She [Hannah], greatly distressed, prayed to the LORD and wept bitterly.”
– I Samuel 1:10

This O.T. record of a godly woman’s struggles speaks to us today in at least two ways.

Hannah’s trials show us that believers are not exempt from the everyday troubles of life. Hannah’s heart was broken because of situations God allowed and because of circumstances sinful man caused. Hannah was barren (and we are told twice in back-to-back verses – five and six – that Yahweh had closed her womb). So this God-fearing woman lacked the ability to conceive – the very thing that virtually defined what it meant to be a woman in her time. Our Sovereign Lord could have altered the situation, but He chose not to at the time, so this woman endured pain as a result of a condition that God permitted. In addition, Hannah had human-caused trouble. She was “bitterly provoked” and “irritated” by her “rival” – her husband’s second wife. For whatever reason, Hannah’s husband succumbed to the culture of the day and took two wives, contrary to God’s vision for marriage and His explicit commands. The result? The wife with children (Peninnah) constantly mocked the wife without children (Hannah). Both barrenness and ridicule left Hannah “oppressed in spirit”, “afflicted”, and weeping so much she could barely eat. To make matters worse, when Hannah went to “church” (the Temple), she was falsely accused of being drunk and sharply rebuked by the priest! Yes, God’s people do go through severe trials at times. So, what are we to do?

Well, Hannah’s response to her struggles shows us that our troubles should motivate us to draw near to God. What I love about this whole situation is Hannah’s unashamed, honest prayers to God. She put aside her self-reliance and pride and inhibitions and “poured out her soul before the LORD” (verse 15). What an encouragement for us to do the same! Oh, how tempting it is either to try to figure out on our own the answers to the problems that plague us, or to wallow in self-pity – both of which keep us from the very God who cares for us and who can provide the guidance and comfort we need for the situations we encounter.

So today, I encourage you not to neglect communing with your wonderful Father. If you’re having a ‘valley’ experience right now, do like your sister Hannah and take your burdens to the Lord. If you’re having a ‘mountaintop’ experience today, then let your thanks and praises to God ring from that height! But be sure to remember a brother or sister (or even an unsaved friend or family member) who is ‘going through’, and intercede for them right now. Stand in the gap in prayer and petition God on their behalf.

“For whatever was written in earlier times
was written for our instruction, so that through
perseverance and the encouragement of the Scriptures
we might have hope.”
-- Romans 15:4

JUST A WORD

2007-01-15T20:02:00.000-06:00

JUST A WORD

Recently I have been reminded of the numerous times in Scripture when Jesus was teaching His disciples, using words or actions, and they just ‘did not get it’. Recalling the many occasions where the Twelve did not grasp the full meaning, missed the point altogether, or were just ‘clueless’ about a matter of great importance to the Savior, I found myself first snickering at their bumbling, then convicted by my own ignorance and arrogant impatience with others.

Here’s a sampling of what I’m talking about (all texts NIV— emphasis mine):

1) After Jesus dropped the ‘bomb’ on His followers that He was going to be betrayed, this is what Scriptures say was their response: “But they did not understand what this meant. It was hidden from them, so that they did not grasp it, and they were afraid to ask Him about it.” – Luke 9:45

2) Maybe it was the topic, but again Jesus took the Twelve aside to tell them of His impending fate, this time being more explicit, perhaps because His crucifixion date was getting closer. Jesus told His boys He was going to be mocked, insulted, spit on, flogged, and killed, but then resurrected on the third day, just as the prophets wrote about. What was their reaction? “The disciples did not understand any of this. Its meaning was hidden from them, and they did not know what He was talking about.” – Luke 18:34

3) Now I can see how the Twelve would be confused by this next chain of events. Jesus entered Jerusalem on a donkey and quoted some Old Testament passages that predicted his entry (something about a King coming). True to form, here’s what’s said about His crew: “These things His disciples did not understand at the first; but when Jesus was glorified, then they remembered that these things were written of Him, and that they had done these things to Him.” – John 12:16

4) Here’s one of the most stunningly stark realities of the Twelve thus far: Jesus had been crucified, and we all know it was women who first learned of and then shared with others that Jesus was no longer dead but had risen (yeah!). Well, Peter and John, Jesus’ closest disciples, ran to the tomb to see for themselves if what the women said was true (did not sound like they believed Jesus would rise, right?). Here’s what’s said of John, the disciple Jesus loved: “So the other disciple who had first come to the tomb [John] then also entered, and he saw and believed. For as yet they did not understand the Scripture, that He must rise again from the dead.” – John 20:9

Whoa!

I’ve cited just a few instances that prove there was a great deal about Jesus – His mission and purposes – that His followers did not understand while He walked this earth. There are many, many other cases where the disciples’ words or actions showed a serious lack of understanding.*

What can we take away from all this? Was Jesus just such a ‘deep’ Teacher that He had a hard time translating His knowledge to His pupils? I don’t think so. The struggle that Jesus’ followers had with getting the meaning behind some of His words and actions has several applications for us today. Wanna hear them, hear they go…
1) With respect to others’ salvation and spiritual growth, have patience. A teacher by calling and profession, I know first-hand the frustration that comes when you try to teach a student something and, even after many tries, they ‘still don’t get it’. Imagine how Jesus, the greatest Teacher of all time, felt when He tried to communicate serious biblical truths to His disciples, only to find ‘they did not understand ANY of it’ – they didn’t even know what He was talking about! (Luke 18:34 above) And there did seem to be times when Jesus got a little frustrated, like when He chided the Twelve for not grasping the meaning behind His a miracle, proven by the fact that they still had unbelief when they were faced with the need for a similar miracle. But by and large, Jesus was extremely patient with the boys. How do I know? He did not give up trying to teach them. He repeated His messages over and over again, sometimes through hands-on lessons, other times through Old Testament references, still other times through real-life illustrations. As we seek to communicate the truths of the Gospel and of God’s Word to others, we’d do well to follow our Lord’s example. Whether it is a child or teenager we’re raising, a friend we’re discipling, or a co-worker we’re witnessing to, let’s not become discouraged when we share the truths of God’s word, only to have them bounce off the person’s heart and head like a basketball on a concrete court. Remember what Paul said: some of us plant, and others water (I Cor. 3:5-7). This nature comparison emphasizes many facts, one of which is that a person’s grasp of the truth is often a process. So don’t let exasperation hinder the process. (Think: How many times did you hear the Gospel before you got saved? How many times have you studied a passage/heard sermons on a topic before you let God change you in that area? How many people do you know who initially rejected God’s Word but later yielded to it and are standing strong for God to this day?)

2) With respect to others’ salvation and spiritual growth, remember God’s sovereignty. I can’t help but notice that in many of the passages describing the disciples’ ignorance, that ignorance was only temporary. In fact, in some cases the Bible says full understanding was ‘hidden’ from them at the time, and it was later that they understood and believed. Going back to Paul’s plant analogy, he said ultimately it is “God who gives the increase”. No matter how eloquent we are, no matter how knowledgeable we are or how skillful we are in sharing knowledge, our ability alone is insufficient to give a person understanding. God in His sovereignty has to move on a person’s heart and illuminate his/her mind so they can grasp the truth. So remember the role of God’s sovereign revealing – in His sovereign time – as you seek to see people’s lives changed through their understanding and acceptance of God’s truth.

3) With respect to the questions and problems of life, don’t be so quick to have all the answers. If Jesus’ own followers, who walked with Him closely on this earth in the flesh, did not understand some things, then surely there will be some matters that we just do not have understanding of as well. I remember shortly after 9/11 occurred a preacher stated that he knew why 9/11 happened. He went on to give some bogus reason, but I was struck by how certain this dude was that he knew why such a tragic event occurred. Knowing this person, I think he felt a need to have an explanation, maybe for unbelievers, as to why his God would allow such a horrible situation. I would like an answer, too, but the truth of the matter is, I don’t know why God chose to allow such a level of tragedy, in that case or in the case of the tsunami or the Holocaust or American slavery. The difference is that I am not going to pretend I have answers when I don’t. I realize that there is a limit to my knowledge and understanding, and there is a degree of mystery to God and His purposes that I will have as long as I’m on this earth. And as knowledge-loving as I am, by faith I have to rest in God’s character (as revealed in His word) even when I can’t explain this world. I believe it was Bro. Paul who said right now we see through a glass darkly, but when we see Jesus we’ll see more clearly (I Cor. something).

4) Last but not least, with respect to your own growth (in matters both spiritual and temporal), have patience. Sometimes the same frustration we feel towards others who don’t grow at the pace we’d like, we also have with ourselves. At times that feeling’s valid, but at other times it’s more a manifestation of impatience and arrogance than trust in God. Sometimes this frustration comes from a desire to be perfect, to have success (even spiritually), and to have a measure of ease. But one thing I’m learning in life is that true growth takes time. In Jesus’ parable about the seed and the sower, the seed that sprouted overnight didn’t last because it lacked depth. The seed that was genuine and lasting went deep and took time to grow. The same is true in Jesus’ parable about building your house on rock (which is harder and takes longer) versus building your house on sand. It took time for the leader of the disciples to go from being the ‘reed’ to the ‘rock’. It took experiences over time for the disciples to go from trusting Jesus in general to understanding and believing in Him as Messiah and Savior. And it’s going to take time and experience, orchestrated of course by God’s grace, to go from one level to the next in our obedience to Christ in whatever area(s) we are struggling with. Wanting perfection overnight is not realistic – though some growth should be evident over time.

One final point: Even though a certain lack of understanding is ‘understandable’ J, there is a lack of understanding that should be avoided at all costs. There is a failure to ‘grasp’ spiritual truths that comes from a hardened heart and a blindness to God’s Word because we’re rejecting or resisting God’s will. That’s not the kind that I’m talking about. What’s the difference? Well, it’s the difference between the student who doesn’t understand the lesson because they cannot, even though they try hard, and the student who doesn’t understand because they don’t want to (they cut class, they don’t do homework, they goof off through class – pattern of resistance). May God reveal to you where that difference lies.

Well, I’ve used too much of your time.

Peace,

*John 10:6-- the disciples and the crowds didn’t understand the shepherd-sheep figure of speech Jesus was using to describe His salvific role
John 13:7 -- Peter didn’t understand why Jesus would stoop so low as to wash his feet; Jesus seems resigned to this reality, and just tells Peter he’ll understand later
Matthew 15:15-16; 16:9, 11-12; Mark 4:10-13; Mark 8:15-21 -- the disciples didn’t understand the parables Jesus spoke – so they often took Him aside and asked Him to explain what they meant; the disciples didn’t understand the miracles Jesus did or the figure of speech He used to describe the religious leaders – at first, all resulting in Jesus repeatedly asking questions like: “You still don’t understand?”

Quality Education -- A Moral Imperative

2006-12-17T20:37:00.000-06:00

"I shall create! If not a note, a hole.
If not an overture, a desecration."

These lines from the Gwendolyn Brooks poem "boy breaking glass" speak volumes to the need of all people, children and youth included, to realize their dreams and live up to their God-given potential. And these lines also speak to the tragedy that happens when the cries for self- actualization within us are muted by the circumstances of life. All too often, the violence, crime, and self-destruction that we see in our urban areas is a cry to be heard, to make one's mark, to exert one's influence over something, even if that influence is more harmful than constructive.

It's what gives the young men in our ghettos a sick sense of power by committing crimes

it's what makes my daughter love Bisou....

"To Be Of Use", by Marge Piercy

2006-12-17T20:30:00.000-06:00

This is one of my favorite poems. My department chair gave it to us English teachers as she resigned her position to start her own school. It's stayed in my heart ever since, and I shared it with family and friends when I left NJ for seminary in TX. (Don't quite know if they understood or appreciated it, though.)

Recently, I've seen this poem shared two or three times, so thought I'd post it, as it's always been a source of inspiration to me.

Wanna hear it, here it go....

To Be of Use by Marge Piercy

The people I love the best
jump into work head first
without dallying in the shallows
and swim off with sure strokes almost out of sight.
They seem to become natives of that element,
the black sleek heads of seals
bouncing like half-submerged balls.

I love people who harness themselves, an ox to a heavy cart,
who pull like water buffalo, with massive patience,
who strain in the mud and the muck to move things forward,
who do what has to be done, again and again.

I want to be with people who submerge
in the task, who go into the fields to harvest
and work in a row and pass the bags along,
who are not parlor generals and field deserters
but move in a common rhythm
when the food must come in or the fire be put out.

The work of the world is common as mud.
Botched, it smears the hands, crumbles to dust.
But the thing worth doing well done
has a shape that satisfies, clean and evident.
Greek amphoras for wine or oil,
Hopi vases that held corn, are put in museums
but you know they were made to be used.
The pitcher cries for water to carry
and a person for work that is real.

More on BUILD

2006-10-29T18:17:00.000-06:00

Okay, so we're in our, um, 6th week or so of BUILD. I regret I missed the past two weeks b.c. the group visited some cool places -- CURE and Bethel New Life, I think. This past week we went to the local precinct and learned about the average crimes that are committed and the rise in juvenile and female offenders. The officer who gave us a guided tour was very knowledgeable about the police and justice system, as well as about human and social problems. 'Speaking for himself' and not the dept., he had wonderful words of wisdom about the tendency of legal system to harshly penalize all drug-related crimes and the dearth of social services to help addicts get clean and ex-cons to get jobs and get back on the right track. Even exposing such institutional ills that make city life tough for all, this officer also gently berated residents for letting our families and educational system and spiritual base erode. These structures and forces used to be stronger and now they are sorely suffering. So there was some talk of personal responsibility, though it wasn't worded as such.

What left me thinking from the meeting were a couple of things:

1) The main thing was whether or not there is really hope to change the status quo. At times when you take a tough, 'realistic' look, you end up depressed and hopeless, which I don't think is what God wants and I don't think is very useful. How do you really change people's lives holistically (spiritually and naturally, both their hearts and their circumstances), let alone whole communities of folks or whole institutional structures that are so oppressive, racist, and even classist? I know the cliches that talk about making change one person at a time, but, as one sister in the group mentioned, when change is so slow, it's easy to get discouraged. I can honestly see why some folks turn a deaf ear and a blind eye to the plight of those in the inner city. On one level, it's like what I did with the Tsunami tragedy and others like it that are so catastrophic: closed my eyes, turned the TV off, and tried to put it out of mind b.c. it was so overwhelming. But Lord, that's not what our Savior did. The masses, who were like sheep w.o a shepherd, caused Jesus to be moved w. compassion. He didn't draw away from them, like so many people do when they look at TT, my daughter who has an unusual disability. No, Jesus was drawn TO them -- even to the dreaded outcast lepers. Lord, I pray that you make my heart tender again and that you soften me w.in so that my reaction is not to run and put my head in the sand but to FEEL, b.c. feeling leads to action....

2) How do you measure progress? How do you know that you are really making a difference? Yeah, yeah, we can say all the things we're supposed to say, like God just requires that we are faithful, and that our Western society has programmed us to think that if we're not seeing 'results', then the endeavor isn't worthwhile. I am certainly the first person to decry the mindset that measures success by numbers of people or other superficial things. However, I have also seen Christian groups that operate so loosely and seriously reflect (objectively, w. an outside view) so lamely that a healthy dose of "Are you carrying out your mission?" is needed. Steve, I think you're right. The answer is in re-defining success, but I think success has to be defined. Even if we concede that some of it will be undefinable. Okay, I'm starting to not make sense, so I must be tired...

The third and last thing I'm thinking about as a result of the last (and every) BUILD mtg is the whole personal responsibility vs. institiutional blame thing. No easy answer there. Just a caution to include both and not to swing to either extreme. I think conservatives foolishly over-emphasize personal responsibility, which keeps them from seeing (and therefore dismantling) institutional racism. On the other hand, I think liberals just as foolishly over-emphasize institutional factors, which keeps them from seeing (and therefore dismantling) factors within the culture and mindset of the poor and others that contribute to the problem. Need to say a quick prayer for balance....

Peace.

The Great Equalizer

2006-10-04T20:29:00.000-05:00

Let's see..... Who's right?

Horace Mann (U.S. educator, the first great American advocate of public education, 1796-1859):
"Education, then, beyond all other devices of human origin, is the great equalizer of the conditions of men, the balance-wheel of the social machinery." OR

William Osler (Canadian physician, 1849-1919):
"Work is the open sesame of every portal, the great equalizer in the world, the true philosopher's stone which transmutes all the base metal of humanity into gold."

Booker T. Washington: "The world cares very little about what a man or woman knows; it is what a man or woman is able to do that counts...At the bottom of education, at the bottom of politics, even at the bottom of religion, there must be for our race economic independence... Dignify and glorify common labor. It is at the bottom of life that we must begin, not at the top." OR

W.E.B. DuBois:
"The purpose of education is not to make men carpenters, but to make carpenters men...It is the trained, living human soul, cultivated and strengthened by long study and thought, that breathes the real breath of life into boys and girls and makes them human, whether they be black or white, Greek, Russian or American...All men cannot go to college but some men must; every isolated group or nation must have its yeast, must have for the talented few centers of training where men are not so mystified and befuddled by the hard and necessary toil of earning a living, as to have no aims higher than their bellies, and no God greater than Gold."

Seems like we've been having this debate for years, ever since the distinction was made between Cain (who was a hunter, a man of the field, Daddy's dude) and Abel (who was a 'Momma's boy', a good cook). But this issue has great import for Black inner city youth today, whose futures are being decided in part by schools that are being created in their neighborhoods. Some folks have given up hope that teens from the 'ghetto' have what it takes to go to college, so they posit a career-focused education, pushing schools that will teach these youth a trade and give them skills to earn a 'living'. Still others see the disadvantage of telling Black kids they don't have to go to college: when 90% of the fastest-growing jobs in this country require some post-secondary education, when factory jobs that could once be relied on to 'pay a good wage' are now either overseas or no longer needed in a hyper-techno age, it seems kinda sick to push something that these same folks wouldn't want for their own kids. Yet, the reality of the ghetto is hard. If kids historically have been dropping out of school because they're unprepared for the academic rigor and social demands, might it not be wise to tap into a possible desire for a hands-on kinda education, in order to motivate the youth to stay in school and then give them something for their time in high school? I dunno. Would love to hear what others think.

Feel like the Queen of Quotes today, but I haveta share this W.E.B. Du Bois one (Bill Cosby wasn't the first to utter such statements):
"A little less complaint and whining, and a little more dogged work and manly striving, would do us more credit than a thousand civil rights bills."

BUILD - Week Two

2006-09-23T21:14:00.000-05:00

Um, today was the second session of this very interesting, thought-provoking discussion of race and class issues. There was much more discussion than last week (though last week's dialogue was normal for a first gathering), but I'll be glad when the white folks in the group become comfortable enough to speak up more and, yes, to even debate a little more than they are doing now. This is not to say that there weren't some comments made by non-Blacks in the group. However, the talk time was overwhelmingly dominated by us African-Americans. Now, I understand a little of the why. It's difficult to speak immediately about a reality that isn't yours. So it stands to reason that Sheretta (?), Cherice, Keith, and I will have a lot of insight to shed since we've lived life in the 'ghetto'. And, there's the element (blessing and curse) that white folks don't want to say anything 'stupid' or insensitive that will give the impression that they are racist or uncaring. However, in order for I think true understanding to take place and honest dialogue to occur, there has to be the freedom to open up and to bear one's soul, no matter the risk of being misunderstood. I'm wondering whether or not we'll get to this depth of discussion during the next two months. I doubt it. It's rare for me to get to this level of sharing even w. my Christian friends who are white. (Gina is probably the exception) What a shame! But, again, another dreadful residual of horrible race relations in this country. Maybe some sort of social situation outside of these meetings will help break down some barriers.......

Another thought from today's session: I'm not comfortable being one of the (unoffiicially) designated 'spokespeople' for our race. Just when I've shared some 'insight' on inner city behavior, I start to think about the members of my race, even in the ghetto, who don't fit that stereotyped behavior, and I begin to fear I've given the impression that the Black race is a monolith and I've set up white folks unfairly for thinking they now 'understand' the why behind some things my people do. For instance, today we talked about how many Black mothers may appear not-so-nurturing because they push their children towards independence early on (i.e., encouraging them not to cry and having them take the lead in 'mature' situations like going to the doctors alone or dropping them off on a college campus alone and leaving them). On my way home, and later in the day, I thought about two caveats. One is that part of some Black mothers' insistence on their children taking on 'adult' responsibilities (like my doctor's office example) is a lack of comfort dealing w. mainstream culture. This is seen more clearly in Hispanic or Latino cultures when you have children paying bills and talking to school personnel and landlords and other authority figures -- things parents should be doing but cannot due to a language barrier. Well, the same is true in African-American poor 'hoods b.c. some adults are not comfortable engaging w. doctors and school officials, etc., so they put off that duty to children/youth (unfair, but a reality). Another thought around this issue is that there is an irony in some Black mothers' parenting of boys. Despite efforts early on to make sons 'tough' and make them into a 'man', many Black mothers paradoxically fail to hold their sons to the same standard of accountability that they hold their daughters to. For this reason, it is not uncommon to find in many homes daughters who manage to finish high school (and even go on to college), hold jobs, etc., while the sons in the same family lounge around, do nothing, make babies out of wedlock, and live off their mothers (who go to work everyday to support them). There's a saying that we Black mothers raise our daughters and spoil our sons. So this I think is another factor that plays into the problem of single-parenthood in our communities.

One final note: I noticed a tendency on the part of one person in our group (white) to dodge discussions that geared towards pointing out flaws in Black inner city culture. When we Black folks started talking, for instance, about how in many Black churches personal godliness is compromised while social justice is highlighted (the opposite of what was said to be true of white evangelical churches), the conversation was cut short w. a comment that all cultures have their pet sins (that's not the right word, maybe common manifestations of sin). This is true. But, this was one of maybe two or three times today where I think the person wanted to stay away from any criticism of the Black community. Again, I can understand why. When the tendency has been to blame the victim, which leads to no solutions, there is wisdom in shying away from any talk of personal responsibility. But, if personal responsibility is at all a part of the solution, and I believe it is, then neglecting this piece is actually detrimental to the Black community. Case in point: A Christian school w. a strong social justice bent consistently made excuses as to why parents could not do things like get their kids to school on time, or return schoolbooks in their kids' bookbags (both of which were paid for by the school), or make sure their kids came to school in their uniforms daily. And help w. homework (talking about for third graders) was out of the question. Why? Because the socio-economic situation was so terrible that these basics were thought to be impossible. Knowing the parents well, this was the case for about three families out of a school of a couple of hundred. The result? Kids' education suffered, even in a private and Christian setting (small class size, caring teachers, Christ-centered and safe culture), because parents were 'excused' from taking any responsibility. Yet some of those same parents, who later took their kids to a charter school down the street, miraculously displayed behavior needed to give their children a little more success educationally. My point? Balance is needed. No, personal accountability is not the SOLE answer to issues of race and class. Those problems are too complex for a single solution and too historically caused and instititutionally maintained to just urge people to change their own behaviors and 'things'll be alright'. Yet, structural causes are not the SOLE answer, either. So, if there are multiple causes, there must be multiple solutions, all of which are pursued w. the same level of vehemence and integrity and diligence. It is paternalistic to think Black folks can't do basic stuff just because they're poor. And you hurt the very poor folks you're trying to serve when you excuse their behavior that perpetuates their condition. Just my thoughts....

"The hood can be a beautiful thing/
But with no Christ in the city/It ain't pretty/
What the future will bring/
We need more than Malcolm X and Martin Luther the King/
We need Davids walking the pavement with Truth in their sling/
We see a chance to give people a reason for the hope of believers/
Cause though they're breathin' these hopeless people are grievin'/
In the streets some are numb but others are still bothered/
At the unfit mothers and the unskilled fathers/
That's why we plug Christ like an unskilled barber/
Rap artists who harvest, some plant and some will water/
But God'll make it grow and it won't stop/
If He's the center like the gum in a blow pop/
Remember you're eternal but your dough's not/
Your rims, your Timbs, your brims and your clothes rot"
-- Cross Movement, Higher Definition, "Hey, Y'all"

Example of what I'm talking about

2006-09-16T20:12:00.000-05:00

Below is a quote from Marcus Garvey that demonstrates how some black leaders of old had no problem stressing personal responsibility alongside critiquing the white racist power structure. (Note: This quote is not meant to be a support of Garvey's philosophy or tactics, especially his emphasis on segregation and his KKK connection. It's simply one example of how many respected Black leaders back in the day, of which he was one, had a strong self-reliant bent.)

From “Self-Reliance and Respect”:
“The Universal Negro Improvement Association teaches our race self-help and self-reliance, not only in one essential, but in all those things that contribute to human happiness and well-being. The disposition of the many to depend upon the other races for a kindly and sympathetic consideration of their needs, without making the effort to do for themselves, has been the race's standing disgrace by which we have been judged and through which we have created the strongest prejudice against ourselves...
The Negro must be up and doing if he will break down the prejudice of the rest of the world. Prayer alone is not going to improve our condition, nor the policy of watchful waiting. We must strike out for ourselves in the course of material achievement, and by our own effort and energy present to the world those forces by which the progress of man is judged.”
- The Right Excellent Marcus Mosiah Garvey -

BUILD First Impressions

2006-09-16T19:37:00.000-05:00

Today was the first meeting of a group of Christians interested in social justice issues and committed to reading about and discussing them openly for the next two months. First impressions? Not bad. My main concern was that I'd be the only African-American in the group and, therefore, would be seen as the object of pity and/or as the authority on all things inner city. Pleased to find the group pretty diverse (I did the racial/ethnic & gender count -- wish it wasn't so instinctive!), and for a first meeting, I thought some folks were appropriately vulnerable. Interesting (though not shocking) that some African-Americans in the group honestly voiced frustrations with members of our race in the neighborhood who display stereotypical behaviors... One guy knows quite a few folks I know -- the Wests, the Bergs -- which is kewl. Good people. Main take-away from today's time: Michael's comments. Specifically, his admonition that the next two months will be worthless if we don't put into practice whatever it is we learn. Kinda jolting. Sobering. His words really resonated with me because they are true, yet they scared me a bit because truth revealed must be followed out by truth applied and, as Tae said, I don't know what that looks like or even if I want to. Though the inner city has been my life from birth almost, that does not necessarily translate into my doing all I can to share in God's love for folks in the city and that love translating into action....

First impressions of the reading? Well, I'm about halfway thru Hilfiker's article on poverty in urban America, but I'm struck by how much of it I didn't know (I knew a good deal of it, but not some major points). Wasn't familiar with the origin of public housing; just assumed projects were started by some altruistic motive. Was aware that domestic workers didn't qualify for social security or unemployment compensation. My grandmother was a day worker for Jewish folks her whole life and, though she worked hard, never had social security, a pension, etc. But I wasn't aware that the federal programs during the depression specifically excluded these folks, which translated into lack of relief during a very rough time in America that other groups were afforded.

Since my time in seminary, my views on the causes of poverty and the inner city problems have slowly changed from almost totally blaming the victim (the whole family breakdown / single-parent homes thing) to seeing both personal and structural/institutional causes. Lupton's article further reinforced my moderate position. Yet, I still grapple with how to move people out of poverty if too much emphasis is placed on external causes. My fear is that while work is done to alleviate the effects of external conditions, folks in poverty will perpetuate their condition if a heavy dose of personal responsibility is not given as well. My mind goes back to Black leaders even who were clear about structural causes for poverty and other problems and who spoke out against them vehemently, yet who were just as passionate when they stressed personal responsibility to folks in their own community. Yet today, any Black person who brings up personal responsibility is seen as a sell out (like Bill Cosby). Folks would do well to read some speeches and writings of our leaders of the past who said the same things. I'm interested in what next week's discussion will be like and whether or not people will be honest and risk airing differences of viewpoints. Actually, I think it would be a good idea to set up some group norms before more controversial discussions begin.

One final thing: We're supposed to note anything of interest regarding race and class. Well, I have two things. One is the fact that this season on "Survivor", the tribes will be divided by race as they compete against each other. I'm curious as to what people think about that. Second, in the laundromat today washing clothes, I did the usual: read the newspapers. In the Wednesday Journal (a local newspaper for Oak Park and other west suburbs), there was a commentary on the achievement gap at Oak Park-River Forest High School. The writer acknowledged multiple causes of the fact that Blacks consistently underperform whites and others, even in an affluent and diverse community like O.P. However, the writer was concerned about the persistent refusal of O.P.-R.F. H.S. staff to even consider the possibility of teacher and faculty bias (intentional or not) as one of the many causes of this gap. Again, I'd like to know folks' thoughts on this matter.

Well, that's all for now. I'm tired.

Valaida Snow

2006-07-09T17:32:00.000-05:00

I get mixed emotions whenever I learn something new that I feel should've been taught to me as a youngster. I'm excited about the new knowledge, curiosity piqued and then satisfied as part of the previously unknown is unveiled. But I'm also frustrated by the fact that, esp. when it comes to African-American history, all too often the story of our people has been grossly ignored and neglected. Here's someone very interesting that I learned about last year. This woman often returns to my thoughts -- find myself wondering what her life was like, what motivated her and inspired her and irritated her. Think she should be included in the annals of American music history. Here goes (taken from various sources on the Internet):

"'Queen of the Trumpet', Valaida Snow was born on June 2nd in 1905. She was an African-American musician and entertainer. From Cleveland City, Tennessee she was raised in an intensely musical family. Snow was taught by her mother Etta Washington Snow to play cello, bass, violin, banjo, mandolin, harp, accordion, clarinet, saxophone and trumpet. She also sang and danced. By the time she was 15 years old she was entertaining professionally and had decided to concentrate on trumpet and vocals. She had two sisters and three brothers. Both her sisters and one brother were also professional singers. A third brother and a half-brother never sang professionally or played an instrument of any kind.

Feisty, flamboyant and beautiful, Snow managed her own career, played half a dozen instruments, and spoke several languages. Snow was also gifted with an uncannily perfect pitch. The story is told of how she told pianist Eubie Blake that his regular tuning fork was flat simply after hearing him strike while they were together on a train. When they got to the next stop, Blake rushed her to the nearest music shop where the music dealer confirmed Snow's assessment.

Her truth-is-stranger-than-fiction story takes us from her Vaudeville youth in the Jim Crow South to stardom in black musical theatre. By the 1930s, she was an international headliner, and like her more well-known contemporary Josephine Baker, had caused a sensation in Europe.
A review of one of her engagements in the London Express of 1934 proclaimed: "She has a big personality, wails your tear ducts dry, blows a mean trumpet, and conducts as Toscannini never could." Along with Baker, she was a daring pioneer in an expatriation movement of Black entertainers that made both international stars and helped to eventually turn the tide of acceptance back in the US. In the Netherlands, Queen Wilhelmina was so impressed with Snow's talent and flair that she presented the American with a gilded trumpet.

In 1924 Snow attracted attention in the Sissle and Blake show. Then she was in London with Blackbirds, recording with Johnny Claes, Derek Neville, Freddy Gardner and others. She also worked in China and after her return to the USA she headlined in Chicago and Los Angeles before rejoining the Blackbirds in Paris. Snow also played across Europe and in Russia.

In the early 30s she was performing in the Ethel Waters show, Rhapsody In Black, in New York. In the mid-30s she returned to London and then to Hollywood, where she made films with her husband Ananais Berry of the Berry Brothers dancing troupe. After playing New York's Apollo Theater she revisited Europe and the Far East for more shows and films.

Flamboyant, Snow dressed in elegant gowns, traveled in an orchid-colored Mercedes limousine, and outfitted her chauffer and pet monkey in orchid-colored clothes. She became the toast of Paris and London, and was courted by French superstar Maurice Chevalier and American bandleader Earl Hines . She was a savvy businesswoman and spoke seven languages. While her beauty attracted audiences, it was Snow's incredible talent as a jazz trumpeter which truly captivated them. She obtained the nickname "Little Louis" due to her Louis Armstrong-like playing style.

In 1939 while in Scandinavia, Snow was arrested by the invading Germans and interned in a concentration camp at Wester-Faengle. After 18 months she was released as an exchange prisoner and returned to New York. After her return from prison, Snow married Earle Edwards. Damaged both physically and psychologically, she began performing again. Sadly, the spark and vitality that had made her one of the outstanding American entertainers of the 30s had begun to dim.

In her prime, Snow had perfect pitch and was also a skilled transcriber and arranger. Snow played and sang the blues with deep feeling and could more than hold her own on up-tempo swingers. As a phenomenal musician, because she was a woman in the jazz world of the 30s and 40s, she was regarded as something of a curiosity. Valaida Snow died May 30, 1956 in New York City. Strangely enough, she was buried three days later, on her birthday, June 2.

Even today, many jazz fans have difficulty accepting women as anything other than vocalists despite an increasing number of excellent female soloists now recording and performing.
Valaida Snow, almost universally unknown or forgotten today, forged a multiple-threat career - trumpeter and singer, bandleader, dancer, choreographer and arranger. With three strikes against her (she was Black; she was a woman and she was a bandleader), Valaida Snow still managed to hit home runs and she did it by most accounts, with a sly smile. The great American pianist Earl "Fatha" Hines (who also romanced Snow) said of her "She was just a beautiful and exceptionally talented woman.""

Ginny Owens

2006-07-09T17:00:00.000-05:00

Looking for some quality Christian music to satisfy your listening pleasure? Then check out contemporary Christian artist Ginny Owens. Tho' she has about 6 albums out, my favorite is Without Condition. Whether singing her own rendition of the traditional hymn "Be Thou My Vision" or belting out the lyrics to a gritty "Symbol of a Lost Cause", you're sure to love every track on this record. I'm known for having 'remote control' tendencies when it comes to listening to music; never listen to an entire CD -- skip around so much sometimes I don't even finish one song. But this record is different. Here's what one reviewer said:

"Ginny Owens is a rare find in the Christian Music industry. Blinded since a very young age, Owens could have taken a bitter view of God*, yet she didn't, and am I thankful for that. Owens is one of those artists who can dig deep into my soul and say exactly what I am thinking without having ever met her. Taking on the piano as her major tool for writing, Owens sings with such simplicity and ease, like she knows what she's talking about. The CD starts off with an accapella version of "Be Thou My Vision", which is beautiful yet haunting at the same time. The next track on the CD..."I Wanna Be Moved" is one of those songs I was talking about earlier, one that says exactly what I am thinking at the right time. The song is an edgy rock-influenced song speaking of how Owens doesn't "want to be a flame", but rather she wants to be a "raging fire". This is just a small taste of what is to come. While Ginny does a great job on the edgy stuff, she really shows her songwriting muscles on her ballads. Songs like "I Am Nothing", "Someone Searching" and "If You Want Me To" truly show her desire to live a life that is holy and blameless before Christ... "Own Me"...[is a] beautiful, subtle song about how she prays God will take complete control of her life, mold her, break her, and heal her. I highly recommend this album..."

My sentiments exactly.

*Ginny went to college to become a music teacher, only to be frustrated by potential employers who saw only her blindness rather than her gifts. While playing the piano alone, someone walked in unbeknownedst to her, heard her, was blown away, and offered her a record deal. Ginny then shifted her aspirations, and I'm so glad she did.

Poem

2006-06-24T21:37:00.000-05:00

I'm not much of a poet -- only written a handful of halfway decent poems in my life, and this is one. Wanna hear it? Here it go........

PROVERBS 32

The next one
Will be the best one
Nothing like the ones before
Sold out
Able to hold out
Not just looking for a cheap ‘score’

Not simply knowing
But also growing
True in his thoughts, words, and his deeds
Faithful in keeping
All that he’s speaking
Meek enough to follow
Strong enough to lead

Inspiring reverence
Just by his presence
Known for his heart, more than head or hand
Balanced in his living
Caring and forgiving
A truly godly kind of man

Not drenched with pride
Secure on the inside
But also solid in his outer affairs
Yet not chasing the ‘dream’
Focusing on what’s unseen
Not choked by fleeting, worldly cares

Forever serving
Never swerving
In his goal to reach the lost
Lavish risk-taking
In his disciple-making
Pouring out his soul, no matter the cost

Yet always working
To keep from hurting
The fragile ties to family
Showing his love
Placing home far above
Even the noblest ministry

At peace in his skin
With who he is, where he’s been
Learning from – not living in – times past
Fully embracing
Not afraid of facing
Today and tomorrow with strength to last

Yep, the next one
Will be the best one
Nothing like the ones before
Loving me sweetly
Loving me deeply
But loving his God
So very much more.

The Making of a Man (or Woman)

2006-04-25T20:29:00.000-05:00

A wise man in the faith once told me, "God is interested in making men -- not ministries." Now I'm sure Elder Taurel borrowed that saying from someone else, but God certainly used him to speak it into my spirit that day. And the meaning of those words has never left me. Rather than concern ourselves with God making a name for us -- with using God for our own glory, for our own agenda -- it's better to concern ourselves with God making US -- with His molding us and shaping us into His Son's likeness. After all, that's what Romans 8 says God's all about. That famous "all things works together for good" passage has less to do with God guaranteeing us a happy ending (on our terms) and more with God guaranteeing us His ending, which seems to be forming a people who reflect His nature and character to the world, so that then the world can be drawn to Him and more folks can join in worship of Him. And to accomplish this purpose, God will leave no stone unturned (in the words of another wise man in the faith, Pastor Reeves).

When I search the Scriptures to find someone who was formed by the Master's hand, molded into a man displaying God's character, my man Moses comes to mind. From Moses' birth it was obvious that God's hand was on the brother, protecting him from the vicious decrees of a fearful Pharoah and securing his physical and spiritual safety by paradoxically arranging for his earthly upbringing in Pharoah's house and for his moral training by his nurse who happened to be his mother.

The first picture we get of Moses himself shows a man in whom resided a strong sense of compassion and justice. Moses, who obviously has been told he is a Hebrew, sets out to learn of the condition of his people. Acts 7 says at age 40 "it entered his mind to visit his brothers, the sons of Israel" (nothing but God's Sovereignty at work). Incensed at an Egyptian overseer who is beating a fellow Hebrew, Moses intervenes, almost like he can't help himself. (Acts 7:24 says, "And when he saw one of them being treated unjustly, he defended him and took vengeance for the oppressed by striking down the Egyptian.") He ends up killing the Egyptian and burying him in the sand, in order to help rescue his fellow Hebrew. The next day, this same streak of fairness and compassion comes oozing out of Moses again, this time spreading to his own people in the form of a rebuke (sign of a God-implanted trait -- it doesn't discriminate). Moses spies two Hebrews fighting and makes an effort to solve the problem (Acts 7:26 says he "tried to reconcile them in peace"), only to get his first taste in Disappointment 101: his own people reject his efforts to help, and even cast a stinging false accusation about his motives (trying to be prince and judge over us), rather than admit their own fault and reconcile with one another. One of these Hebrews even lets Moses know he's aware of the murder Moses committed the day before, a comment that, along with the disillusionment of trying to help and seemingly not making a difference, sends this man reeling into the desert far away from the powers that be who wanted to retaliate and away from the realization that his efforts to rescue were spurned by the very ones he wanted to help. (Acts 7:25 says, "And he supposed that his brothers understood that God was granting them deliverance through him, but they did not understand.")

But Moses cannot escape the ingrained tendency to rescue -- even while away from Egypt, we see him rescuing Jethro's daughters from men who bothered them when they were at the well. In fact, that's what these sisters tell their daddy -- that 'an Egyptian' helped (literally, delivered) them that day. Again, Moses' sense of compassion and justice could not bear the thought of defenseless women being bothered. ("Then the shepherds came and drove them [the sisters] away, but Moses stood up and helped them and watered their flock." -- Exodus 2:17)

Reading about Moses' sense of inadequacy, so much so that God seemingly gets frustrated trying to convince Moses to take the job of leading Israel, is a testament to the power of God to 'make a man'. And so is seeing how God developed Moses, from the firebrand murderer in
Egypt to the shepherd on the backside of the mountain (plus being an alien and a father), even to being a long-suffering leader of millions of Hebrews. Far from Moses being the star of this narrrative, though, God is the Hero. He shines through as the True Deliverer (He tells Moses HE'S going down to deliver Israel, in the same conversation where He commissions Moses to go, so it's clear who's in control), as the One who is moved by the cries of His oppressed people, as the powerful One who decimates one of the greatest civilizations of all time in order that they may know that He is God. Even though Acts 7:35 tells us that "this Moses whom they disowned, saying, 'Who made you a ruler and a judge?' is the one whom God sent to be both a ruler and a deliverer...", we are also told that Moses did this "with the help of the angel who appeared to him in the thorn bush" (same verse), and we hear God's words to Moses about Himself saying, "I have certainly seen the oppression of My people in Egypt and have heard their groans, and I have come down to rescue them; come now, and I will send you to Egypt." The beauty of all this is that the spirit of a deliverer or rescuer that resided in Moses actually came from God -- Moses could have such compassion on folks and have such a strong desire for fair treatment of all because that's what His heavenly Father had. And, His heavenly Father enabled Him to act on that spirit and bless others.

Another Claude McKay Creation

2006-04-24T19:22:00.000-05:00

Here is another tight sonnet by this thorough Harlem Renaissance brothuh:

The White House

Your door is shut against my tightened face,
And I am sharp as steel with discontent;
But I possess the courage and the grace
To bear my anger proudly and unbent.
The pavement slabs burn loose beneath my feet,
A chafing savage, down the decent street;
And passion rends my vitals as I pass,
Where boldly shines your shuttered door of glass.
Oh, I must search for wisdom every hour,
Deep in my wrathful bosom sore and raw,
And find in it the superhuman power
To hold me to the letter of your law!
Oh, I must keep my heart inviolate
Against the potent poison of your hate.

My Luv, Tha Verse

2006-04-24T18:55:00.000-05:00

Okay, so I'm in love w. words. Just the way I'm wired, I guess. But words on a page speak to me and enthrall me. Maybe that's why I'm such a hip hop head. Words seem to jump from the page into my head and fill it w. fanciful images. I'm such a 'linguistic learner' that I can hardly imagine what it's like for those who don't share this learning mode. I guess there are those as excited about numbers and patterns as I am about language.

Proof of my love: Tho' poetry's far from my favorite genre, these dudes speak to me: Paul Laurence Dunbar (he's one of the people I'd like to meet one day, but it'll have to be in eternity now), Claude McKay, and then there are poets of our time like Billy Joel, Barry Manilow, Elton John, and just about any balladeer (whether it's Ghostface Killa dedicating a song to his moms or it's No Doubt or Linkin' Park screamin' out a ballad, I actually feel the words). Well, 'nuf said.

Time to close w. one of my favorites, this tight Shakespearean / Elizabethan sonnet by Jamaican - American poet Claude McKay:

The Harlem Dancer

Applauding youths laughed with young prostitutes
And watched her perfect, half-clothed body sway;
Her voice was like the sound of blended flutes
Blown by black players upon a picnic day.
She sang and danced on gracefully and calm,
The light gauze hanging loose about her form;
To me she seemed a proudly-swaying palm
Grown lovelier for passing through a storm.
Upon her swarthy neck black shiny curls
Luxuriant fell; and tossing coins in praise,
The wine-flushed, bold-eyed boys, and even the girls,
Devoured her shape with eager, passionate gaze;
But looking at her falsely-smiling face,
I knew her self was not in that strange place.

I'm out!

Two More Good Books

2006-04-21T17:55:00.000-05:00

Eh, here are the latest good books I'm reading:

1) Jim Collins' Good To Great. This book was recommended to me by so many people in the past and finally I'm getting to it. Well, it's definitely worth the wait! This Collins dude led a team of over twenty heads who researched businesses for five years. Their goal was to find traits that took companies from 'good to great'. Very surprising results for them, but not for me. The celebrity, cult-like business leader w. the savior complex who comes from the outside and rescues the company? NOT! Big myth, in terms of companies that have sustained productivity. Instead, these good to great companies are led by shy, self-effacing, almost nerdy yet focused and diligent folks who have a combo of personal humility and professional will. Tho' they are 'more workhorse than showhorse' (love that dang quote!), they fiercely, courageously make tough decisions and sacrifice their fame for the company's success and longevity. This is just a taste of the findings!

2) Stephen Ambrose's Eisenhower: Soldier and President. Good, readable, tho' long as heck look at our 34th Prez -- brief details of his upbringing and then tons of stuff on his leadership. Good read for non-history buffs like myself -- interesting enough to hold your attention and give you insight on this man and the situations he governed in this country and in the world.

What Do You See? by the Ambassador (Cross Movement's Human Emergency album)

2006-04-16T22:20:00.001-05:00

Hear the CLINK! of the nails as they pierce His hands / And the…lash as they slash this man /
Crash this man, hit and harass this man / Bash, stick and inflict mad gashes and /
Mentally put yourself at the place and time / Use faith as a way to trace the crime /
Let your mind take you back laps and laps / Back track till your mind sees back to back /
All the things that happ'd / To the silent Lamb /
All in chains, trapped like a violent man / Like He forwarded a violent plan /
But it was prophecy / That said God would be /
Treated like unwanted property / You’ve got to see /
The ill way that they flogged Him / Blood leaked, it was deep how they mobbed Him /
Think thorns worn as a crown / Here the Jews say, “Crucify Him pass it down” /
Hear the squeals as the steel comes crashin’ down / Can’t get past the sound /
Teeth are gnashing now / Veins snap, feel that, hot flashin’ now /
Draped in blood, covered in a cap and gown /
So many cracks from the straps / It numbs the back /
Crucifixion makes your lungs collapse /
Watch His chest---see Him gasp for breath / Hear Him…and…till there’s no gasp left /

Chorus: What do you see when you close your eyes /What will you see when your life goes by /
Think hard / Visualize the ill mob / Either you’ll feel God/ Or your heart's real hard /

Concentrate, your mind should stay in study mode / Tell your buddies, “roll” /
As you contemplate the bloody robe /
Which was worn by the One beaten and torn / Killed by the same dust people He formed /
He emptied Himself---paused the wealth / Put independent use of His attributes on the shelf /
Loving men who weren’t loving Him / Loving sin /
Loving gin / Lovin’ a night at the club again /
I’m rubbin' men wrong but souls will die / If my rhyme doesn’t come in and blow your high /
I’m right in the sight of Jehovah’s eye / So the gospel I’ll tell till I’m old and dry /
The world’s cold like a frozen pie / With little sense like missing your ears, tongue, nose, and eyes /
But back to the ugliest things you’ve ever heard of / The murder of the One who took more flack than Roberta /
They came in droves / Cats had His veins exposed /
Played a game where they claimed His robe / Eyes swoll, even rearranged His nose /
Only Providence helped Him sustain the blows /
Are y'all seeing the One who owns it all / The King getting beaten in the Roman halls /
Headed for a Roman cross, and heaven is His home and all /But He wouldn’t give His home a call /
Soon to dislocate His bones and all / And still wouldn’t wish for His opponents' fall /
Ahhh!---tired and thirsty too / Blood lost on a cross in His birthday suit /
As He droops, pooped from attempts to breathe / I grieve/ Tears stop my attempts to read /
The sign hanging over Him limp and weak/ It’s (Memphis) bleak /
How could this have been meant to be? /

Repeat Chorus

No time to blink, just continue to think of Scripture / Let it convict ya /
Focus, get in the picture /
Watch it blow you square off the Ricter / As it teaches you of the real Victor /
Who prevails /You hear the crucifixion details /
Now ask yourself why’s your life still derailed / And why we fail /
To live for the One we nailed / This same Jesus, you know the One we Hail /
With our lips but not with our lives / Time to see with the heart and not with our eyes /
See the Son, the One, who was hung like a poster / Was buried, but popped up like a toaster /
Got all the host of heaven makin’ a toast ta /The King of kings who brings God and men closer /
Sin’s roped ya, guns out the holster / Can’t stay alive even with John Travolta /
Now I hope ta / Pull y'all off the sofa / Cut the TVs pause the CDs, the culture's /
In the midst of a raging storm / The rage is on, obituary page is long /
Life is short, casket sales are high / No surprise that the numbers in the jails are high /
On the streets anything you want they’ll supply / That’s why beer, crack and weed sales are high /
Love songs making you wail and cry / Number of pregnant single females is high /
Youth get high---deal just to get by / Doing street corner business with no suit & tie /
It’s “do or die”, truth or lie, you and I / Refuse to try, and trust the Crucified /

Repeat Chorus

Limitations

2006-04-16T21:35:00.000-05:00

"I don't mean no harm/But I'll bet the farm/

Some put the weight of the Mission*/On skill and charm"

I've been meditating lately on Cross Movement's words in the lyrics above (Holy Culture album, "In Not Of"). Like these brothers noticed, there's a tendency in the world today (and I'm guilty of it, too), to put an emphasis on human capital rather than divine capital to meet the challenges of the day and even to do God's own work. Yes, I see it every day, when folks with external critiera but without depth of character are selected over the humble and godly who may lack certain trappings (maybe not as smooth or socially adroit as the next man). I've also been checking out my boy Allistair Begg's series on weakness (TruthForLife.org) and being blessed by his assertion that our limitations (not our sins) may very well be the key to God's use of us. On top of all this (or really, on the bottom of it -- the foundation) has been my own meditation on Hannah, a thorough woman of God, and her prayer in I Samuel 2 (about God using the least likely -- the poor, beggars, barren, etc. -- rather than princes and so forth).

Now, I'm all about doing God's business w. excellence, but I've noticed a trend in the church that has taken its cues from the world, and that is placing a premium on human ability rather than God's when it comes to doing God's work. For instance, all too often, a pastor is selected because he is able to sway a crowd emotionally, not because of his heart for ministering to folks or because of his love of the truth of God's Word. It's like, how good can you hoop, how stirred up can you get the audience, how clever can you speak -- instead of, how faithful can you be visiting the elderly who are in nursing homes and unable to come to church (giving to those you can't get anything from), how dedicated to your calling can you be when you can make way more dough in the business world, how humble can you be when you have an elder board that really holds you accountable and is there for checks and balances, and how accurately can you communicate the heart of God -- not tainting it w. your own agenda, even your own 'cause'. More often than not, a person's looks, even their education or personality, are given more weight than their lifestyle and heart for God and for people when selecting someone to serve in leadership. And then we wonder what went wrong when there's tons of damage control to be done when the leader of our choosing's flaws become evident.

Reminds me of Saul, the people's choice. Tho' God told Israel that He was their King, they wanted the assurance that comes from external symbols (don't we all?). So they got what they wanted, human king Saul, even tho' God told them what the outcome of a human king would be (exploitation of your crops/land, your children, and so on -- and it seems it's been that way ever since, but I digress). Things weren't right until David came along, and He was God's real choice -- though he was young and inexperienced and the least likely among his brothers. (Ironically, David later became 'the people's champ'.)

How's all this affecting me? Well, it's causing me to examine myself and make sure I'm really trusting in the Lord rather than trusting in myself and my abilities or in a person or in earthly systems, etc. to meet my God-given needs (whether financially, spiritually, socially, career-wise, ministry-wise, whatever) and reach my God-given goals. When I say things like: God can't possibly be calling me to that because I can't see how it could work, or I know I'm in God's will but I feel the most inadequate than I've ever felt in my life, I have to pause and remind myself that no, I am not adequate, but if God tells me to do it, then He will make me adequate. Wasn't adequate for motherhood (far from it, w. my anti-maternal self), but God giveth grace. Wasn't adequate for Yale, this child of the ghetto (and I'm the kinda girl where you can take me outta the ghetto but you can't take the ghetto outta me), but God giveth grace. Um, just about everything that I've set out to do (whether finishing my last 2 years at Yale as a single mom or going to Dallas seminary as a single mom or teaching w.o ever taking 1 teaching class or moving into educ. admin. or discipling folks or speaking in front of folks), I've not been up to the task, and that's driven me to the Savior's arms. Now, the outcome hasn't been smooth sailing, but it's been w. a peace that I've followed God's will and a confidence that He's been / being made to shine. As Wangui reminded me, whenever I DON'T feel like I'm up to the task on my own strength, then there's problems b.c. I'm likely being prideful and will ride on my own strength -- not rest in the Lord's. Thanks for aptly spoken, wise words from friends.

It's so easy to fall into the trap of trying to do God's work my way -- to have a great, God-given goal, but to pursue it by resorting to less than godly tactics (like Abe trying to fulfill God's promise of a son by committing adultery w. Hagar). God's business has to be done God's way. God's just as concerned with how we get there as to where we're going. So, I can't begin in the Spirit, with a godly aim, and try to conclude in the flesh, by trusting in what seems like a sure fire method of getting there that doesn't honor God.

I'm beginning to see that my own limitations are really opportunities for God to be magnified. Like Paul did in II Corinthians, I'm starting to see the wisdom in rejoicing in my limitations rather than bemoaning them. My crazy upbringing is nothing to apologize for (heck, I didn't choose the family I was born into nor did I have any control over the choices of the adults who were responsible for rearing me). Instead, my background is something to accept and let God use -- and the more I rest in that, the more God uses that part of my life. My daughter's disability is not a sign of my weak faith, or of God's punishment of me, or anything crazy like that. Though I pray for T's healing every day, I also must to an extent accept the challenges our lives bring and rejoice in the simple pleasures of her big smile, her mischievous ways, and the gifts God has planted even in her non-verbal self (and there are many when you have the eyes to see). My personality type, as quirky as it is, my preferences (and their eclectic nature), are not evidence of my oddness (tho' my siblings would disagree -- to them I've always been a bit strange :0) ), but of God's unique making of me, and the more I see that what I am not, and I am, are completely in the Master's control -- the more content and the more effective a sistuh will be.

*The Great Commission

Mad Praze

2006-04-16T21:25:00.000-05:00

Well, today's Resurrection Sunday, a.k.a. Easter, and I've been chillin' for most of the day. Fun time w. teens in Sunday School today and, tho' I missed Pastor J's sermon (I'll get the tape), also had a good time lending an impromptu hand in the nursery. Five little ones in there, along w. T, and I had fun holding each and every one of them. Babies just do something to me, which is weird 'cuz I'm not Ms. Maternal. Anyhoo, heart fulla mad praze 2 God today for His Son's awesome sacrifice. Can't understand it, esp. when it's so hard for me 2 4-give those who harm me intentionally. Mind-blowin', God's grace is. And wonderfully awe-inspiring how at the Cross there was the perfect intersection of God's holiness / justice and His mercy / compassion / grace. Reminds me of this song we useta sing in the ol' Baptist church I grew up in: "I don't know why Jesus loves me, I don't know why He cares for me, I don't know why He sacrificed His life, Oh, but I'm glad, so glad He did."

TIGHT LYRICS -- da T.R.U.T.H. ("The Faith" album)

2005-12-29T10:11:00.000-06:00

Was Christ really buried—is there a chance/
That He really married Mary and fled over to France?/
Did they really find His bones /
With a fine toothed comb/
Or did He walk out of His tomb to His throne?/
Was He God—was He not/Was He alive when they dropped /
Him in a tomb/ Did He swoon—was He moved?'/
Was He removed by delusional dudes /That refused /
To believe in the truth/Were they fools?/
Were the disciples hallucinating?/
Was the truth evaded/ ‘Cause they wanted to boost His ratings?/
Did the Catholic church from the Vatican work/
At keeping the bag of dirt /
Under the rug?/
Was He God from above?/ If He was.../
Do you blink, do you shrug?/
Do you hate, do you love? /
Christ on the poster/Christ of the culture/
Christ on the stained glass, Christ of the future /
Christ on the video/ Christ on the radio /
The Christ of Da Vinci/ What does he really know?/
Christ on award shows/ Christ that the Lord knows /
Christ that’s sure to come back in His war clothes/
In which Christ do you believe?/
You gotta know before you leave!/
YES he did arrive, YES He was alive/
NO —he wasn’t married, never had any wives/
YES—He did rise, days after He died/
What can I say—YES HE IS GOD!/
From the womb to the tomb, To His throne /
Nobody in Rome /
Could hold on to His bones/
'Cause there were no bones to be held, /
Though His bones were beheld/
Who would have known, It was Jehov on the DL /
Providing forgiveness, Our lives are offensive/
He died to put you and I in a friendship /
With himself, Pain is felt/
When the glorious gospel is exchanged for wealth/
Forget about how the spades were dealt/
And think about how you measure up when weighed on the scale /
One Lord, One faith I plug/
One Lord, One Christ, One Judge

OTHER GOOD BOOKS -- MY 2005 BEST READS

2005-12-28T17:42:00.000-06:00

Though these books were not all published in 2005, here's a list of some of the best books I've read this past year:
1) When Life and Beliefs Collide: How Knowing God Makes a Difference. Excellent book for women in particular, but for anyone struggling to make sense of their Christian faith in the midst of trials. Haven't read a book like this since Joni Eareckson Tada's When God Weeps.
2) The Devil in the White City: Murder, Magic, and Madness at the Fair that Changed America. I must admit, I like crime / mystery stuff that's a bit macabre. Again, this book is history written like fiction. It tells the story of two men who become famous for different reasons in Chicago in 1893. One man is one of the architects responsible for many buildings in the famous Chicago World's Fair. The other man is a now unknown, then infamous man who lived in the same place at the same time, but he was known for murder -- he was a serial killer with a twist (though he usually murdered women, he did so for money, a link missing in today's serial killers).
3) Israel on the Appomattox: A Southern Experiment in Black Freedom from the 1790s through the Civil War. Written by one of my history professors while at Yale (Melvin Ely), this book tells the true story of a group of Blacks who were freed AND given their own land, and this was as far back as 70 years before Emancipation. Blacks who were given their own land interacted with free whites, in business, in love relationships (yes, there were interracial marriages even then and interestingly, they were allowed to exist), even in religion. VERY LONG, but VERY INTERESTING.
4) Grace Matters: A Memoir of Faith, Friendship, and Hope in the Heart of the South, by Chris Rice. Excellent true story of a white man who learned about following God and life in the city through a friendship with a Black man, the son of famous Christian community developer John Perkins.
5) Power Lines: Two Years on South Africa's Borders. Jimmy Carter's grandson tells about his experiences in S. Africa (Peace Corps, I think) and shares lessons he learns about respecting others' cultures and how taking the time to learn someone's language can break down barriers.

GOOD BOOK

2005-12-28T17:36:00.000-06:00

Hey, one of the best books I've read of late is this one: CONTEMPT OF COURT: THE TURN-OF-THE-CENTURY LYNCHING THAT LAUNCHED 100 YEARS OF FEDERALISM. This book is history written in the form of a novel, and it tells the true story of Ed Johnson, a Black man wrongly accused of rape in Chattoonaga in 1906. Back then rape was a capital offense and lynching was the law of the land. Ed Johnson's rights were trampled on in a travesty of justice called his trial. (Read the book for details) Of course he was convicted, but two Black lawyers (with the help of a white one) took his case to the Supreme Court. The Supreme Court granted a temporary stay to Mr. Johnson's execution until the case could be looked into further. Unfortunately, Chattanooga Sheriff Shipp and his cohorts ignored the stay and allowed Johnson to fall victim to a lynch mob. The wonderful turn of events involved Shipp and a handful of others being found guilty of contempt of court. This happy outcome was anticlimactic though because the sentence was only 90 days in jail. Very interesting book if you want to know about what life was like for African-Americans at the turn of the century, particularly Black men, AND if you want to know how states' rights have historically been subject to federal authority.

ThaBerean

Can't Shake Tha West Side

Faves

What Difference Does A Black President Make?

Election Day

Woman to Woman: The Problem with Palin

They Got O.J.

I'm Related to Diddy

"Lakeview Terrace"

Fine Black Men

Exposure

On My Heart

"The River"

Hip Hop Chef

Wisdom

A Smile

Female Leadership

Is It Right?

Same Song, Different Verse: To JS

Taking A Break

What I'm Reading Now

Family Reunion

Fear, Sadness, and Outrage

Supremacy of Christ in Post modern Culture

What I'm Reading Now

PRAISES

Excitement

Akanksha

DA T.R.U.T.H. and Friends Live

Two Is Better Than One

Good Movie

Spades

Education Funding - Part II

Education Funding

Grandma

Why Conservatives Have a Bad Rep

Chris Rock

Musings on Community Development

More Than Serving Tea

Good Night

Irresponsible Parents

VA Tech Tragedy

BUILD - Part Two

Two Good Books

After Imus

Today's BUILD - Part One

Bet You Didn't Know...

Adult Advocacy

Of Imus and School Violence

Why Al Sharpton Is Popular (And Why It's Hard To Hold Onto Hope)

Langston Hughes - "I Dream A World"

I Dream A School

Why I Love Hip Hop

Good Read

Competing Interests

Suffering

A Glimpse of Heaven

IN MEMORIAM: Maryann Whitt

Someone Else's Eyes

HANNAH

JUST A WORD

Quality Education -- A Moral Imperative

"To Be Of Use", by Marge Piercy

More on BUILD

The Great Equalizer

BUILD - Week Two

Example of what I'm talking about

BUILD First Impressions

Valaida Snow

Ginny Owens

More Recommended Reading

Poem

The Making of a Man (or Woman)

Another Claude McKay Creation

My Luv, Tha Verse

Two More Good Books

What Do You See? by the Ambassador (Cross Movement's Human Emergency album)

Limitations

Mad Praze

TIGHT LYRICS -- da T.R.U.T.H. ("The Faith" album)