Exposure

Today I have the privilege of doing something that some folks might not delight in. But those whose background and upbringing are similar to mine will understand where I'm coming from...

About a month ago we ended the very first year of our new (start-up), small high school. We had the good fortune of starting this school from scratch, beginning with just freshmen (we'll add a grade each year). On purpose we are 'non- selective enrollment', which means we deliberately do not 'cream'. We exist for any student who chooses us, but we target students who normally would not test into our city's top tier high schools, but who still deserve a quality college-prep high school education. We have a long way to go, but last weekend I had one of my 'satisfying moments', one of those experiences that remind me I'm doing what I'm supposed to do. And today is part two of that experience.

I took four of my students to a suburban college to spend a week there at a business camp, learning about business and entrepreneurship, putting together a business plan, taking field trips to downtown businesses, and getting experience of what it's like to be on a college campus. I cannot tell you how excited I was for my students, but also how much I was reminded that lack of 'exposure' is a real reason why many of my people never make it to college.

First, there were more students than the four who went who had the opportunity to attend. Sadly, some parents did not grant permission to their youth to go. My colleagues and friends and I have discussed possible reasons why (that's a whole other blog), but the bottom line is that their fears and short-sightedness stand in the way of their kids' futures.

Second, cost was a real factor. This program is great, but like all summer college programs, there was a cost. The cost was $300., and students would get that money back at the end of the week, when they receive a $500. stipend for completing the program (I had to explain what a stipend was to one of my students -- the only one bold enough to ask/admit she didn't know what the word meant). My close friend and co-Sunday School teacher, whose daughter went, along with another church member, whose son went, were able to afford this cost with no problem. Not a single one of my parents was. So I paid for their participation from my school's funds. Not one parent was able to get their child to the campus. Two parents, single moms, were working (one was at work when I picked her daughter up; another was on her way to work when I picked her child up). One parent said she needed a ride because her daughter couldn't take public transportation to the campus; she didn't even know that there's no city bus that goes to this suburb. So I borrowed a friend's Jeep, plus that friend borrowed her mother's van (we pitched in for gas), so that we could transport my four students, plus my friend's daughter, plus my daughter (who's handicapped - I couldn't get a sitter).

Now we're running up on more costs. Each student needed $30 as a deposit in case they lost their room keys. Nobody had it. And each student was told to bring $50 spending money for the week, since they'd go bowling a couple of times and do other on-campus outings. Parents gave what they had, which amounted to about $20 for their kid. I gave the rest out of pocket, but told the girls they'd have to pay me back when they got their stipend.

Now at each step of the way, these financial obstacles threatened these students' participation. Nobody can tell me that money is not a reason why people don't attend or why people drop out of college. And the financial piece was not a case of lack of parental support. Proof of support was that these students completed the entire application process to get accepted into this program, and their parents completed the appropriate paperwork in a timely fashion. And, for two of the parents who were there when I picked up the kids, the whole entire family stood on the porch to bid good-bye to their loved one for the week. You would've thought the girls were going to Iraq or something. So the moral support was there, but the financial support was not.

Of course I had to give my 'big speech' before we left the girls on campus last week. After we got them registered and settled into their rooms, and after we went to the local Walgreen's to get a few items they needed but didn't have (hangers, room freshener), I had my talk with these ladies. I told them they have been given a golden opportunity, and they needed to take full advantage of it. I told them that a lot of effort has gone into they're being here, so they need to conduct themselves in a way that shows respect for themselves first, then for their family, then for our school.

Because I had already noticed a certain look on one of my student's faces (she looked a little nervous and intimated, esp. when her roommate looked down her nose at her and filled the room w. her entire family and this student was all alone except peers and me), I added this:

I told my girls that there would be people there who were more prepared than them, but they shouldn't let that make them feel "less than" anyone; instead, they should just work harder. I told them there was a chance they'd be more prepared than someone, but they shouldn't let that make them feel "better than" anyone; instead, they should be humble and helpful. I told them they need to soak up and learn everything they can about business and about college this whole week -- and it doesn't matter if they aren't interested in business. I told them they were a family, so they'd better take care of one another. If one person has an iron, they all have an iron. If one person has a cell phone, they all have a cell phone. I told them not to let any of them be late for classes -- to wake each other up and make sure each one has what they need to have a successful week. "We know, Miss Caine; yes, Miss Caine," were their replies, but I think they got the message.

I think they're having a ball, since nobody called me at all this week. Not even when I left a message with their chaperone for them to call me and let me know how they were doing.

Today I go to their presentation of business plans, and awards ceremony, and then I take them back home.

I was reminded of when I went to college. My mother had to get someone to drive us from NJ to CT (we had no car), and I was literally dropped off. Then my mother and her ride sped off. No one was there to get me situated -- to help me find my room, tour the campus with me, make sure I had all the things I needed, whatever. But other parents did that for their kids. I realize my mom, who'd never been to college herself, was likely uncomfortable in what was a foreign experience.

I want to do everything I can to make sure kids in my school don't have the same obstacles I did. I am going to work with my counselor so that every student visits colleges several times a year, including overnight visits, and so that as many students as possible attend these summer college programs.

Why? Because exposure means so much. It ignites a passion for college. It builds comfort level with a new experience by taking some of the mystery and uncertainty and uneasiness out of it. It challenges students by letting them meet and work with youth their age from all over the country, showing them what 'college-prep' really looks like and showing them how far they have to grow academically and socially.

And a big THANKS to the Entrenuity staff (Brian Jenkins and Tiffany Staley) for making space for my kids to have EXPOSURE. I know their futures will be different because of this past week.

On My Heart

Two different situations are on my heart this morning.

The first is the need to pray for two Christian families who've recently experienced the loss of loved ones in a very tragic, sudden way. Rev. Timothy Wright, Gospel singer and pastor of a COGIC church in Brooklyn, lost both his wife and grandson in a freak automobile accident this weekend. He's in critical condition himself. Someone was driving on the wrong side of the highway and hit them, and that driver died, too. This situation is so sad and really breaks my heart. I cannot imagine the pain this family must feel. It reminds me of a similar situation that occurred about a month or so ago. Steven Curtis Chapman, Christian Gospel singer, lost his five year-old daughter in a freak accident at his home. His teenaged son was backing an automobile out of the driveway and didn't see the precious little one, and struck her with the car and killed her. What's most ironic is that this little girl was one of two daughters that Steven and his wife adopted from China I believe, heeding the Lord's call to add to their birth children.

If these situations don't show that the godly are not exempt from tragedy, nothing will. Let's remember to "weep with those who weep" by joining our hearts with theirs in prayer to our heavenly Father, the God of all comfort, to be with these brothers and sisters in Christ in their time of need and sorrow.

The second situation is yet another example of how I feel like living as a Black person in America is like trying to swim to a shore and someone has put weights on your arms and cut your legs off. I feel like so much of American history as it relates to people of color is either not told, or is told so inaccurately that we don't have a strong sense of our accomplishments, nor do we have a clear idea of the history of injustice that our forefathers endured. Have you ever heard of something called Massive Resistance? Well, apparently, this week some Blacks were honored in VA for standing up and trying to integrate schools after the '54 Brown vs. Board of Education decision. The terrible part is that the state of VA launched an all-out war almost, a full-fledged campaign, to prevent that landmark decision from taking place. What was astonishing was that a lot of schools closed their doors rather than segregate, and the governor (who led this mess) enacted laws preventing schools that integrated from receiving State funds. What is most atrocious is that at one point an entire county (Prince George's, I believe) actually closed every single school in their county rather than integrate. Damn! Like Marvin Gaye said, "Makes me wanna holla, and throw up both my hands!"

Learning this angers me, but it also fills me with pride to see how far my people have come. Then when I hear Ralph Nader chiding Barack Obama for 'sounding white', I almost flip out again...

richard allem