Good Night

Tonight was a good night. Though I wasn't particularly excited about the evening at first, particularly after a long day's work, I actually did something I haven't done in a long time: had an enjoyable night out.

So my boss, my big boss, offers me some tickets to see the Joffrey Ballet. I recognize the big name, but am not super thrilled. After all, the one and only time I've ever been to a ballet was a fiasco: My sister bought tickets for my mom (Mother's Day), all of us siblings, and her best friend Angie who was in town. We went to NYC, ate a big dinner at fine restaurant, and then went to the Alvin Ailey dance performance. Maybe it was the food, maybe it was the orchestra- like music, but most of us fell asleep, and my sister was pissed. So let's say ballet and I don't have that great a relationship.

What made the evening a little more interesting was a friend's suggestion to take a former middle school student who is a high school junior now and who loves ballet. Great idea, I thought, esp. since it'd give us a chance to catch up. Jennifer was excited, but I still wasn't. I thought the evening would be ultra boring.

From the opening movement, the evening was really a beautiful one. Enthralling, engaging, amazing, funny, lovely -- all describe the dancers and their moves, the lighting, even the music. I actually enjoyed the whole performance. And, of course, Jennifer and I had a chance to find out what's been happening in one another's lives, and that was just as fun, too.

And I made it home by 10:30. What a good night.

Irresponsible Parents

Okay, so I've been trippin' lately over the huge responsibility parents have raising their kids and how it is so easy to mess up when it comes to child-rearing. Parents are human, and there's no rule book on parenting that we can follow, so a lot is learned through trial and error. One thing that's needed, though, is a willingness on the part of parents to admit their mistakes and not to act like they are the child (self-centered). Three recent celebrity situations come to mind when I think about this topic.

One is the atrocious voice mail that actor Alec Baldwin left for his 11 year-old daughter recently. What's even sadder is that when I played the clip for a friend, this person did not see anything wrong with Baldwin's ranting. The clip can be heard here:
http://www.tmz.com/2007/04/19/alec-baldwins-threatening-message-to-daughter/
This person said we don't know what the little girl did, and the problem with (white) kids today is that their parents don't discipline them, but let them do what they want. This person (who is Black) then said Baldwin talked to his daughter the way Black parents talk to their children all the time. She's right, but it's still sad. Nothing Baldwin's daughter did warrants her father's degrading, anger-filled comments.

The second is a blog entry by D-Nice, former hip hop artist of the '80s. D-Nice opens up and shares details of the pain caused by his absentee father:
http://www.d-nice.com/journal/archives/000095.php

The last is a reality show called "I Married A Baller" that I stumbled upon this weekend. One of the members of a female R&B group from the '90s married this retired football player named Eddie George, and their family activities are featured in this reality show, kind of like Run's House. Well, Eddie George's father was rarely there for him growing up but this hasn't stopped this football hero from pursuing a relationship with his dad today. He goes out of his way to invite his dad to spend time with his family, even to attend big events like his induction into the Hall of Fame. And all of this despite the fact that his dad is still struggling with drug addiction and is very uncomfortable and 'fidgety' at these gatherings. Part of Eddie George's relationship with his dad is sweet, seeing him play the role of the adult and forgive his father and try to give his father what his father didn't give him. Another part strikes me as enabling, though, and as something that should not have to be.

D-Nice and Eddie George both have made very different choices when it comes to dealing with their irresponsible fathers, and I can't say who's right and who's wrong. All I can do is mourn the fact that there are thousands of others like them -- adults struggling to deal with the wounds of parents who act(ed) more like kids than adults.

VA Tech Tragedy

My heart goes out to all those affected personally by this tragedy. I am praying and grieving with the victims' loved ones, though I know the sadness I feel is nothing compared to what they are going through.

Great shock, sadness, then anger about how easy it is to get a gun, then compassion even for the gunman (who was obviously mentally ill) were some of my initial feelings. Purposely I avoided watching too much coverage of this incident because, sadly, I did not want to feel deeply the pain and heartache I knew I would feel hearing details. Just this morning I watched the clip below my cousin sent me, and I cried.

http://cosmos.bcst.yahoo.com/ver/225/popup/index.php?cl=2418838

Just want to encourage folks to let yourselves 'feel' in this situation, and maybe it will prompt you to pray for victims' families, even for the victim himself, and vote for legislation making it more difficult to get ahold of guns, as well as for policies that serve the mentally ill.

BUILD - Part Two

Okay, so it's been a minute since the first part of this blog, but things have been kinda busy (starting a new high school, from scratch, is no joke!). Anyway, here's an update on the rest of last week's BUILD conversation that had me a bit jazzed...

Our group's conversation about community, and about whether or not you can be effective in urban ministry without relocating to the community, somehow got onto the subject of home ownership. I think one guy noted how young singles with no families sometimes buy expensive condos in one community, flip them, and then do the same thing in another community, without any consideration for how they've helped destabilize those neighborhoods (i.e., effects of gentrification). As a group we really struggled with how you improve conditions in a community without displacing folks (I think Mary Nelson talked about development without displacement the way Lupton speaks of gentrification with justice). Personally, this is an area I think all of us would like more time devoted to. Anyway, one group member (young well meaning white man) tried to make the point that home ownership is greatly overrated, and it's actually a good idea to encourage families in the 'hood to rent rather than own a home.

Well, I was really jazzed because we all know that owning property is one of the best ways to stabilize a family and a community (I'm not talking about a poor family owning a home when they aren't ready; nor am I talking about buying more home than you can afford.) I find it irresponsible to encourage working class poor to pay month after month of high rent on someone else's property, rather than pay that same money on something they will eventually own, not to mention something they can rent partially (to help pay the mortgage and/or to go towards rainy day and college and retirement savings, and to get a tax refund for annually in the meantime). The young man's point about upkeep of a home being a cost some folks don't consider before buying was well taken, but it assumed I am for going out and telling every poor person on the West side to buy a home, indiscriminately. I am in favor of working class families getting themselves in financial order and working towards that goal sooner rather than later (or not at all, which is most often the case).

Okay, another Black woman added that families who own homes in the neighborhood have a greater investment there, which this white young man refuted and couldn't understand. I pointed out how owning a home in a community does make you more concerned about litter, trash, garbage pick-up, crime, even the schools, because all of that affects not just your property value, but your quality of life. (Kind of like the point this same person made earlier about how living in the community you serve gives you a greater sense of urgency about it than living in another area of the same city!) When you are renting and bouncing from place to place, you are still concerned, but not to the same degree. Why? Because you are not invested to the same degree. Also, I noted that home ownership decreases students' mobility rate, a real problem for teachers. I know principals who bemoan the fact that their schools have mobility rates as high as 60 or 70%. Every study shows constant mobility does nothing but disrupt a child's education, social support structures, etc., undermining the learning and socialization process.

Another white gentleman responded that Jesus was homeless, and that we should go back to Acts 2. That struck me as being funny. Jesus was not rich, that much I do know, contrary to TV evangelists (His parents offered a dove and pigeon when He was born, rather than the lamb or cattle of non-poor families). But, many of Jesus' women followers had money, so much so that they supported Him from their substance. Not only that, but there were rich disciples (Joseph of Arimathea, as one of the fellas pointed out). And the Gospel hit Ceasar's household as well as his servants -- it converted Onesimus the runaway slave as well as Philemon his master.

Another response was how Jesus said don't store up treasures on earth. Okay, so was He talking about not having money, or money not having you? The latter. The Book of Proverbs speaks of a wise man leaving an inheritance for his children's children. And Jesus had a problem with the rich man because 1) he ignored Lazarus, the poor man; and 2) he left God out of his existence, living a self-led life marked by "I"s and evidenced by tons of preparation for his earthly life but no preparation for his spiritual life or for his after-life. Lastly, the NT addresses poor Christians and rich Christians (those who are rich in this world), telling the latter not to put their trust in uncertain riches and to remember the poor. Those passages tell me there will be rich and poor Christians -- everybody won't be on the same level.

The Book of Acts was history -- not a prescription. It gives us principles to live by -- not a blueprint (otherwise, we'd all be speaking in tongues like at Pentecost). Plus, the Acts 2 believers lived communally because when they became followers of Christ, many of them were persecuted (lost property, which included their homes -- check out the Book of Hebrews). So, the early church responded to an immediate need for large numbers of converted folks to have a place to live (i.e., the folks who were at Pentecost were in Jerusalem for this feast, and when they were converted, they were far away from home; later, the persecution kicked in). When you look at the church not too later, you realize folks had homes (people were praying in Peter's mother in law's home, I believe, when Peter was in prison; the apostle John warns Christians not to receive traveling false teachers into their homes; and there were even house churches -- all of which tell you folks had personal property; communal living was not long term).

I certainly agree with the fellas desire to purge American Christianity of our materialism and individualism and our tendency to, as one young white brother said, find our identity in our homes. I feel too much of today's Christianity is really white American, Western Christianity and modern philosophy in disguise (which is how you can have a prosperity gospel and how you can have politics that assume America's right since we are a 'Christian nation' -- also funny to me). However, I don't think the solution is some romantic fantasy of communal living. I think you'll find just as much sin on the commune as you will outside of it (ask Ananias and Sapphira). I think the solution lies in a return to Scripture's counsel (let's re-examine God's Word to hear His concern for the poor and His admonitions to the wealthy, and then let's live those out, and we'll be straight). People unwisely find their identities in all kinds of things -- their jobs, their loved ones, even their ministries -- but we don't advocate the elimination of those things. Instead, we support putting them in proper perspective.

Lastly, I think this situation is a prime example of the divide between white and Black Christians. Just as it was incomprehensible to me to suggest to working class poor Black folks not to pursue home ownership, my perspective was equally unfathomable to my white brothers. I think personal experience, based on race and class (as well as personal beliefs or theology) created the gap in understanding. As I stated, I know what it's like to have a mother who's almost 60, who has worked at the same job for 32 years, yet who does not have a home and does not have any retirement savings at all, and for whom retirement is nowhere in sight. Once my mother gets too old or too sick to work (which we thought was a couple of years ago with hip surgery), she will not be able to live off Social Security. By God's grace, what will keep her from being a Breakthrough client is the fact that she has adult children who can and will take her in and care for her and support her. Many people don't have that. And, as a single mother with a multiply-handicapped child whom I will care for for the rest of her life, I cannot afford to be as unwise as my hard-working mother. I must have a home and retirement savings because I have no daughter to care for me in my old age.

Two Good Books

Right now I am reading two good books:

1) Juan Williams's Enough: The Phony Leaders, Dead-End Movements, and Culture of Failure That Are Undermining Black America -- and What We Can Do About It; and

2) Mary Pattillo's Black on the Block: The Politics of Race and Class in the City

Juan Williams is a political analyst for Fox News and a panelist on Fox News Sunday (I love watching him on Sundays when I don't have to teach Sun. Sch.). He's also a correspondent for NPR.

Mary Pattillo is a prof of sociology and African-American Studies at Northwestern.

The first book, inspired by Bill Cosby's controversial comments on race and class not too long ago, is a hue and cry about self-sabotaging behavior in the Black community. In the tradition of Marcus Garvey, BTW (a bit), WEB, and others, Williams makes the case for Black self-help and self-critique. And though he aptly challenges the common man, he really takes to task our leaders.

The second book traces the recent history of the North Kenwood-Oakland part of Chicago, examining everything from their educational institutions to their housing development, to see how Blacks from various economic groups have fared in this South Side community. Very interesting...

After Imus

Okay, so now that the racist, sexist remarks of the above media man have been soundly condemned, it's time to move on to larger implications within the Black community.

Though the use of the N word and of sexist comments in hip hop certainly fail to justify Imus' statements, they do point to a broader issue that plagues our community. A friend sent me a YouTube video that I cannot even post a link to, which was filled with some of the worst caricatures of Black women and men that I have seen in some time. The video was made by a young southern African-American rapper who is extremely popular today. What is disturbing is that this 'artist' is not alone -- similar lyrics are pumped over the airwaves almost 24-7 (through radio and TV/videos), and their demand is so strong that they have made millionaires of many young Black rappers.

I'm a child of the Black ghetto, not at all shocked by some of the harsh realities that hip hop lyricists rap about. So I am saddened to see how hip hop has transformed from party music and protest music to music that glorifies the materialism and sexism of this age. Its vast popularity speaks to the fact that we have a problem as a community (and a nation), because we have no problem objectifying women on the regular (both in words and images) and we have no problem perpetuating stereotypes of our own people.

Though we didn't create Imus, we have certainly given him ammunition. It is wrong and hypocritical of us to castigate Imus and not take to task at all our own people whose words are also damaging and problematic. Do I equate Imus' statements with those of rap artists? Do I think the latters' words excuse the former's? Nope. But I do think we cannot ignore what is thrust into our face everyday: words and pictures of our women that reduce us to sex objects, and words and pictures of our men that reduce them to caricatures (pimps, criminals, etc.).

Though I was deeply hurt by Imus's remarks, I am grateful for this one thing: the incident helped shine light on a larger problem that needs to be addressed.

Today's BUILD - Part One

Okay, so today's BUILD was a mix of inspiration and frustration. Mary Nelson's hour-long overview of Bethel New Life's three-decade work in Garfield Park was awesome. I was floored by the audacity (to use her term) of community elders years ago who decided to get into housing. I was amazed by the courage and perseverance of community leaders and lay people in the face of setbacks, no's, and other struggles. And I came away jazzed by our awesome God who has done such a great work through ordinary people. The asset-based approach to community development was very instructive for me, especially as I start a new high school that I hope will be community-oriented. I was challenged to view the students and families as having individual strengths and the community as possessing a wealth of resources in their associations, institutions, cultural history, stories, and land. And then connecting those resources was a further insight. As I think about and begin to form partnerships with those outside of the community for the benefit of my students, I must do what I have said I will do and look within the community as well -- I cannot ignore what people bring to the table themselves. My prayer is: Lord, give me the eyes to see what You have placed within the West side communities, and give me the humility and courage and wisdom to tap into those resources.

Okay, so that was the inspiration part....

After Ms. Nelson left, BUILD folks sat around and talked about questions her talk had sparked within us. One question that came up was whether or not it is essential to live within the community in which you serve -- whether or not you can truly have an impact on the poor if you don't live among them. I think we all agreed that the greatest impact you can have is when you are a part of the community you seek to serve. One young man shared how (though not from personal experience) your sense of urgency about poverty issues is heightened when you live in the neighborhood and hear gunshots at night yourself, versus being told about the experience from someone else. Yet, we all know folks who support city ministry both with finances and through volunteering, but who live in the suburbs or in better parts of the city. One woman talked about friends who have grown up 'in the hood' and don't want their children to experience the trials and tribulations of city life that they did, so they move out of the hood. Another young man commented how they take resources from the city (fellow Blacks in this case) so you have Black flight. I added, though, that I know folks who have a burden for urban ministry because that was their reality growing up, but they no longer live in the community. However, they are very active and have the same (or close to it) sense of urgency that community members have.

My personal thought on this matter is that you are most effective when you are a member of the community in which you serve (you relocate and live there), but you can have a degree of effectiveness if you have a sensitivity to city issues. I personally do not think everyone is called to live in the 'hood. I think God has His people everywhere, serving in all walks of life. I don't think it's any more spiritual to minister to the homeless than it is to minister to rich college kids. However, I do think God is calling every child of His to have a heart for the city, a sensitivity to its residents' needs, and a mentality that considers and cares for the poor and needy. What this translates into varies from person to person. For some, it is using their power and clout to affect legislation that supports the forgotten -- everything from fighting for a living wage to working for a change in the way public education is funded. For others, it is spending time on a regular basis volunteering in some way. For others, like my friend who grew up in the hood and no longer lives there, it is mentoring young people in foster family situations while caring for her daughters as a single mom. This woman is not concerned only with going to her daughter's volleyball games and dance recitals; she goes to the sports events of the youth she mentors, pays for them to have dance lessons along with her daughters, and makes sure they get into college as well as her daughter. Yet she doesn't live in the hood. But no one would say she has taken her resources away from the hood and abandoned those who could benefit from her example and her means.

Just my thoughts...

Bet You Didn't Know...

... about these famous people who suffer(ed )from bipolar disorder (a.k.a. manic-depression)

Alvin Ailey
Buzz Aldrin, astronaut
Hans Christian Anderson, writer
Honors de Balzac
Ned Beatty, writer
Beethoven
Maurice Benard (Sonny, General Hospital)
William Blake, poet
Art Buchwald, writer, humorist
Tim Burton, artist, movie director
Lord Byron
Drew Carey
Jim Carrey
Dick Cavett, writer, media personality
Agatha Christie
Winston Churchill, prime minister
Rosemary Clooney, singer
Francis Ford Coppola, director
Charles Dickens
Emily Dickinson
Patty Duke
T.S. Eliot
Ralph Waldo Emerson
William Faulkner
Carrie Fisher, writer, actress
Robert Frost
F. Scott Fitzgerald
Connie Francis
Sigmund Freud
Cary Grant
Graham Greene, writer
Alexander Hamilton, politician
Mariette Hartley
Victor Hugo
Phyllis Hyman
Jack London
Robert Lowell, poet
Marilyn Monroe
Mozart
Kristy McNichol
Isaac Newton
Florence Nightingale
Jane Pauley
J.C. Penney
Plato
Poe
Charley Pride
Theodore Roosevelt
St Francis
Sidney Sheldon
Rod Steiger, film maker
Robert Louis Stevenson
Ben Stiller
Liz Taylor, actor
Mark Twain, author
Alfred, Lord Tennyson, poet
Ted Turner, entrepreneur, media giant
Jean-Claude Van Damme, athlete, actor
Vincent van Gogh
Kurt Vonnegut
Walt Whitman, poet
Robin Williams
Tennessee Williams, author
Jonathan Winters, comedian, actor, writer, artist
Robert E Lee, soldier
Abraham Lincoln (1809-1865), US President
Samuel Johnson, poet
Burgess Meredith, 1908-1997, actor, director

To name a few…

Adult Advocacy

Okay, so I've always known this truth, but I'm realizing it more deeply lately, and it is this:
children's and youths' education is heavily a factor of what I call adult advocacy.

As I visit elementary schools to speak with 8th graders directly about our new high school, almost without exception, the youth are eager about the opportunity. I am well-received, and that reception is shown by the kinds of questions asked and, even when some students don't ask questions, by their attentiveness. What's been really eye-opening for me has been the contrast in the commitment of guidance counselors and teachers across schools.

Some schools I visit, like Tilton and Hammond, have awesome counselors who you can tell care about and are committed to their kids. These adult advocates, as I call them, go to great lengths to make sure their students complete and turn in applications for our school. In the case of the Hammond counselor, she and the two outstanding 8th grade teachers brought carloads of students to two open house sessions when most of their parents could not make it, to ensure their chances for a seat in our school. The counselor at Tilton, a school I visited later in my recruitment efforts, had already worked to have most of her 8th graders already placed in good schools even before I came. There were only about 8 students still in need of placement when I came in early April, a sign, as I told the counselor, that she is doing her job and doing right by her kids.

What's been saddening, though, are schools where the adult advocates aren't advocating. At one school I went to this week, I told the counselor about our website and how an application could be downloaded from it and copied for students (since I only had limited copies on me). This woman proceeded to complain how she's a counselor yet doesn't have a printer. When I asked if there were any other printers in the building, she said yes hesitatingly, but said they belong to other people and she doesn't want to use them. Then she added that she isn't willing to use her printer at home for school purposes. Whatever 'beef' this counselor has with other adults in the building, what was communicated to me was that she does not care enough about students to even make sure they get an application for a good school. It's no wonder that out of several classes of 8th graders, only 6 had been placed so far in this school (in contrast to the 8 who had not been placed in the other school). Thankfully, one of the 8th grade teachers had a printer in his classroom, but the counselor's only question for me (which she asked publicly when I opened the floor for students to ask questions) was whether or not we were a charter. What does that have to do with the price of tea in China? I was proud to say we were not, but what if we were? What difference would that make for kids? In all the questions I've been asked by kids, never has any student asked whether or not our school is a charter. That's because that issue is an adult one -- not a kid one. And again, the counselor showed her true colors: she was more concerned with herself than with her students.

What have I learned from these visits? Well, first and foremost, I am thankful for those God placed around me when I was young who advocated for me in some way or another -- for those who took up the slack from what was missing in my home so that I could have a future. My sister is top of the list. My aunt, grandparents, and Sunday School teacher are not too far behind. Some of my teachers at school make the list, too.

What needs to happen in the lives of youth today is they need other adults to take up the slack, so to speak, when those who should be their advocates are not. I think about an after-school coordinator who learned about our school and encouraged youth in her program to apply. And she went the extra mile when the parent/guardian didn't show for the mandatory enrollment session to secure her seat. This after-school worker 'standing in the gap' so to speak and taking up the cause of this young girl can make the difference between a quality high school experience or a hellish one. The difference between a bright future and a gloomy one.

Adult advocates, where are you?

Of Imus and School Violence

Okay, so you can already tell that this entry will be a little scattered in topic.

Well, I must say the decision to pull the plug on Imus' radio show was music to my ears. Not that I make it a habit of relishing in another person's trials, but I was ecstatic to see the issues of racism and sexism taken seriously for a change. However, I cannot fully rejoice because I feel MSNBC (my opinion) only axed Imus in order to woo sponsors back. How convenient that Imus' firing came after Proctor and Gamble, Staple's, GM, and others pulled their ads from NBC over Imus' remarks. Don't know whether to rejoice or fume...

Oh, and I was deeply saddened to hear that, after my blog on school violence a few days ago, the next day there was another school shooting (two students shot in one incident) at the same school I talked about in my blog before. Though I was pleased to learn this shooting was accidental (a student brought a gun to school and accidentally it went off and shot another student in the thigh and the bullet richocheted and caught the shooter, I think), I was still gloomy over the fact that the student could get the gun into the building in the first place. I am not surprised, though, because on two different occasions I visited the school to see a teacher, and both times I entered an open door that had no security guard (not the front door), and never in the building did anyone ask me (or a colleague who also visited) what we were there for (even though we stayed for over an hour each time). Not safe at all....

Why Al Sharpton Is Popular (And Why It's Hard To Hold Onto Hope)

At a BUILD alumni meeting a few months ago, we were discussing why the voices of the Revs. Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton are so popular among African-Americans when these men themselves have tainted pasts and often come across as self-promoting demagogues. When I discussed the angst I feel about having these men serve as the voice of the people, given their motives and pasts are not exactly pure, one African-American man asked, "Joyce, isn't any voice better than no voice at all?" At the time, I wasn't sure.

After the Don Imus-Rutgers U. Female Basketball Team incident, I found myself cheering Al Sharpton on as he demanded disciplinary action of the racist radio host. At the time, I did not care about Sharpton's questionable history at all; I was simply grateful that someone was horrified by the same injustice I was, and cared enough to speak up and to speak out.

My gratitude soon turned into sadness, though, when I waited day after day for members of the evangelical community to say something about this incident. Not only were the folks silent who I expected to be silent (the James Dobsons, Jerry Falwells, and Pat Robertsons of the world, and those like them), but folks I expected to speak up were quiet as well. No blog entries expressing horror and disgust over Imus' clearly stereotypical views. Nope. I wonder why. Maybe a desire not to be 'negative'. Now I can see why Black Muslims were so popular in the sixties.

I also thought about my best friend Barbara, who attended Rutgers U. as an undergrad many years ago. She told me about a time when her white roommate, unbeknownst to her, copied her paper, and how their professor automatically assumed she was the person who cheated. The professor called Barbara in and chided her for copying from the white roommate. The look in Barbara's eyes as she explained how it didn't even enter her professor's mind that she had actually been the bright and hard-working one, was pretty painful to see. The expectation of being incompetent, of being 'less than', is truly devastating.

So whether degrading views are voiced based on intelligence, or based on appearance (as in the case of the basketball players), great damage has been done.

Reminds me of this Countee Cullen poem entitled, ironically, "Incident": (and not knowing who Countee Cullen is is another sad commentary on Blacks being ignored in America)

"Incident"

Once riding in old Baltimore,
Heart-filled, head-filled with glee,
I saw a Baltimorean
Keep looking straight at me.
Now I was eight and very small,
And he was no whit bigger,
And so I smiled, but he poked out
His tongue, and called me, "Nigger."
I saw the whole of Baltimore
From May until December;
Of all the things that happened there
That's all that I remember.

Langston Hughes - "I Dream A World"

Here's the great poem by the Shakespeare of the Harlem Renaissance:

"I Dream A World"

I dream a world where man
No other man will scorn,
Where love will bless the earth
And peace its paths adorn.
I dream a world where all
Will know sweet freedom's way,
Where greed no longer saps the soul
Nor avarice blights our day.
A world I dream where black or white,
Whatever race you be,
Will share the bounties of the earth
And every man is free,
Where wretchedness will hang its head
And joy, like a pearl,
Attends the needs of all mankind--
Of such I dream, my world!

I Dream A School

For a little over a week now, I have not been able to get out of my mind a conversation I had with a young girl at our youth retreat. She doesn't go to our church, so this was my first time meeting her. A sophomore, she commented how she does not like to go to school. When I inquired why, she proceeded to point to the huge scar on the side of her face.

This teenager then told me about how she was cut in the face by a girl who goes to her school, and how the scar looks much better because it was much bigger. When I asked what happened to the girl, I was told she was allowed back into the school, and cut another girl in her throat. The fear that this sophomore has of being a victim of violence is a harsh reality, and it's keeping her from having a normal high school experience.

Just so happens that at this retreat, I had in my pocket a newspaper clipping of her high school (not knowing it was hers when I put the article in my pocket). Her school was in the paper for two incidents where students were shot in the school parking lot -- two times this school year. I clipped the article because I visited the school twice to see a teacher there, and I thought of how I could've easily been a victim of violence intended for someone else.

The sad reality is that this situation is not unique. Incidents of violence like this occur all the time in inner city high schools. When discussing this situation with a youth worker later at the retreat, he recounted how his brother was 'shot up' very badly at his high school, and returned.

What is going on in our schools? I dream a school where students will be able to learn in a safe environment. I dream a school where youngsters will be able to focus on their studies, on fostering healthy relationships with one another, and on dreaming about and planning for their bright futures.

I dream a school...

Why I Love Hip Hop

Okay, so I could write all day on this matter, but I'm going to just focus on one reason right now:

Hip hop is the voice of the masses; it is the language of the streets. Like it or lump it, hip hop is a major vehicle through which common folks get to have their say -- to let their voice be heard. Granted, sometimes the voice is angry, sometimes it's materialistic and misogynistic (hope I spelled that right), and sometimes it is downright selfish and unbiblical. At other times that voice is insightful, poignant, compassionate, and powerful. Either way, it's still the voice of the people.

Like other music and art forms, hip hop expresses the sentiments of the day; it exposes the philosophies and belief systems of many people of its time. This is what is meant when you hear rappers defend themselves against criticism, simply stating that they are "keeping it real", writing about reality and what they see, being honest, and reflecting society. Though I disagree that mirroring the age is the primary duty of artists, on one level I see their point. Wanna know what common folks of our day value and believe? Listen to their poets, hip hop artists.

This does not mean I blindly accept or support hip hop (culture) in its totality. No, like other cultures, I am affirming of its positives and critical of its negatives and yes, today's hip hop is not all good. I can understand the concerns of those who bemoan lyrics that: 1) objectify women, 2) glorify criminal activities and immoral practices that land many of my people behind bars or unproductive, and 3) fail to use its mass appeal and influence to uplift the masses. However,I cannot listen to hip hop for long without its words resonating within my heart. When rappers point out injustices and hypocrisies and pains of human existence, people can 'feel' them; that is one of the main reasons rap is so popular.

Well, this post is too long already. I'm going to end with some Tupac and Biggie ("Running/Dyin' To Live") - words that encapsulate the frustration of many (not just poor Blacks):

"Why am I fighting to live, If I'm just living to fight?

Why am I trying to see, When there ain't nothing in sight?

Why am I trying to give, When no one gives me a try?

Why am I dying to live, If I'm just living to die?"

Good Read

Right now I am reading an excellent book by D.A Carson called Becoming Conversant with the Emerging Church: Understanding a Movement and Its Implications. I highly recommend this book for all Christians to read. Essentially it examines the emerging/emergent church movement and what is right and what is wrong about it. The author gives a pretty even-handed analysis, being more gracious than I likely would have been in terms of presenting the movement's strengths, and being humbly honest in assessing its weaknesses. This book is a must-read for any Christian who wants to respond biblically to our post-modern culture.

Competing Interests

Okay, so I'm going to weigh in on the whole upcoming presidential election thing.

This morning as I listened to the news, I thought how untrue the statement is that anybody can become president. As I heard newscasters rattle off just how much money various presidential hopefuls have raised for their campaigns ($24 mil I think was the tops), I thought about how unlikely it is that someone born poor has making it to the Executive Seat. I don't want to sound negative and I don't want to discourage progress, but it takes a great deal of money and connections to reach that position. The candidate I would vote for in a heartbeat, Dennis Kucinich, probably won't even be in the running because I doubt he could raise a fraction of what Edwards, McCain, and others have managed to amass for their runs.

And this whole Obama thing has me tripping. On one hand, I am so proud of this candidate of color, and I am infuriated by racist comments like Sen. Biden's. On the other hand, I am frustrated with Al Sharpton and others who allude to the fact that Obama is not 'Black enough', that his journey has not been that of other Black presidential hopefuls, and that he does not defer enough to Black America. Yes, I respect the fact that Sharpton and others don't want Obama to assume he has the Black vote, and that they want Obama to really represent the interests of African-Americans. However, there's something in Sharpton's tone and comments that smack of the whole 'crabs in a barrel' metaphor...

And one more thing: Should I vote for Obama or Hillary? Both, along with Edwards, represent my interests more than any Republican candidate (and I just can't stand Guiliani). But, even in preliminary discussions over who I should vote for, it seems my people of color expect me to show racial allegiance and to ignore the fact that though I am Black, I am a woman, also. Hillary has more political experience than Obama, but I know there are a lot of very experienced congressmen/women for whom I wouldn't cast my ballot. I dunno. I think this political campaign will be a very interesting one....

Suffering

Today I read in Paul's letter to the Church at Colosse:

"Now I rejoice in my sufferings for your sake, and in my flesh I do my share on behalf of His body, which is the church, in filling up what is lacking in Christ's afflictions.

Of this church I was made a minister according to the stewardship from God bestowed on me for your benefit, so that I might fully carry out the preaching of the word of God,..." (1:24-25)

What initially stood out to me from these verses is the oddness of Paul rejoicing in his sufferings. I was struck by how unusual and illogical it is to respond to suffering with joy. Then I thought back to Paul in other places (how in Acts 5:41, he and others rejoiced that they were counted worthy to suffer for Christ's name; and how another prison letter, this time to the Philippians, abounded with references to being joyful, though his natural condition of imprisonment left a lot to be desired). So as odd as this response is to me, at least Paul is consistent!

Then I thought about the words of Jesus Christ Himself: that our attitude towards suffering for Him (persecuted was the term He used) should be rejoicing (Matthew 5:10-12).

My next thought was, "Why? Why in the world would anyone respond to any kind of suffering with joy?" Well, in the case of suffering for Christ and His Church, there are numerous reasons: 1) It is an honor to be connected with Christ, even by suffering for Him and as He did; 2) Jesus said our heavenly reward is great when we are persecuted for Him; and 3) Suffering to share Christ and His Gospel with others is worth it when we see folks' present lives and eternal destinies forever changed by the transforming power of salvation.

Well, my thoughts now turned inward. I asked myself, "Joyce, what is your attitude toward suffering for Christ?" Wish I could say something different, but it wasn't pretty. My tendency is to shrink back from it, avoid it at all costs, even rail against those at whose hands I suffer. Part of this is natural and understandable. I mean, who in her right mind signs up for the school of suffering? No one. But there is another part of me that seeks to avoid association with Christ and His work simply because of the suffering it brings. And that is not good. It is tantamount to being ashamed of Christ.

Next my mind moved to a rather basic but oft-overlooked point: We will suffer for Christ. The how differs depending on our situation or locale, but the fact remains the same. I believe it was Timothy who made the observation that ALL who live godly in Christ Jesus will suffer persecution. This remark does not mean we should be anti-culture or that we should disengage from the world around us. It simply means salt doesn't just preserve; it stings. Light doesn't just illuminate; it hurts the eyes and it exposes the dirt. Jesus said some people didn't receive Him because He was the Light and they loved darkness more because their deeds were evil and they didn't want anyone shedding light on them. What's really bugged is Jesus' comments to His disciples about their new relationship with the world. In a word, he characterized it as HATE. Dang! Check out John 15:18-25. Contrary to the beliefs of my post-modern-loving friends, Jesus' language in this passage is pretty exclusive rather than inclusive. There is clearly an in and an out group. There is a sharp dichotomy of those who belong to Him and those who do not. And there's not a hint of arrogance in Jesus' relation of these realities; He's just kicking the facts. And it's like He's preparing His followers for what they will experience (antagonism and hostility at times from those in the world) so that they will not be devastated when they go through it. And get this: Jesus used Himself as the prime example of being hated by the world and suffering at its hands.

My take-aways:
Joyce, never fear being who you are, whether it is at work or with dissenting Christians. Never fear the feelings of being different, of being an outcast or oddball, that come from being associated with Christ. Don't try to blend in so much that you lose your Christian uniqueness, your distinctiveness (salt is then good for nothing). Don't hide your light under a bushel. If you do, how will folks be drawn to the Light?

And from the example of Jesus, Paul, and other martyrs, it's clear that my response to persecution and suffering for Christ should never be physical retaliation or even feelings of superiority or arrogance (all were mad humble) or even being ashamed of the Gospel so much so that I cease to share it or cease to live it. No, the response is to commit myself to the One who is able to keep me and to even use me amidst my suffering.